🕯 A Place To Be With OTHERS Who Are Grieving! WE support each other.

[Anonymous]

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***A place to share and support***

Grief & Loss Team 🤎🤗

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[Cadee2719]

Hi Nicole.  Luv You too.  I have been so busy with doctor visits.  I have another one today and one tomorrow.  Seems like I may have an autoimmune disease (unidentified as of now). I am going to an immunologist for more tests.  Always something isn't it?   Seems like it was a good idea to finally take care of "me" after many, many years of taking care of my husband.  As you say so often:  One Step At A Time   

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

👣  1 Step At A Time!

[mc6844]

Glad you had a safe trip to the store. I try to go during non-busy times. But I go when I have the energy. I know that people are impatient when we're slow. Whether on the road or in the grocery. Home delivery is a good option for the heavier items. Take care!

[MarcyW882921]

Nicole @SpringIsHereSoHappy, I'm glad you went on a day other than a Friday and it went well! 🙂

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

👣  1 Step At A Time!

[mc6844]

Food prices have increased $1 to $5 on usual food items I buy. I don't know how families these days cope with increasing food prices.

[mc6844]

I forgot to mention stir-fry. Easy and quick. Cube up protein and keep in freezer to throw in stir-fry. Processed food is not good for elder health. Better to stave off health challenges. 

[mc6844]

Sweet potatoes are a good buy. Good with fish. Or anything. Grainier forms of rice is filling. I soak it in broth etc for flavor and to soften. When I cook I make enough for 2-3 meals and store in freezer. Yogurt ice cream replaces the kind I prefer lol. Turmeric is good for joint pain. I put it on whole grain cereal. 

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

👣  1 Step At A Time!

[mc6844]

I think keeping a journal is an excellent way of working through feelings and emotions. And also expressing one's pain and worries on this forum. It's definitely painful to lose people but expressing it helps to move forward emotionally. 

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

(2 comments/10-3-23) 

☀️🌞  Good Morning Everyone!

As they say ONE STEP AT A TIME and today will be one.

What a NIGHT. Feeling like I didnot sleep although I know I did! 🙄

Oh well, GRATEFUL I have NO need to be driving today and it will be a SELF-CARE DAY. 👍

I do those when I am UNBALANCED like TODAY = exhausted, feeling sorry for myself.....

Hope everyone got some restful zzzz's last night. 💃💃💃

Find your peace today, Nicole 🤗

[mc6844]

I'm sorry about your night Nicole. Every now and then they do happen. I think sometimes we get overwhelmed with things, whatever it is we have to do. Tasks these days take a lot out of me. Just go slow. Feel better! 

[SueS788527]

Hi, Nicole, always good hearing from you even if you are where you are, same as many of us.  I am finding it hard to find that inner peace myself and I also don't wake up fully rested either.  As you said, one day at a time.  We are in charge of our emotions and actions.  I like your idea of a Self-Care Day.  What do you have in mind?  It sounds like a winning way to positively recharge.  Have a relaxing day, your friend, Sue 💞

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

👣  1 Step At A Time!

[MarcyW882921]

I am not a group kind of person, but a widower friend of mine said he had been to a group and found it to be helpful. In addition, my husband was a believer in the group process and used to run his own groups so I thought I would give it a try. I thought the worst that could happen is I wouldn't like it so I would leave and not go back. The people in the group and the group facilitator were so welcoming and nobody put any pressure on me to tell my story, participate, etc. I found it to be a safe place among people who have a common bond of trying to survive a loss. The group will officially end before the end of the year, but the support and friendship will continue.🤗❤️

[SueS788527]

Hi, Marcy, I had a similar experience with trying a grief support group as well.  If the fit is right, which it can be, I totally agree that you can receive a lot of support and comfort in a very safe environment.  That means a lot.  My group, which is sponsored by a local Hospice, is superb and keeps on providing vital support to all of us, even as new members join in.  Everyone is welcome.  We also meet once a month for lunch and that has been a good way to get to know each other and have something to look forward to.  Glad you found your group and that it will continue. Every bit of the right support is critical.  Sue 🍀

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

👣  1 Step At A Time!

[MarcyW882921]

Same to you @SpringIsHereSoHappy! I will be ready for some reading and sleep soon too.

Marcy

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

👣  1 Step At A Time!

[MarcyW882921]

Thanks Nicole @SpringIsHereSoHappy. I think faith is an important component to include for consideration in the mourning process. It can definitely provide a source of comfort and help to put things in perspective. If faith is associated with a faith-based institution, the mourner is also able to gain support and comfort through the clergy members and broader community within the institution.

Marcy

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

👣  1 Step At A Time!

[KM547318]

hello Nichole,

Yes I am approaching a 2 month anniversary and Im still looking to run away to get away from all the memories staying here in this house.  At my age that is ridiculous and probably a death sentence because of all the stress of moving

(plus losing my spouse). My daughter in law was here yesterday and helped throw out things. Is there any place to go to hide from the pain and confusion? Im thinking the outdoors help and maybe thats where I should be- gardening and such.  

Im sorry for all that are dealing with a loss. God helps us and so does this forum.

[mc6844]

I agree about the outdoors. Just getting the air and the sun is such a blessing. Having a little patch of flowers or plants on patio or doorstep. It's an easy to manage diversion. I've moved probably for the last time. Too old to go through that again. And I'm reminded of what I read someplace "wherever you go you take yourself with you." It's what I told my kids. They never liked to hear it. Lol Regarding the decluttering I've already downsized. Gave the kids and their spouses all the stuff. 

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

👣  1 Step At A Time!

[Cadee2719]

Beautiful Nicole.   You are a love. ♥️

[BillH490171]

Good afternoon, hope you all are doing well today.  I went to a grief support meeting last week.  I was the only widower sitting with 6 widows.  They are all inspirational for me.  

The topic of loving someone again came up and several folks mentioned that they could not do that again because of the fear of losing someone again.  After thinking about this notion, it made me sad. 

How does that idea make you feel?

For me, I've got 25 years of great living left and I don't want to go it alone.

Bill

[JenniferB25215]

For me, down the road because he just passed a week ago, but I know i am going to be very lonely and would love someone to be with. My issue is I am well past physical desire, menopause took care of that. How can you look for a partner when you don't want sex...cuddling, sure...but not sex.

[MarcyW882921]

It may sound like an ideal plan for those who are grieving to say they are going to avoid love out of a fear of loss. However, there is a quote when it is read and thought through may bring up some potential issues with the plan.

"To spare oneself from grief at all cost can be achieved only at the price of total detachment, which excludes the ability to experience happiness." --Erich Fromm

We will all work through this in our own way so I think the important thing is how the idea makes you feel. 

Marcy

[BeatleloverKT]

I’ve been married twice. First one ended in 

divorce, second one when he passed. I don’t 

ever want to put my heart out there again. It’s 

been broken too many times, more then I can

count. I have many blessings in my life and

many who I love and love me. Just loving

another man is not in my plans. Best of luck

to you, I hope you find what you’re looking for 

[Cadee2719]

I am at a stage of my life that being married for 61 years was a blessing.  However, I no longer feel that I need a man in my life.  For the first time, I will discover who "I" am.  I always  tease my son saying "I do not wish to train another man."  🤣  You, Bill are young and I think it is important for men to have companionship and a partner to share their life with.    You have to complete your mourning, get emotionally strong again and put yourself out there.  I must admit "out there" is a frightening place in today's society.   I wish you much luck and happiness.