🕯 A Place To Be With OTHERS Who Are Grieving! WE support each other.

May she rest in peace.

👣  1 Step At A Time!

Hi Ms. Nicole I just found this forum....1st I'd like to say thank you for having this for some of us have no one to talk to about our grief/loss  & challenges associated with it !! I'm struggling so very much right now for My mom passed Dec 08th & my birthday was the 6th! We knew she was sick but it was only a matter of week's from being told she's very sick to get family here ASAP if they want to say goodbye! MOM was in Texas & I Maryland I was also having my own medical problem when called & told to get there asap..this is 1 of my hardest challenges/struggles I was unable to get to my mom in Texas to hold her hand & tell her "your baby is here" (for I am -of 7!), to say how grateful I was to of been blessed by her being MY MOMMY!, & to have told her I LOVED HER for the last time..EVER!! The guilt is trying to consume me! I just want her to know how much I love her-ALWAYS, & I hope she can forgive me for not being able to be by her side for her final day's..I was able to talk to her on phone & tell her these things but she was to sick to reply though I think I heard her make a moanish noise in reply?! I'm very grateful other member's of the family was able to go! My other struggle is ..I don't mean to sound like a "bad person"..but I feel I lost my MOM & MY BIRTHDAY! It is no longer my special day all I can think of is it's 2 day's before losing the greatest woman in my life ! I had no idea that I'd also be mourning the loss of "my 1 day a year" that makes me "special" so to speak! I'm blown away by this bothering me I truly didn't even consider it or think it would!! Has anyone out there reading this dealing with this particular situation? How do you "handle" your birthday now? Or em I being over dramatic or over sedative due to loss of mom?! Any helpful advice on either struggle would be BEYOND APPRECIATED! Thank you again for this forum and for LISTENING! I'm truly humbled..

I always thought self care was doing something, like going to the hairdresser or a fitness class. For older folks I think it's taking a break from all those things. That it's OK to sit still for most of the day and let the day take care of itself. Especially if one's energy is waning. I've seen Fruit n Veggies pill on TV. Attempting to swallow those would be dangerous. If they're in gummy form I guess that could be self-care lol. Who needs another problem at our ages? 

I've been struggling with sleep issues the last several days. Little to no sunshine effects me. Doesnt happen often. Grateful for that. Also missing best friend of 50 yrs. It's been almost a year. Sometimes it doesn't seem real that certain people are gone. But it's like he always said, that's the way it goes. And every day is different moving into the future. Every day we move forward.

2 comments (Wednesday 12/20/23 9:44pm ET)

Thank you SO MUCH Marcy @MarcyW882921 for YOUR response to Shannon @ShannonW14183   💙💙💙

Hello to everyone.  Well Nicole it looks like there will be a delay in my moving.  Went to the Rheumotologist yesterday.  Not good news.  I have Rheumatoid Arthritis and a high level of inflammation in my body.  I go for blood test December 26th ( a lot more than the 11 vials they took the first time!).  He is putting me on cortisone shots and wanting to do a vein biopsy and   

 some other tests.  I will delay putting my home on the market until I get the results of all the tests and he said he would put all the information on a disk to be given to the doctor in Idaho.   My son and a friend are taking a truck filled with stuff up to his new home on December 27.  He will then have a moving van load up all his furniture and stuff and take it to Idaho Things didn't quite work out as I planned but it seems as if they never do.  Wishing you and all my friends HAPPY HOLIDAYS.  Mine will be quiet.  Thank You for checking on me.  I hope that Santa is good to you because YOU deserve it. ❤️

Yes Nicole @SummerOnTheWay1 , I have read this book. I will be anxious to see how you like it.

Marcy

Nicole, thank you for all your diligent care and concern, and ❤️ on the forum. I'm sure everyone wishes you well, happy moments during the season, and few or no struggles. Take care!

Thank you Nicole. It's a hopeful topic. I like the idea of looking to the future.