SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

 A Royal Flush beats a pair, no matter how big they are. "lol   

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

A little girl asks her father....

"Daddy, do all fairy tales begin with 'once upon a time'?"

He replied, "No sweetie, a whole series of fairy tales begin with,  'If elected I promise."     

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

 Bonnie,a  great one-lol love it

 The hotel I'm in has a lovely closet...a nail. 

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

Two guys are drinking in a bar...

1 says, "Did you know that during mating season elks have sex 10-15 times a night?"

"Aw crap !!!" says his friend. "And I just joined the VFW !"    

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

     HAPPY LABOR DAY EVERYONE !  

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

Eleven people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter... 10 were men and 1 woman.

The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one had to leave, because otherwise they were all going to fall.

They weren't able to choose that person, until the woman gave a very touching speech.

She said that she would voluntarily let go of the rope,because as a woman, she was used to giving up everything for her husband and kids in general, and was used to always making sacrifices with little in return,

As soon as she finished her speech.......

All the men started clapping......        

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

I played a great horse yesterday! It took seven horses to beat him...

The horse I bet on was so slow...the jockey kept a diary of the trip.

My horse's jockey was hitting the horse. The horse turned around and said, "Why are you hitting me, there's nobody behind us!"

That was the first time I ever saw a horse start from a kneeling position....

My horse was so late getting home, he tip toed into the stable.

By Henny Youngman

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

                        BUMPAH STICKAHS

Support BINGO..... keep Grandma off the streets.

Good bye tension...hello pension !

I've been diagnosed with CRS...can't remember sh-- !

I'm Retired..

I was tired yesterday,

I'm tired again today.                   

Retirement Planning & Consultants....

Fishmore & Doolittle

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

                          SHORT STORY

Man driving down the road....

Woman driving up the road....

They pass each other and the woman yells out... "PIG !"

The man yells out......

"Bitch!"

The man rounds the curve, hits a pig in the middle of the road and dies .

Thought for the day.....

If men would just listen !    

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

A SIGN FOR YOUR DESK:

This isn't an office.....

It's hell with a flourescent light bulb!