Funny Stories and Life Experiences

YES THEY ARE AMONG US!

My husband and I went through the McDonald's driveway window and I gave the cashier a $5 bill.

Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her 25c.

She said, 'you gave me too much money.'

I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar back.'

She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request.

I did so, and he handed me back the 25c, and said 'We're sorry but we don’t do that kind of thing.'

The cashier then proceeded to give me back 75 cents in change.

Do not confuse the people at MacD's.

We had to have the garage door repaired.

The repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.

I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.

He shook his head and said, 'You need a 1/4 horsepower.'

I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, 'NOOO, it's not. Four is larger than two.'

We haven't used that repairman since...

I live in a semi rural area.

We recently had a new neighbor call the local city council office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road.

The reason: 'Too many deers are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'

Not too BRIGHT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE.

My daughter went to a Mexican fast food and ordered a taco.

She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'

He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked,

'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'

To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'

He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'

The pedestrian light on the corner beeps when it's safe to cross the street.

I was crossing with an 'intellectually challenged' co-worker of mine.

She asked if I knew what the beeper was for.

I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.

Appalled, she responded, 'what on earth are blind people doing driving?!'

She is a government employee.....

When my wife and I arrived at a car dealership to pick up our car after a

service, we were told the keys had been locked in it.

We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver’s side door.

As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked.

‘Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'its open!'

His reply, 'I know. I already did that side.'

STAY ALERT!

They walk among us, they breed, and they vote…....

You now have 2 options...

Delete it…..

or

Send it along to put a smile on someone's face today!.

HAHAHAHAHAHA

@everyone

My folks had a two holer at the family summer cottage. Did you have an experience like at a County, State or National Park

AN ENGLISH MAN'S VIEW OF SELF CHECK OUTS!

To all the Supermarkets and big commercial stores that operate 'Self Check-outs'....... You are heading towards almost exclusively self-checkout now. Yesterday I went shopping at one such store and the lady checking receipts at the exit was stopping everyone.
I didn't choose to participate in that nonsense, I had already filled my trolly, emptied my trolly and scanned the items, refilled my trolly and so I just skipped the exit line and left.
I heard her saying "Umm - Excuse me “ as I kept walking and raised the receipt above my head, leaving the store.
You can either trust me to do self-checkout, or you can put your cashiers back in place like it used to be.
• I'm not interested in proving that I did your job for you.
• If you want me to be a cashier with no training then that's your problem not mine.
• Keep employing young people and give them job opportunities.
YOU DON'T PAY ME TO SCAN MY OWN SHOPPING.
YOU DON’T GIVE ME STAFF DISCOUNT FOR WORKING FOR YOU.
Signed ......All of us
People we need to share this statement its basically about PROFIT to the stores AND putting People out of a JOB....!!!

Meaningful experiences can shape a person’s thinking, alter their perspective, and ultimately mold their character. Ideally, we will learn something from our experiences that allow us to grow, develop wisdom, and ultimately become better people.

TWO HUNTERS HAD RENTED

Two hunters had rented an airplane to get to the distant forest zone. After couple of weeks the pilot returned to take them back. After looking at their hunting trophies he said:
– The plane won’t be able to carry more than one buffalo. You will have to leave one of them.
– But last year the pilot agreed to take on board two buffalos the same size as these,- the hunters protested.
The pilot thought about it and said:
– Ok. If it worked the last year, it should work this time too.
The plane tried to take off with two passengers and two buffalos on board, but it was not able to reach the required height. The plane crashed into the nearest hill. After getting out the plane wreck, the hunters looked around. One of them said to another:
– Where do you think we are?
His pal examined the surroundings and answered:
– I think we are two miles south from the place that we crashed the last time.