SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

If a deaf child swears in sign language, does his mother wash his hands with soap?

Where do forest rangers go to get away from it all?

If someone with mutiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

At 11:11 a.m. today this will be the reading:

11:11 a.m. on 11/11/11/  

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

    11-11-11

Now it want be here again for 100 years- 

and we  won't be here either - 

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

        Little Johnny ----ROTFL 

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

How do you know when you're staying in a redneck motel?

When you call the front desk and say, "I gotta leak in my sink". And the clerk replies:  "Go ahead."   

Did you hear they've raised the drinking age for rednecks to 32?  They want to keep alcohol out of the high schools.

2 reasons why it's so hard to solve a redneck murder:

1. The DNA is all the same.

2. There are no dental records.

A redneck passed away and left his entire estate to his beloved widow. But she couldn't touch it until she's 14.    

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

 A redneck passed away and left his entire estate to his beloved widow. But she couldn't touch it until she's 14.   

           giggle
 

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

THE MONDAY MORNING MUDDLE...

"I'm retired.... I was tired yesterday, and I'm tired again  today.

We got married for better or worse...he couldn't do better, and I couldn't do worse.

I was always taught to respect my elders...now I don't have anyone to respect.

I asked my wife if old men wear boxers or briefs...she said, depends....... 

I'm so old I no longer buy green bananas.

               HAVE A MARVELOUS MONDAY

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

                MAINE DRIVING ETIQUETTE:

1.   Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles, even if the gun is loaded and the deer is in sight.

2.  When approaching a four-way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires does not always have the right of way.

3.  Never tow another car using panty hose and duct tape.

4.  When sending your wife down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to ask her to bring you back a beer too.

5.  Do not lay rubber while traveling in a funeral procession.     

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

    Maine Driving Etiquette:              

  lol  

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

I was tired yesterday,and I'm tired again  today.   this is sooooo true