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DaveMcK
Community Champion ⭐⭐⭐
November 6, 2017

Funny Stories and Life Experiences

  • November 6, 2017
  • 601 replies
  • 500474 views

New topic featuring funny stories. 

This is something to think about when negative people are doing their best to rain on your parade…
So remember this story the next time …

A woman was at her hairdresser's getting her hair styled for a trip to Rome with her husband..
She mentioned the trip to the hairdresser, who responded:
" Rome? Why would anyone want to go there? It's crowded and dirty.
You're crazy to go to Rome. So, how are you getting there?"

"We're taking Continental," was the reply. "We got a great rate!"

Continental?" exclaimed the hairdresser. "That's a terrible airline. Their planes are old, their flight attendants are ugly, and they're always late. So, where are you staying in Rome?"

"We'll be at this exclusive little place over on Rome's Tiber River called Teste."

"Don't go any further. I know that place. Everybody thinks it’s going to be something special and exclusive, but it's really a dump."

"We're going to go to see the Vatican and maybe get to see the Pope."

"That's rich," laughed the hairdresser. "You and a million other people trying to see him. He'll look the size of an ant. Boy, good luck on this lousy trip of yours. You're going to need it."

A month later, the woman again came in for a hairdo. The hairdresser asked her about her trip to Rome.

"It was wonderful," explained the woman, "not only were we on time in one of Continental's brand new planes, but it was overbooked,
and they bumped us up to first class. The food and wine were wonderful, and I had a handsome 28-year-old steward who waited on me hand and foot..
And the hotel was great! They'd just finished a $5 million remodeling job,
and now it's a jewel, the finest hotel in the city.
They, too, were overbooked, so they apologized and gave us their owner's suite at no extra charge!"

"Well," muttered the hairdresser, "that's all well and good, but I know you didn't get to see the Pope."

"Actually, we were quite lucky, because as we toured the Vatican, a Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder, and explained that the Pope likes to meet some of the visitors, and if I'd be so kind as to step into his private room and wait, the Pope would personally greet me. Sure enough, five minutes later, the Pope walked through the door
and shook my hand! I knelt down and he spoke a few words to me.."

"Oh, really! What'd he say?"

He said: “Who screwed up your hair?”

 ‐‐------------------------

601 replies

DaveMcK
DaveMcKAuthor
Community Champion ⭐⭐⭐
November 22, 2019

Posted by Dave the Lighthouse Keeper
LydiaN586309
Community Champion ⭐⭐⭐
November 24, 2019

HOW TO START A FIGHT!

I took my wife to a restaurant.

 

The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.

 

“I’ll have the rump steak, rare, please.”

 

He said, “Aren’t you worried about mad cow?”

 

“Nah, she can order for herself.”

 

And that’s how the fight started…

LydiaN586309
Community Champion ⭐⭐⭐
November 24, 2019

HOW TO START A FIGHT!

My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed.

 

I turned to her and said, ‘Do you want to have sex?’

 

‘No,’ she answered.

 

I then said,’Is that your final answer?’

 

She didn’t even look at me this time, simply saying, ‘Yes..’

 

So I said, “Then I’d like to phone a friend.”

 

And that’s how the fight started…

LydiaN586309
Community Champion ⭐⭐⭐
November 24, 2019

HOW TO START A FIGHT!

My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping channels.

 

She asked, “What’s on TV?”

 

I said, “Dust.”

 

.....And that’s how the fight started…

DaveMcK
DaveMcKAuthor
Community Champion ⭐⭐⭐
November 24, 2019

Posted by Dave the Lighthouse Keeper
DaveMcK
DaveMcKAuthor
Community Champion ⭐⭐⭐
December 1, 2019

Posted by Dave the Lighthouse Keeper
DaveMcK
DaveMcKAuthor
Community Champion ⭐⭐⭐
December 3, 2019

Posted by Dave the Lighthouse Keeper
DaveMcK
DaveMcKAuthor
Community Champion ⭐⭐⭐
December 6, 2019

Not sure why the writer felt the expletives were needed in this!

Posted by Dave the Lighthouse Keeper
DaveMcK
DaveMcKAuthor
Community Champion ⭐⭐⭐
December 7, 2019

 

Pearl Harbor Remembrance Day!

 

Click Link: http://pearlharborevents.com/about/

 

 

Posted by Dave the Lighthouse Keeper
DaveMcK
DaveMcKAuthor
Community Champion ⭐⭐⭐
December 8, 2019

I keep hoping we could get more people posting or giving Kudos to those that do post! 

 

Are you out there!

Posted by Dave the Lighthouse Keeper