"Help me dear," she groans to her husband. The husband calls 911 on his cell phone, talks for a few minutes, picks up his putter and lines up his putt...

His wife raises her head off the green and stares at him.

"I'm dying here and you're putting?" "Don't worry dear, " says the husband calmly. "They found a doctor on the second hole and he's coming to help you."

"Well, how long will it take for him to get here?" she asks feebly.

"No time at all," says her husband. "Everybody's already agreed to let him play through."

B

BonnieC10Author

Community Champion ⭐⭐

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

A golfer teed up his ball on the first tee, took a mighty swing and hit his ball into a clump of trees. He found his ball and saw an opening between two trees he thought he could hit through.

Taking out his 3-wood, he took a mighty swing. The ball bounced back, hit him in the head and killed him...

As he approached the Pearly Gates of Heaven, St. Peter asked, "Are you a good golfer?"

The man replied, "Got here in two didn't I?"

nell2

Contributor ⭐⭐

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

my BonnieC10- thanks

A golfer teed up his ball on the first tee

A good one lol

nell2

Contributor ⭐⭐

In Response to Re: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY- " I didn't know THAT! by J0yce1

thanks-Joyce1

Do you know someone who seems to know everything? LMBO!

thanks-Joyce1

nell2

Contributor ⭐⭐

In Response to Re: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY- " I didn't know THAT! by J0yce1

A good one- Do you know someone who seems to know everything?

Lol

nell2

Contributor ⭐⭐

In Response to Re: SHARE A OKE EVERY DAY by babygreen

babygreen a good one- I

lol J

nell2

Contributor ⭐⭐

In Response to Re: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by babygreen

babygreen a good one

Gosh, I'm rich!

B

BonnieC10Author

Community Champion ⭐⭐

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

A group of friends from church wanted to get together on a regular basis, socialize and play games.

The lady of the house was to prepare the meal.When it came time for Al and Janet to be hosts,Janet wanted to outdo the others.

Janet decided to have mushroom-smothered steak. But, mushrooms are expensive.She then told her husband"No mushrooms. They are to high in cost." "Why don't you go down to the pasture and pick some? There are plenty in the creek bed." he said.

She said, "No, some wild ones are poisonous." He said "Well, I see varmints eating them and they're okay." So she decided to give it a try. She picked a bunch, washed and dried them and smothered her steak. Then gave Ol' Spot (the yard dog) a double handful. Spot ate every bite.

All morning long, Janet watched Ol' Spot and the wild mushrooms didn't seem to effect him. The meal was a huge success.

Later in the evening, a helper lady from town came and whispered in Janet's ear. She said, "Mrs. Williams, Ol' Spot just died." Janet went into hysterics. She called the doctor to tell him what had happened.

The doctor said, "I will call an ambulance and come over as quickly as I can. We will give everyone enemas and pump thier stomachs. Everything will be fine, stay calm."

The EMTs and the doctor came and took each person into the bathroom. After the last was finished the doctor said he believed everyone would be fine.

They were all looking pretty weak, sitting around in the living room, when the helper lady came in and said, "You know, that fellow that ran over Ol' Spot never even stopped!"