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🕯 A Place To Be With OTHERS Who Are Grieving! WE support each other.

Forum|Forum|3 years ago
November 25, 2022
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***A place to share and support***

Grief & Loss Team 🤎🤗

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Underbat

Contributor ⭐⭐

Hello everyone, this thread's purpose is to offer support for those grieving and suffering a loss, wether recent or in the past.

Please keep the thread on topic, and treat EVERYONE with respect.

Please reply in thread to keep it all tidy, and refrain from breaching the guidelines which we expect you all to abide by.

Thanks everyone

C

Cadee2719

Community Champion ⭐

I think sharing thoughts on caring for oneself, making doctor appointments (and the difficulty in doing so), discussing relocating, dealing with finances and life's decisions are all important issues to discuss. These are all a part of being alone and having to make big decisions for ourselves (perhaps for the very first time). Once one "accepts" the reality of being alone, it is difficult to have to make these decisions for ourselves ALONE. Hearing how others do it and have done it has been extremely helpful to me. Accepting the loss is NOT the end of this journey. Listening to tapes and reading books does not always offer the personal touch needed at times. Having someone make us smile and knowing there are people out there that truly do care about you is a gift.

SummerOnTheWay1

📎 SO GLAD EVERYONE IS DOING SELF CARE!!! KEEP IT UP PLEASE. THIS IS YOUR TIME AFTER YEARS (OR LESS) OF BEING A CAREGIVER. ‌👍‌‌👍‌👍

Please UPDATE when you can (anymore appointments? 🤔)

Thanks my friends,

Nicole 🤗🤗🤗

[1] Cadee @Cadee2719 - NOVEMBER appointment.

[2] Jonibee @jonibee - SEPTEMBER appointment.

[3] My bloodwork is JULY 24th. My 6-month Dental Cleaning in AUGUST. My 1st Bone Density in NOVEMBER.

D

DianeB887812

Contributor ⭐⭐

Talking about self care @SummerOnTheWay1 @how are those toes?

SummerOnTheWay1

📎 ANY WEEKEND PLANS?

Weekends I stay in now that I am retired BUT working on some OPTIONS to be ELSEWHERE.

Maybe a Weekend Getaway while I work on moving to a QUIET location which is SAFE & has NATURE to enjoy.

Luv you guys,

Nicole 🤗🤗🤗

D

DianeB887812

Contributor ⭐⭐

Options are:

1. go back to the dog park

2. go see a movie

3. go to the mall

4. take a boat ride to scatter ashes

I retired 10 years ago. But while I was caring for Stephen I was very busy taking him to lots of doctors, doing the shopping or on the phone resolving some problem with medications or appointments Now I’m back to Everyday is a weekend day.

SummerOnTheWay1

📎 Diane @DianeB887812 , what type of MOVIES do you like? 🤔

Luv you,

Nicole 🤗🤗🤗

[*** DIANE wrote: Options are:

1. go back to the dog park
2. go see a movie
3. go to the mall
4. take a boat ride to scatter ashes

I retired 10 years ago. But while I was caring for Stephen I was very busy taking him to lots of doctors, doing the shopping or on the phone resolving some problem with medications or appointments Now I’m back to Everyday is a weekend day. ***]

SummerOnTheWay1

📎 WHAT'S YOUR WEATHER LIKE? 🤔

Here in Cave Spring, Virginia ⛈ getting ready to STORM again. 😭😭😭

Time to dig out my PIG brand water absorbent mats for in front of my front door INSIDE.

Not sure what Mr. 🐈 will be doing, but I WILL be TRYING the huge plastic container for his food on my porch. I would put it UNDER my car during storm but the parking lot has guess what - NO DRAINAGE, so it floods.

Anyway, storms for several days and this OLD lady and the OTHER old lady (2006 Hyundai Elantra) is staying home and INSIDE. Lol, no need to go FLOATING down my hill or cannot come up hill.

Nicole 🤗🤗🤗

D

DianeB887812

Contributor ⭐⭐

I got a little wet this morning at the dog park but the rest of the day was dry. I’m used to hot and humid and I’m getting plenty of that. But mornings are pretty nice. There is an ocean breeze that cools things in the morning and evenings. So it’s just nice typical Florida weather. August is when the real fun starts with the tropical storms. It is supposed to be a busy hurricane season this year. We will see.

SummerOnTheWay1

📎 Diane @DianeB887812 I am totally looking forward to when you get another dog. Do you want male or female or does NOT matter. Puppy, teen or adult?

🐕 Jeremiah (Jack Russell) was my Walking Buddy and Best Pal. Still miss my boy.

I found this on Google, lol - you luv those feisty little dogs. They are SO CUTE and when the time comes, let me know IF you need me to post how to post pictures of him/her.

The Chihuahua is a small dog breed that originated in Mexico. They are known for being intelligent, loyal, and loving. They are also considered to be good companions and lap dogs.

Chihuahuas have a domed skull, large ears, and short muzzles. Their eyes are round and large, and they have a long tail that they carry over their back. Their coats can come in almost any color and pattern.

Chihuahuas can range in temperament from feisty and outgoing to shy and timid.

D

DianeB887812

Contributor ⭐⭐

I had two white chihuahuas up to December of last year. They loved going for walks with me. Everyone that met us along the way were very surprised at how well behaved they were. I got them from a breeder as babies. I had three previous dogs that were mixed breeds and came from the pound. Those dogs all had issues due to their poor experiences in their early lives. I have always loved all my dogs no matter what issues they had, but those two chihuahuas were special to Stephen and I. They were our babies.
I will probably get a fur baby next year. I need to get myself in a good mind set so that I can raise my new puppy without any social issues. Dogs are very sensitive to their owners mental state and can be affected by an unbalanced owner.

SummerOnTheWay1

📎 Marcy @MarcyW882921 you know I am DYING to know about your acupuncture 🤔🤔🤔

Nicole 🤗🤗🤗

M

MarcyW882921

Community Champion ⭐⭐

Nicole @SummerOnTheWay1 ,

I had my third appointment with the acupuncturist on Tuesday. This morning I was awakened at 3:45 with pain that is typically indicative of a whopper migraine to come. I used the acupressure seeds that she placed on my ear, put my heatpack on my head and was able to grab a couple more hours of sleep before it happened again. Here is the great news...I got up, did the seeds again, had breakfast, hung out on the couch for about an hour AND the whopping headache did not materialize!! I am hopeful that this treatment might be working.

Marcy

SummerOnTheWay1

📎 I HOPE so dear Marcy @MarcyW882921 🤗🤗🤗

SummerOnTheWay1

📎 OUR Diane @DianeB887812 stopped by 💃💃💃

Hmmm, a 3:53am ET post = you must have been like me, up when we should be sleeping. 🤔

I luv the dog park idea and SOON we will be hearing about your NEXT furbaby. 👍👍👍

Good luck with releasing his ashes and I seem to remember you mentioning some at the dog park too. Or am I having a Senior Moment? 🙄

Yes, you have to drive for yourself and the OTHER drivers. And I tell my daughter to LET them do their thing even IF she has the RIGHT OF WAY = not worth being shot at. 😱😱😱

Luv you,

Nicole 🤗🤗🤗

D

DianeB887812

Contributor ⭐⭐

My bladder does not let me sleep in sometimes. Once I’m up it’s for the whole day. BIG sigh.

The good news is I got to the dog park. The bad news is it then started raining. So I’ll just have to try again this weekend. The one person I talked with let me know that a lot of familiar faces both two legged and four are waiting at the rainbow bridge. BIG sigh.

In Florida you have to watch out for the Q-tips driving as if no one else is on the road. I think I may have joined their ranks. As time goes by my concentration will get better. Till then I’ll try to be on my best behavior.

And yes a dash of Stephen will go to the park. The grass can always use a bit of fertilizer. 😉

SummerOnTheWay1

📎 How are YOU? 🤔

Lol, I have been up all night!!! 😂🤣

And bet when my 2 alarms (yes, two 🙄) go off at 6am to FEED you know who is when I will be asleep.

It stormed last night and I hope he was under someone's vehicle.

It passed for now and maybe he will surface to sleep as usual on my porch.

Plan for TODAY, last of 4 Dollar Trees hoping this one will have my hair oil or it will be Sally's I guess.

Everyone FIND YOUR PEACE.

Luv you guys,

Nicole 🤗🤗🤗

D

DianeB887812

Contributor ⭐⭐

Good morning speedy. I have now got my car paperwork in my name. That allows me to get a parking sticker for the dog park. Guess where I plan to go today. I just want to say hi to folks that knew Stephen and I and let them know he is gone. I’ll get to pet lots of dogs too.

Next on my list is to take a boat ride off shore and release his ashes into the ocean

That is where Phil went and that is where I want to go. We will all be together. And no matter where friends or family live, they can find their way to a beach and visit us.

On the subject of poor driving habits, while I was driving back and forth to dyalisis treatments and then the hospital and finally the hospice, I ran stop signs and turned when I was not supposed to I can not tell you how many times. And I have never in my life ever been in an accident or gotten a ticket. I just did not have my mind on my driving. Dangerous. I still have to keep watch on myself. My mind wanders and sometimes I look around and have no idea where I am. So I’m staying home as much as possible.

when I was grieving my first husband I had to go back to working after two weeks. I got totally lost on my way to work one morning

So please everyone be carful driving. Sometimes you just have to, but try to concentrate on the driving extra hard. Or better yet get somone else to do the driving for now.

STAY SAFE!!!!

SummerOnTheWay1

📎 Okay, take a seat - chatterbox Nicole is now ready to share her INTERESTING day so far. Lol, had to watch some Garfield then Downtown Abbey to ERASE my RUN THE RED LIGHT moment!!! 😱😱😱

NEVER done this in my 66 years on this planet = NO speeding tickets or accidents. All it took was to be pulled over at age 18 (was speeding, given a warning) in St. Louis, Missouri in my BRAND NEW Honda Civic Hatchback (I bought myself, well car payments through my Credit Union). My 1st real job there was an Outside Hostess at the Steak 'n Shake down the road. I was 16 and walking. Talk about FREEZING my a.s off during the winter. Some serious snow. 😱😱😱 But the TIPS were AWESOME. Yes, we put those metal trays on car windows. In between cars, my b.tt was INSIDE thawing. Lol, how was that for someone who lived on an island for 16 years. NOT FUN. But Ron, my boss was really AWESOME.

Okay, back to my RED LIGHT incident today.

Now keep in mind I KNOW this intersection, been using it since 2018.

SO GRATEFUL I didnot get hit.

I was in the LEFT TURN lane heading to CVS and usually that lane's green ARROW comes on AFTER the other lanes' green does.

Yours truly hits the gas and makes my left turn, NOT even giving it a 2nd thought - while the arrow is still RED.

The only thing that saved me was that the folks moved SLOWLY forward.

Lol, now to see IF there was a CAMERA in that intersection. 🤔🤔🤔

I was so RATTLED after I swore I was STAYING home tomorrow (Thursday) and got gas TODAY. Had planned for tomorrow. I like to keep a FULL tank for those detours through the mountains for accidents and what seems to be chronic roadwork. Fun on 2-lane roads. Yes, those stop, go, slow flag men/women. Hmmm, it is Summer and folks got ice cream trying to get home from Walmart.

Anyway, NO luck at #3 Dollar Tree TODAY, so #4 tomorrow. Yes, going back out. Kind of paranoid now = will I do the same thing again.

🐈 Mr. was a TRIP yesterday!!! Insisting on TRYING to get in bed with me. He had left that alone way back. Lol, interesting what he has planned for today. Yes, Max's vehicle is here and he is nowhere to be found since eating everything in his dish at 6am this morning. Well let's say, took a few trips in and out (had to go see IF Max was home/lol). I finally shut my door to get ready for CVS. I need a Remote Door Opener for his SPOILT self. Geez...

Marcy, oh Marcy @MarcyW882921 👋👋👋

Nicole 🤗🤗🤗

M

MarcyW882921

Community Champion ⭐⭐

Oh my Nicole @SummerOnTheWay1 ! How scary!!

I hope watching your shows helped you to regain your composure. Personally I have always found Downton Abbey to be a great escape!

Marcy

C

Cadee2719

Community Champion ⭐

I loved that show, NEVER missed an episode. Marcy I hope you solve the migraine mystery soon.

SummerOnTheWay1

📎 1 comment ⚠️ DAY 2 [Wednesday 7/17/24 6:57am ET] GLITCH!!!

NO AARP Post Notification Emails TODAY ☹

Hey Team, once in awhile this site has a GLITCH where you will NOT get a COPY of the Grief Forum POSTS.

Hopefully you figured this out (NO post emails in your Email IN BOX).

Lol, I know some of us READ these emails rather than stop by like I do daily.

Luv you ALL,

Nicole 🤗🤗🤗

D

DianeB887812

Contributor ⭐⭐

Aha! It’s a plot to slow my recovery. But they can’t stop me! How is everyone this lovely morning. I had my walk this morning. It is very pleasant in the early morning. Three cute ducklings ran up to me expecting a handout. Someone has been feeding them. That may be a problem when they grow up , but for now they are cute. I’m doing nothing today. I still have a few things left on my to do list but two days of going to Dr appointments whiled me out. Shades of the panic I felt around the many appointments I had to take my husband to. I do not have anymore appointments for two weeks. So I will try to relax and recover. Luv to all especially @summersTooHOT

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