Do’s and Don’ts for Caregivers at the Holiday Dinner Table - #1

Don’t say: “Why aren’t you helping out with Mom more?” 

An axiom of family therapy is that “you” statements (“You don’t treat me well,” for example) have an inherently accusatory tone and are almost always guaranteed to provoke a defensive reaction or host of excuses. Few stubborn brothers will respond positively and step up. At the same time, this question is too broad. Requests should be more specific and tailored to the sibling’s availability and capabilities.

Excerpt by Barry Jacobs