Chronic traumatic grief
This is what I suffer from....on top of being dx with PTSD. The losses are not the cause of the PTSD....
It started with losing my middle daughter at 21 in a horrific car accident...took me 25 years to fully grieve her loss...Between losing my daughter and my second husband on her birthday 13 years later at 54 to lung cancer....I lost my only sister to suicide....and 3 of my closest friends of life....when my husband passed so young I found myself really alone....I tried everything, nothing worked for long....My first husband and I always remained friends since we dated 4 years before we married and had a very tight bond, and my second husband and him liked each other...so when my second husband passed, my first became closer and closer as we used to be...just the friendship , not the relationship...He was a Viet Nam vet who had PTSD when he went in the service and of course Nam made it worse..by 40 his drinking escalated...at one point I couldn't live his life and he couldn't live mine...but we always maintained the frienship....and became closer that we had ever been...he passed last July, I was his caregiver, POA and made all medical decisions...it was all very quick...we knew we loved each other...I can't seem to get it together....I am grieving my teen years with him, his comfort and friendship, he was the father of all 3 of my daughters and the fact that he was the last part of my daughter I had since he was her father....I cry everyday....I miss what was, what could have been....all the deaths I've suffered except my daughters have never taken this much out of me and I am lost...thank you to all who have read this...Angel