Caregiving Connect

    An excerpt from Barry J. Jacobs:    Frequent change is unsettling to anyone. But the most capable caregivers are generally those who are creative problem-solvers in the face of change — that is, they don't depend so much on the care regimens they've carefully devised as on their capabilities to adapt and readapt to meet new challenges. As this national health crisis unfolds, caregivers should lower the standards for timeliness (say, having your loved one dressed by 10 a.m. instead of 8 a.m.) and meticulousness of care (teeth brushed after every meal) that they may have carefully crafted over time and, like a jazz musician who uses a familiar melody as a jumping-off point for artistic exploration, improvise something fresh and new.

A quick and easy way to make a glass tumbler or container no-slip is to place rubber bands around the outside to help the hand get a better grip.  

  An excerpt from Barry J. Jacobs:    Meditation comes in many types but has three common elements — deep breathing, focused concentration, and an increased, not decreased, awareness of what is going on inside and outside of us at any given moment. It has been shown to ground the family caregivers who regularly practice it in the present — rather than worrying about the future or regretting the past — and create a greater sense of calm.   In a paradoxical way, meditation is a way to regain a feeling of control. Feeling calmer and more fully aware of the present creates greater acceptance of its current circumstances. That greater acceptance creates a different sense of control, one that's based on handling what is, and not fretting about what isn't. Caregivers who can endure this pandemic and trust that they are doing their utmost — with its limitations — will be more clear-headed, content and effective.

  Ever try this for your loved one? Place post-it around the house for reminders on daily activities.

  Need help finding local resources during the Pandemic...check out this resource that AARP is offering. You can get the contact information you need by state!    

During the pandemic here are some tips on maintaining your personal safety and self-care...   • In order to be safe and stay healthy, limit contact with visitors, stay in as much as you can and continue to follow guidelines from the CDC. While most of us are very focused on the person we are caring for, it is essential to also care for yourself.   • For high risk individuals, such as those with dementia and underlying health conditions, consider having the primary caregiver self-isolate with the care recipient.   • Make sure to have a back-up plan should you get ill as the primary caregiver.

• Isolation is a huge issue as we begin to follow the social distancing guidance from the CDC. Set up communication using a variety of technology with your loved one and your team – FaceTime, Google Home, Skype, smart speakers, or simply phone and text.   • Check with the facility your loved one is in to see if they have made accommodations for online visits using technology and how they plan to communicate with families.   • As an alternative, send in cards, letters, magazines, puzzles or other items you know your loved one would be happy to get! Talk with your facility management about the safest way to deliver items.

During the times of COVID-19 and in possibly in general it is important to have the following in mind:   • Make sure you have a list of medications, medical contacts, and important information. If there are upcoming routine medical appointments, reschedule those or switch to a virtual visit.   • We recommend having an extra 30-day supply of essential medications on hand. Don’t forget over-the-counter medications like cough suppressants and fever reducing drugs like acetaminophen.

Determine how much food, medication, and basic supplies the person you’re caring for has on hand. We recommend, if possible, having a 2-week supply of the following items: food, water, house cleaning supplies, and medical supplies/equipment.

During these difficult times it is important to exhaust all your resources in a collective effort. Here are some suggestions:   1. Put together a list of individuals in your family or friend network and services in your community that can help you perform some key caregiving tasks.   2. Find out if services such as Meals on Wheels can help deliver meals, or if there are other local services to help with food or medication delivery.    

Last week, AARP launched a brand new Community Connections site.   The purpose is to offer steps to find or give help during the coronavirus pandemic. The website enables you to join or organize your own online mutual aid group to stay connected during this time.    Let us know what you think!

If your loved ones lives in a nursing home, assisted living, group home, senior community etc, and they are on "lockdown" and not allowing any visitors, this is still a time for you to advocate for your loved ones. Two key things: Make sure you know whether those facilities have taken precautions that are needed to ensure loved ones’ safety Insist on some type of line of communication - FB posts with photos; telephone calls; videos; photos; video chats like Skype, Facetime, What's app Facilities are obligated to give you regular updates about your loved ones' condition and the condition of other residents and the general facility condition. Some questions to ask: Are residents being kept separate or are they gathering for meals, activities etc.? How is the facility being cleaned - are extra measures being taken? In the absence of group activities, what 1:1 activities are taking place to keep residents stimulated, connected Can you drop of things for your loved ones? Food, supp

I work in a small rural hospital in the primary care clinic as a social worker and therapist. In one week's time, the way we deal with patients has changed RADICALLY. I don't know if your doctor's clinic is taking the same steps as ours is, but, just in case, here's what YOU might experience, along with tips on what YOU might want to do to protect yourself, your loved one, and other people:   1. Don't come down to the clinic without calling first. Many doctors' practices are radically limiting the number of patients who are present at one time. This means keeping the waiting rooms as free of people as possible. Instead of having you or your loved one come into the office, your question or issue may be dealt with over the phone, or with something called 'telemedicine', which involves using your smart phone or computer to be 'seen' by a nurse, primary care provider, or specialist. By calling the doctor's office and speaking with the nurse or medical assistant, you might not have to

Check this out! AARP offers a webinar for explanations on how to utilize ridesharing apps to your advantage. Sign up! https://onlinexperiences.com/scripts/Server.nxp?LASCmd=AI:4;F:QS!10100&ShowUUID=7008DFF9-052A-4803-BEDF-5AEA3166031B&CMP=EMC-EDO-DIS-ACQ-ADS-FEB_RIDESHARE_H1C2-861200-1262703-02192020_Hero_IMG-4380687&encparam=fAuJtJe3UG3cHn/Cw2NvqEKrtMvPegxr7mlvTH/G/TU=

Is there any services for getting a ramp built on a home? We can’t afford to ask a contractor to do this.

My siblings are not involved but I’m worried that they’ll accuse me of some sort of selfish spending of my parents’ money. How can I protect myself against their accusations?

Is there any way to help a person who must use a wheelchair get out into the forest to experience the greenery, safely?

My husband, who has Parkinson’s, is getting really bored. What ideas are there to pass the time?

I’m afraid to cut the toenails of my father as they are very thick. What’s the safest way to do this?

Medicare doesn’t cover transportation unless it’s a medical emergency, apparently. I can’t afford to pay for a taxi or van to take my mother around. What other options are there?

Complete a “Five Wishes” advance directive with your loved one, and don’t worry about a separate “Living Will”, because those end of life questions are included in the Five Wishes.  Once it is completed, you only need 2 witnesses who are not related to the care recipient. Then photocopy and make sure every interested member of the family gets a copy, as well as the main health providers involved in their care.

If your loved one is using a credit or debit card irresponsibly, and can’t remember what they’ve bought, try giving them cash, say $100, and help them go shop so they can enjoy the experience and have some control. If you can stop online shopping, or buying from TV shopping channels, their savings will go a lot farther.

If your loved one wants to go on a brief vacation, engage one of your family members who don’t usually help out. The brief experience of caregiving over a long weekend will open their eyes to what you’re doing, and the care recipient will most likely deeply enjoy having two people with them for their adventures

If your local Agency on Aging seems to complicate to talk to on the phone, go visit your local senior center, and find out who can give you some time to explain their services. You might need to make an appointment to come back later, but you’ll find that you’re ‘picking the brain’ of someone who really knows your community and can link you to the services you need.

People with dementia can be trained just like a toddler or an animal: reward good behavior and distract from bad behavior. I’ve found that talking with my therapist about my reactions to my Dad’s angry and mean words helps me to find a way to be calm, not take it personally, and find ways to either safely leave the situation (to discourage more verbal abuse) or distract him with something pleasant, like suddenly putting on a Glenn Miller piece of music (his favorite.)