SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

What do you call the dead blonde in the closet?

Ans:Last year's winner of Hide n' go seek. 

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

HAPPY LABOR DAY WEEKEND TO ALL !     

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

                          A happy Labor Day to all nell   

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy.

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, "How long have you been bedridden?"

After a look of complete confusion she answered, "Why, not for about twenty years..when my husband was alive."  

Submitted by Dr. Steven Swanson

Corvallis, Or.

I was performing rounds at the hospital one morning and while checking up on a man I asked....   "So how's your breakfast this morning?"

"It's very good except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't seem to get used to the taste", Bob replied.

I then asked to see the jelly and Bob produced a foil packet labeled... KY jelly."

Submitted by  Dr. Leonard Kransdorf

Detroit Michigan

During  a patient's two week follow-up appointment with his cardiologist, he informed me, his doctor, that he was having trouple with one of his medications.

"Which one?" I asked. "The patch... the Nurse told me to put on a new one every six hours and I'm running out of places to put it !"

I had him quickly undress and discovered what I hoped I wouldn't see. Yes, the man had over 50 patches on his body!    

Submitted by Dr. Rebecca St. Clair

Norfolk, Va.

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

Bonnie

What do you call the dead blonde in the closet?

Ans:Last year's winner of Hide n' go seek.

Letter received by Principal of a Wooster Oh high school:

God bless you for the beautiful radio I won at your recent senior citizens luncheon. I am 84 years old and live at the Sprenger Home for the Aged. All of my family has passed away. I am all alone now and it's nice to know that someone is thinking of me. God bless you for your kindness to an old forgotten lady. My roommate is 95 and has always had her own radio, but before I received one, she would never let me listen to hers, even when she was napping.

The other day her radio fell off the night stand and broke into a lot of pieces. It was awful and she was in tears. Her distress over the broken radio touched me and I knew this was God's way of answering my prayers. She asked if she could listen to mine, and I told her to kiss my ass.

Thank you for that opportunity.

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by nell2

An American and his ever-nagging wife went on vacation to Jerusalem  While they were there, the wife passed away. The undertaker told the husband, "You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here, in the Holy Land , for $150."   The American thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home.  

The undertaker asked, "Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your wife home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would spend only $150?"

The man replied, "Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead.  I just can't take that chance .

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

In Response to WHERE TO SAFELY INTERN THE NAGGING WIFE'S BODY by Hal

Good ones Hal....A good weekend to you!  

In Response to RE: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY by BonnieC10

I have been to a lot of places, but I've never been to Cahoots. Apparently you can't go alone, you have to be in Cahoots with someone...

I've also never been in Cognito either. I hear no one recognizes you there. I have, however, been in Sane. They don't have an airport , you have to be driven there. I have made several trips thanks to my family and friends.

I would go to Conclusion, but you have to jump, and I'm not much at physical activity.