SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

                 CHRISTMAS COOKIE RECIPE

1c. water                           1tsp. baking soda

1c. sugar                           1tsp.salt

1c. br. sugar                      lemon juice

4 lg. eggs                          1c. nuts

2c. dried fruit                     1 bottle Jose Cuervo

Sample the Tequila to check the quality. Take a large bowl, check the Cuervo again to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.

Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.

Add one tsp. of sugar. Beat again. At this point it's best to make sure the Curevo is still OK. try another cup just in case.

Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Pick the friggin' fruit off floor. Mix on the turner. If the dried fruit gets stuck in the beaterers, just pry it loose with a drewscriver. Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity.

Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Who givesshz a sheet..Check the José Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table, and a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash the oven.

Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to beat off the timer. Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the Cosé Juervo and make sure tp put the stove in the dishwasher.

CHERRY MISTMAS !   : )

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

CHERRY MISTMAS ! I  I think I will try it- lol 

Jose Cuevro  

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

One beautiful December evening Pedro and his girlfriend Rosita were sitting by the side of the ocean. It was a romantic full moon, when Pedro said, "Hey, Mamacita...let's play Weeweechu."

"Oh no, not now...let's look at the full moon." said Rosita.

"Oh c'mon Baby, let's you and me play Weeweechu. I love you and it's the perfect time." Pedro begged.

"But I wanna just hold your hand and watch the moon."

"Please. Corazoncito, just once.... play Weeweechu with me."

Rosita looked at Pedro and said,"OK, just one time...we play Weeweechu."

So, Pedro grabbed his guitar and they both sang...

"Weeweechu a Merry Christmas....Weeweechu a Merry Christmas...Weeweechu a Merry Christmas....and a Happy New Year."     

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

Bonnie this is a 5 star onelet's play-Weeweechu.

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

God gave the three wise men a star to follow  because He knew...

They wouldn't ask for directions !   

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

As a teacher, Ms. Jones, was very curious about how each of her students celebrated Christmas. She called on young Kathleen.

"Tell me, Kathleen what do you do at Christmas time?" she asked.

"Kathleen addressed the class, "Well, Ms. Jones. Me and my 12 sisters and brothers go to the midnight mass and we sing hymns, then we come home very late and we put mince pies by the back door and hang up our stockings."

"Then all excited we go to bed and wait for Father Christmas to come with all our toys."

Realizing there was a Jewish boy in the class and not wanting to leave him out of the discussion, she asked, "Kevin, what do you do at Christmas?"

Keven replied, "Well, it's the same thing every year. Dad comes home from the office. We all pile into the Cadillac. then we drive to the toy factory. When we get inside, we look at all the empty shelves and begin to sing....

"What friend we have in Jesus. Then we all go to the Bahamas.  "  

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

   God gave the three wise men a star  

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

 students celebrated Christmas( it's cute one)

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK IF:

If you have to go outside to get something out of the fridge...

Your only condiment on the dining room table is the economy size bottle of ketchup...

taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen...

you think Sherlock Holmes is a housing project down in Biloxi...

you prefer car keys to Q tips..    

Your momma has 'ammo' on her Christmas list.  

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

Dear Santa,

I wud lik a kool toy space ranjur for Xmas. Iv ben a gud boy all yeer.

yer frend billy

Dear Billy,

Nice spelling. You're on your way to a career in lawn care. How about I send you a friggin' book so you can learn to read and write? I'm giving your brother the space ranger. At least HE can spell!"

Santa