Expert Series: Managing Stress & Anxiety: Q&A with Dr. Barry Jacobs and Dr. Julie Mayer, Live!

@BeverlyH245887 

Hi Beverly,

     That sounds like a terrible experience! You must feel traumatized by it! I am not a physician and can't answer your specific question about the blood transfusion's effect on your immune system. I suggest you contact your primary care provider with your concerns. He or she should be able to give you a better sense of whether or not you are facing greater risks. I wish you luck in recovering physically and emotionally from this medical issue. Take care and stay well, Barry

@m578924d ,

I don't think you are blowing things out of proportion. Your safety is extremely important. I wonder if you'd feel better if you spoke to your employer about their plans for bringing people back. If you learn more about their plan, you may feel like you can handle it. Since you have been able to work from home for over two months, I wonder whether, given your health concerns, you'd be permitted to continue to work from home for a while longer. If it's the transportation you're concerned about, try to think about whether there is a work-around. Do you know someone who can drive you? Can you carpool? Many of us are trying to come up with the safest way to proceed. Sometimes a creative solution can be found. I hope you can find some peace about this. Sleep is so important for the immune system. You need to get a good night's rest.

Wishing you all the best,

Julie

@GloriaR16327 

I'm glad to hear that you are trying your best, but sorry to hear that you are feeling so stressed. I don't blame you. It's a hardship to be apart from your family, and for such a long time. And even more challenging, you are living with someone who isn't so easy to live with. Hair loss can sometimes be a stress symptom and it's possible that you are experiencing that. It might be worthwhile to see a doctor about that though, in case there is some other medical cause.

To manage your stress, I hope you are finding it possible to take some time for yourself, whether it's to take a walk, listen to music, read a book, watch a movie, whatever might take you out of the moment and bring you a little relaxation. I hope you are able to talk with your grandchildren and other family even if you can't see them. These are difficult times. We all need to find ways to cope the best we can.

Julie

@AARPTeri 

Now that things are beginning to open up, we are all struggling with how to feel safe while trying to live our lives during a pandemic. There is no one answer. Each of us has to make our own informed decisions about what feels good enough when it comes to mask wearing, hand-washing and social distancing. At the same time, we must respect the choices and decisions of others. 

Socializing can be a bit challenging when people don't see eye to eye. It makes sense to accommodate the person who prefers the higher level of caution. I think it's easiest to assume that they have reasons for their caution that deserve to be respected, such as a vulnerable family member, an elderly care-receiver, or even a sick family member. When we respect each other's needs and differences, navigating these new limits becomes much easier.

Best,

Julie

@AARPTeri 

This pandemic has caused a lot of grief and fear, but one potential silver lining is that many couples are spending much more time together. Many are feeling closer and more connected than they have in years. What are the secrets to this outcome? Couples feel closer when they share interests, a project, a hobby, exercise, cooking, whatever they both enjoy doing. When couples share their feelings with each other, positive or negative, they feel closer. Talking and taking the time to truly listen to one another helps couples to feel supported and cared for and that leads to a closer bond.

And when one partner feels moody, grumpy or irritable, the other responds with patience, understanding, space if needed, a hug if preferred, but doesn't take it personally. I recommend compassion and forgiveness whenever possible.

Best,

Julie

@AARPTeri 

Many of us live with extended family, whether children, grandchildren, step-children, etc. While we may feel strongly that stay at home orders are for the greater good, some teens may feel that these concerns don't apply to them. Aside from teens often feeling invincible, they also tend to feel especially concerned about their social lives.They're often eager to get out of the home to spend time with their friends. Many are in the developmental stage in which separating from family feels extremely important.  Should families allow teens to decide for themselves how to behave in this pandemic?

Just like you wouldn't hand the car keys to a teen without some discussion of driving safety, before giving a teen the privilege of leaving the home on their own during this time, have a conversation about risks and safety with regard to social distancing, masks and hand-washing. Discuss how their behavior can impact others and help them to understand their responsibility when it comes to protecting their family and friends. When they let you know that they'll behave responsibly, you can give them the opportunity to prove it. And then later, let them know you're proud of their good choices.

Best,

Julie