Caregiving

As I age, I have been looking for a complete guide for end of life planning which would include all information pertaining to my family having access to info like passwords, legal contacts, insurance, monthly bills,etc as they transition into handling issues I deal with daily. there are several retail products available, like nokbox but I was trying to see if AARP has any product or recommendation. Unfortunately, there is nothing on the website nor the agent I spoke with had nothing as well.Perhaps this might be something that could be explored as a benefit or product. 

Morning, It is so nice to know AARP has a group I can connect with in this time of need. Thank you, Deborah D Carter

It’s been 15 months since my husband of 50+ years  died and it’s been worst than the first few months were. How do I ever move on?

Hi everyone.  I lost my dad Thanksgiving weekend.  He and I did everything together--we were gym buddies for 27 years (our last workout together was one year and 3 days before he passed).  We shared lots of hobbies: antique cars, Civil War history, etc.  It's been very difficult. The worst is when something unexpectedly reminds you.  I was at the dentist the other day when the song "Everything I Own" by Bread came on.  It was just awful!  Especially since I distinctly remember when I was a child and my dad explained to me that David Gates wrote that song when his own father died. It looks like you have some great resources here, and I've already signed up for a webinar. Thanks, Dana

My college roommate was my roommate for life- found we were cousins, I was her caregiver for 28 years after a devastating car accident . Hit from behind by govt van. Weasley lawyer ( he looked like a weasel) got him off. She died 6/7/2024. I’m now along for the first time in my life. I’m 74 and quite alone. No family nearby. Still trying to navigate isolation, silence, boredom. I miss her so much, but she is hale and healthy now and I will see her again. 

I LOSS MY 24 year old daughter 16 years ago but still feels like yesterday..was hoping for a group that understands and be there for each other

Lost my husband 6 years ago but can’t seem to move forward. i was his caregiver and miss his presence every day. I need help living my life without him. 

II am attending a grief workshop thru my church for six weeks.  I also attended a 4 week similar workshop in the Fall but this one uses a very good book on grief as a guide for discussion and also includes a journal to write thoughts.  The bottom line seems to be that everyone has their own grief journey to make and whatever you are feeling at a certain time of day or night is perfectly legitimate.  One of my sons said to me that in the spring and summer it will be easier because then I'll be outside gardening and doing yardwork.  That's true.  It has been a long sometimes dreary winter but that doesn't change the fact that I will still be by myself puttering around in the yard and remembering the flower beds he made for me and the deck on the porch.  It kinds of stabs me in the heart.  I continue to cycle thru these first holidays and it isn't that easy but what is the alternative? I have alot to look forward to also. Thanks for letting me share some

One of the most difficult tasks for caregivers is to find the money to pay for care. It's often like a puzzle with many pieces coming together to finance the overall care.  If you're caregiving for someone at home (in their own home or your home), there are services and supports available through the aging network and other organizations which bring care and help to your loved ones at home or are offered in the local community. These services are called "Home- and Community-Based" services. The services are often available at no cost or at a reduced cost, or on a sliding-fee-scale (the cost is based on the recipient's ability to pay). Some services are based on income (for example if they are provided through Medicaid), but many are not income-based and are available to any older adult or person with a disability.  Home- and community-based services may include: Senior centers Adult daycares Congregate meal sites Home-delivered meal programs Personal care from a care aide, home

My oldest brother was my mentor friend historian in last few years of his 88 yrs we talked on phone 3-4 times a week. He supported me in so many ways as my husband in midst of Alzheimer’s gratefully Mary Ellen  

When someone you love is nearing the end of life, it can be hard to know what to expect or how best to help. Sometimes, care means holding a hand, playing a favorite song or simply sitting together.This AARP article offers guidance on providing comfort, honoring your loved one’s wishes and leaning on the hospice team for support. It also shares a reassuring reminder: Taking a break to rest or care for yourself doesn’t diminish your love or dedication.Read: How Caregivers Can Prepare for a Loved One’s Final DaysIf you feel comfortable sharing, what has helped you feel supported during end-of-life caregiving—or what do you wish someone had told you? Your experience may help another caregiver feel less alone.

After a while, following the death of someone close to you, you begin to have moments and sometimes a few hours during which you feel absorbed in something pleasant, and “forget” to think about your loved one. Do you sometimes feel a pang of guilt when you’ve had a good time “without her/him?”  One antidote to feeling disloyal and guilty for feeling good for a change, is to imagine that your loved one is smiling down at you and cheering you on. That they’d approve of your enjoyment if they were still on this earth.Do any of you feel this way sometimes?

Hi everyone! I wanted to make sure you all know that AARP is now offering virtual, online caregiver support groups where you can talk, live, with your fellow caregivers! I facilitate the Monday group at 3:30 pm ET and my colleague Jane Lincoln facilitates the Thursday group at 7 pm ET.We will be adding more groups soon, so keep checking if these times don’t work for you! (I’ll provide updates here in the Online Community when we add mtg times). You can go to this link to sign up! https://www.heypeers.com/organizations/173 Sign up for up to 5 mtgs at a time and you can keep signing up for more after each meeting you attend. You can attend every week as many times as you’d like, or you can drop in now and then when you can. You’ll find lots of empathy, listening ears, humor, resources and much support in our virtual groups! Hope to see you there! Take care,Amy Goyer, AARP Natl. Family & Caregiving Expert   

Caregiving can be very draining, isolating and exhausting - even when we want to care for our loved ones.  How do you fill our tank so you can keep going? What helps you recharge your batteries? What nurtures your soul so you can continue to care for you loved ones?!  P.S. If you need ideas, our free Care for the Caregiver guide includes so practical things you can do every day! www.AARP.org/careforthecaregiver  Take care,Amy Goyer, AARP Natl. Family & Caregiving Expert

Great day, I am looking for an online Caregiver support group. I work full-time and take care of my Mom. Seeking a safe space to connect with other caregivers.

I just took your quiz "Quiz: Caring for Someone With Dementia" and it made me think. My wife passed away with Lewy Body Dementia and I was wondering if you could maybe do a piece on the different forms of dementia. Also would one "cure" work with all types? We hear of Alzheimer's all the time but very little on other forms. 

New here, I am my husband’s caretaker, he has advanced Parkinsons.  We have been married 52 years, both retired.  Most difficult is I never get to have ‘me’ time and worry what will I do if he gets bed bound.  Uses rollator in home very slowly and wheelchair away from home.

I am looking for ways to get a break from care giving. what options have you found available, and affordable? 

I am turning mute. It’s better said I was here, than left an impression taken the wrong way.I lost my grandpa on the same day I was going all-in with someone else to start a new family. But, …young hearts play games far too much. Keeping a vow, though, through a Yes means just as much to see how it could’ve worked out. For such an impression left, amounts the silence for an original thought. You know what it’s like to be baptized the day before your partner’s birth? You know how similar you two would be? – If only you met at the right time under different circumstances.  Money Talks 

Finding ways to safely move and socialize can be a good thing for our wellbeing. We lost our father in July, a good friend on Sept 2nd, and have a friend that is terminally ill. On one visit, I had her tossing a pickleball into her pockets of her walker and each time she got it in, she smiled. We were moving and socializing. I’m working on getting a new sport into all nursing homes, schools, and communities that can be played sitting and standing, inside and outside. How could the little tossing of a pickleball into pockets bring joy? Was it movement and socializing? It did create a happy memory... Stay strong!

One of the biggest struggles families face is knowing when it’s time to seek more support. Many wait until a crisis happens before exploring senior care options, which can make decisions feel rushed and emotional. As an Adult Family Home provider, I’ve seen how much peace of mind comes from planning early and understanding the different levels of care available. ❤️

We're glad you're here. Whether you're caring for a spouse, parent, family member, friend, or planning for future caregiving needs, AARP Caregiving Connect is a place to ask questions, share experiences, exchange advice, and connect with others who understand the caregiving journey. Before You Post Please remember that this is a public discussion forum. To help protect your privacy and the privacy of those you care for, please avoid sharing personal information such as: Home addresses Phone numbers Email addresses Financial information Insurance or policy numbers Medical record numbers Other sensitive personal details  When discussing caregiving situations, consider limiting details that could identify you or your loved one. You're Not Alone Caregiving can be rewarding, challenging, emotional, and sometimes overwhelming. This community brings together caregivers from diverse backgrounds and experiences who are willing to share what they've learned and offer support along th

We're glad you're here. Whether you're coping with the loss of a loved one, supporting someone who is grieving, or simply looking for a compassionate community that understands, this forum is a place to share, connect, and find support. Please remember that this is a public discussion forum. While we encourage open and meaningful conversations, we also want to help protect your privacy. When posting, please avoid sharing personal information such as: Home addresses Phone numbers Email addresses Financial information Medical record numbers Other sensitive personal details  Everyone's grief journey is unique, and we ask that all participants treat one another with kindness, empathy, and respect. You're Not Alone We're fortunate to have experienced professionals participating in this community: Amy Goyer (@agoyer), AARP's family caregiving expert, shares insights and resources for caregivers and individuals navigating life's transitions. Jane Cares (@JaneCares), a licensed soc

Disabled daughter living with parents is loosing her mind trying to grasp recent things! Mother just passed, father is very ill w/cancer and I am disabled! Need legal help to protect fathers rights, etc.  How does one help another if they are lost themselves? Since mothers death my health has gotten worse and my father refuses to let me help him, (gets angry and defensive)!  I feel responsible but not allowed any responsibility! Dont want to loose the house as he has worked so hard his entire life, but loss of finances due to mothers death has hit hard!  Anyone who can give any advice...please do! Open to all! iI know there is a God because He has carried me thus far, my faith remains! Thanks!

 This day is the one year anniversary of my husband's death.  It is a beautiful day, and I do wish it were cloudy and raining.  The last of the 'firsts'.