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WalkingWoman
Contributor ⭐
May 7, 2026

Where to begin...

  • May 7, 2026
  • 2 replies
  • 1561 views

Three adult stepchildren were pushing for burial of their father's ashes last winter.  I was dealing with taxes, estate, paperwork, paperwork, paperwork!  So I gave oldest stepdaughter the ashes, deed to the cremation garden plot I had bought, and plans for memorial stone, a work in progress, information about her father's military service and paperwork that I had already done on that.  I had informed all three of  progress as the process unfolded.

 

A couple of weeks ago I received an email, "Good News, Dad's ashes will be buried next Thursday but not in the plot you bought.  We chose a different plot.  Hope you can come."

 

I did go, and right, not the plot I had chosen which was for both of us.  This plot is only for one, and the plaque is the basic military plaque, with only his name, branch of service and DOB, DOD.  Married 44 years. Primary caregiver for last 2 years.

    2 replies

    SereneSeagull
    SereneSeagull
    Community Champion ⭐⭐⭐
    May 7, 2026

    I’m sorry that happened.  I’ve seen and heard this many times with others, unfortunately if no legal wishes drawn.  And even when there may be, some family members just go and do whatever.   That’s a heartbreaking ache.  I’m so sorry.  Very wrong that was done in my opinion.  

      A
      AngleS694104
      Contributor ⭐⭐
      May 7, 2026

      That’s honestly really rough, especially after 44 years together. I’d keep copies of every document and plot agreement though - family stuff around estates can get messy way faster than people expect.

       

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