🕯 A Place To Be With OTHERS Who Are Grieving! WE support each other.

[Anonymous]

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***A place to share and support***

Grief & Loss Team 🤎🤗

📸clipart attached📸

[Cadee2719]

Marcy, Thank You for your continued support.  

[SummerIsTooHOT]

👣  1 Step At A Time!

[mc6844]

It's not easy to balance a diet for those aging, or just trying for better health. Maybe Medicare can give resources to a nutritionist. For easy meals for those grieving or don't feel like eating much.

[SummerIsTooHOT]

1 comment (Sunday 11/12/23)

Thanks for stopping by Marcy @MarcyW882921 💙💙💙

Hmmm, soon we will have to plan a road trip to visit OUR Cadee @Cadee2719 in Idaho. 😎

Luv you,

Nicole 🤗

---

✏@MarcyW882921 wrote:

Cadee @Cadee2719,

You made it through a very difficult week and did it in your own way. The feelings won't disappear, but you live on with all of your fond memories.

Now you are expressing excitement about the changes on your horizon. You have put all of the repair work in on your current home so that leaves the packing to do. It's great that your son has sold his home and has a closing on his new home. You made the trip to Idaho and found three potential communities for you and that's terrific. You have a doctor's appointment scheduled in December and soon you will be near your brother in a place where you will feel safe again. 

I am so happy for you and impressed with all that you have accomplished!👏🙂

Marcy✏

---

[Cadee2719]

The door is always open for you guys!  ❤️

[SummerIsTooHOT]

👣  1 Step At A Time!

[jonibee]

I received this from the Hospice site that my husband had before he passed and it's worth sharing ..Poetry by someone who had lost a love one....:"Grief is like a river" by Cynthis G Kelly . I found it very meaningful....

"My Grief is like a river....I have to let it flow...But i myself determine..Just where the banks will go..Some days the current takes me..In waves of guilt and pain, But there are always quiet pools..Where I can rest again. I crash on rocks of anger..My faith seems faint indeed, But there are other swimmers..Who know what I need. Are loving hands to hold me..When waters are too swift, And someone kind to listen..When I seem to drift. Grief's river is a process..Of relinquishing the past, By swimming in Hope's channels..I'll reach the shore at last...

Cynthia G. Kelly

Source of poetry: ..Pathways for Grief & Loss..305 Carpenter Road Fort Collins, CO 80525

[SummerIsTooHOT]

1 comment (Sunday 11/12/23)

Happy BELATED Birthday dear sweet and strong Cadee!!! 🎂

And YES, it is a NEW beginning for YOU = older and WISER. 👍

Wow, you have been BUSY! 😱

So I am guessing that the NEXT step is to SELL your house? 🤔

SO GOOD hearing from you my friend.... 💃💃💃

And you stay in my prayers and thoughts for your NEXT doctor's appointment. 💙🙏

SO PROUD OF YOU!!!!

Luv you,

Nicole 🤗

---

✏@Cadee2719 wrote:

Good I guess I fixed whatever the problem was.  I will repeat my post.  Thank You Nicole for your love and care.  The one year anniversary was hard for me.  I am in the process of designing my husband's gravestone.  On that day I went and put flowers on my husband and son's graves, but it was such a lonely feeling.  My son sold his home here and we flew to Idaho where he purchased a beautiful new home.  It closes the end of this month.  I found three communities that I am interested in purchasing my home in.  I saw elderly women walking their dogs, children getting off the school bus and WALKING to their homes (all things that can't be  safely done here).  I am looking forward to the move and know I have A LOT of work ahead of me.  I also got an appointment with the rheumatologist 12/21.  I hope he can solve the problem of the pain in my legs.  My birthday was yesterday and it seems as if I will have a NEW BEGINNING, a rebirth.  I am Thankful.✏

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[mc6844]

Cadee, that is nice!

[SummerIsTooHOT]

1 comment (SUNDAY 11/12/23)

Hi Cadee @Cadee2719 , I use an Android to post.

What are YOU using? 🤔

Luv you,

Nicole 🤗

---

✏@Cadee2719 wrote:

I am not sure why what I am posting is not showing.  Something has changed on this site for me and I am not sure what it is.  This is a test post to see if it goes through.✏

---

[Cadee2719]

I am using my computer.  It seemed like I had to sign in again over and over for them to allow me access to post.  It seems to be working now.  It kept saying I was not authenticated??

[SummerIsTooHOT]

1 comment (Sunday 11/12/23)

I AM THINKING OF YOU TODAY! 💙💙💙

Daniel @DanielH122653 

[DanielH122653]

TThank You

[SummerIsTooHOT]

2 Comments (Sunday 11/12/23)

 I AM THINKING OF YOU TODAY! 💙💙💙

Cadee @Cadee2719 

[Cadee2719]

Good I guess I fixed whatever the problem was.  I will repeat my post.  Thank You Nicole for your love and care.  The one year anniversary was hard for me.  I am in the process of designing my husband's gravestone.  On that day I went and put flowers on my husband and son's graves, but it was such a lonely feeling.  My son sold his home here and we flew to Idaho where he purchased a beautiful new home.  It closes the end of this month.  I found three communities that I am interested in purchasing my home in.  I saw elderly women walking their dogs, children getting off the school bus and WALKING to their homes (all things that can't be  safely done here).  I am looking forward to the move and know I have A LOT of work ahead of me.  I also got an appointment with the rheumatologist 12/21.  I hope he can solve the problem of the pain in my legs.  My birthday was yesterday and it seems as if I will have a NEW BEGINNING, a rebirth.  I am Thankful.

[Cadee2719]

I am not sure why what I am posting is not showing.  Something has changed on this site for me and I am not sure what it is.  This is a test post to see if it goes through.

[SummerIsTooHOT]

1 comment (Saturday 11/11/23)

Thanks Marcy @MarcyW882921 💙💙💙

Lol, I got OFF the Rollercoaster and STAYED OFF when I got up to make my MUCH NEEDED coffee. ☕

I am now getting ready to RETURN to my bed (stayed out of it ALL DAY 💃💃💃).

Girl, that is my SLEEP AID/lol 😂🤣

Gertrude is a HOT MESS!!! 😎

It is a series of audiobooks the author is sharing. GRATEFUL 🙃

SO GOOD hearing from you. Hey, kitchen finished? 🤔

Luv you,

Nicole 🤗

---

✏@MarcyW882921 wrote:

Nicole @SummerIsTooHOT ,

I'm sorry about your roller coaster day. I hope there were at least more ups than downs. Why not listen to that book that excites you any time you want? When you are retired you have so much more flexibility in the timing of things you like to do! 

Marcy✏

---

[MarcyW882921]

Nicole @SummerIsTooHOT ,

I'm glad you got off the roller coaster and stayed out of bed today! Sometimes it's fun to read about someone else who is a hot mess to take your mind off what you might be feeling.

The kitchen remodeling is done and I am waiting for a table. I didn't think I needed one, but someone who has been helping me with the project felt it was needed. The delivery was delayed and I was finally able to schedule it for next Saturday. I have reservations, but hope it works out the way this person envisioned it. 🤨

Marcy

[SummerIsTooHOT]

👣  1 Step At A Time!

[Therapist4u]

Hi Nicole! 😀

You mean like this kind of  EMOTIONAL ROLLERCOASTER😄

EMOTIONAL ROLLERCOASTER LOL!

 LOL!🙃🤣

Take care!  🍂🍁🍂☮️  ~Allen 🌈 🍂🍁🍂

[SummerIsTooHOT]

1 comment (Saturday 11/11/23 1:30pm EST)

Dear Kim @KimberlyM389662 , I am TAGGING both AARP Expert Jane @JaneCares and AARP Expert Amy @agoyer to see IF they are ONLINE now.

Luv you,

Nicole 🤗

---

✏@KimberlyM389662 wrote:

Nicole, 

I am in such a funk and can't get out of it. I feel like such a failure on everything. There are things that I have to do now with my son that has made me realize that it is things he did with his Dad and it makes me so sad that my son will never get to do those again. Social security is messing around with my son's benefits. 9 months ago I had his interview to switch his SSI over to SSDI to collect benefits under his Dad and it's still not completed. I was given a number to call my local congressman to get involved which is what I had to do last year to get my disability reviewed and of course they denied me. It's been resubmitted and per the lawyer my husband's death helps me. They have only processed 35% and it says it generally takes a year. I am going down a rabbit hole and feel like everything is closing in on me. Not sleeping well, anxiety induced panic attacks and after this month I won't be able to pay my bills. I worked so hard to keep a good credit score which is now going into the crapper. I need someone to help me and tell me it's going to get better. ✏

---

[agoyer]

@SummerIsTooHOT  @KimberlyM389662 

Kimberly I'm so sorry you are in such a fix. And dealing with this while you are grieving - it's so hard. My heart goes out to you. I'm so sorry for your loss.

The length of time it takes for these things is so frustrating! I do think it's a good idea to call your Member of Congress and get them to help you. I know you said you did that for yourself but you were denied, and it's a good idea to do this now for your son. 

You said you were working with a lawyer - that's a good thing, what is the lawyer doing to help you? Good lawyers can help the process go more smoothly and possibly faster. What advice is the lawyer giving? 

Here are some resources that may be helpful. 

Find free financial counseling:

• Financial Counseling Association of America Or call 1-800-450-1794 
• The Foundation for Financial Planning has some free education resources but also has info about how to talk to a free financial expert. They also have some great worksheets and other tools. 
• Some banks or credit unions offer free financial counseling - you might contact yours and ask if they offer any support. 
• Advisors Give Back is a non-profit in which financial advisors offer free expert advice. 
• The Financial Planning Association also has a pro bono program for free expert advice.
• I know you are concerned about being able to pay your bills. I'd urge you to contact your utility companies (gas, electric, internet, etc.) and tell the you are struggling and ask if they have any programs to help - some offer discounted services, deferred payments, etc. 

Supplement your income and help pay for expenses by applying for other public benefits:

• Be sure you have also signed up for any other benefits you might be eligible for (and they may go faster that Social Security does). For example, LIHEAP (low income home energy assistance program) helps people with low incomes pay their heating and electric bills. AARP has these free public benefits state fact sheets for every state and you can see about how to apply in your state, who to contact, etc. You might qualify for SNAP (food and nutrition benefits), TANF (Temporary Assistance for Needy Families) or other benefits as well. Have you applied for Medicaid?

Use a food bank:

• Remember that you can go to a Food Bank to get food - every little bit of money that is saved can help! Feeding America has a tool to help you find local food banks. There is no shame in utilizing a food bank when you need it. They exist for people who are in tough situations and you definitely qualify for that! 

I hope some of these things will lead you to more support and financial assistance! 

Take care,

Amy Goyer, AARP Family & Caregiving Expert

Author, Juggling Life, Work and Caregiving

[SummerIsTooHOT]

2 comments (11/11/23) 👋 Saturday Chat!

How are you TODAY/TONIGHT? 🤔

Me, kind of an IFFY day = rollercoaster day! 🙄

Earlier, was thinking of staying IN BED ALL DAY, but did get up to make some much needed coffee. ☕

So far, have NOT climbed back into bed.... 💃💃💃

Totally EXCITED that the YouTube Channel I SUBSCRIBE to just posted a NEW audiobook. Cannot wait for BEDTIME tonight to listen to it. 👍

"Gertrude, Gumshoe: Slam Is Murder | Cozy Mystery Audiobook" on YouTube.

Okay, let me cut this short and hit post as I see OUR Kim @KimberlyM389662 just posted. 💙💙💙

Find YOUR peace,

[MarcyW882921]

Nicole @SummerIsTooHOT ,

I'm sorry about your roller coaster day. I hope there were at least more ups than downs. Why not listen to that book that excites you any time you want? When you are retired you have so much more flexibility in the timing of things you like to do! 

Marcy

[KimberlyM389662]

Nicole,

I can't do the audio books. My daughter does in the car on her way home from work. My neighbor also. Me, I'm old school. I do read books on my Kindle it's not the same as actually feeling the weight of the book. Also, the gratification of actually turning the page with my hand. I have been reading a series of books about one specific person. I have been reading him since 1992 I just got the new book but, I have not been able to focus on reading. My therapist and my psychiatric nurse practitioner put me on a new medicine to help me focus but it hasn't had enough time to reach the plateau that I need to be able to.

[SummerIsTooHOT]

1 comment (Friday 11/10/23)

Marcy @MarcyW882921 , OUR Jonibee @jonibee INSPIRES me NOT to GIVE UP!!!

Through all of this, SHE is "functioning" - gosh, I would be laying in a Hospital Bed DEMANDING stuff = I am a BIG BABY. My daughter is like dear sweet strong Jonibee.

Luv you BOTH,

Nicole 🤗🤗

---

✏@MarcyW882921 wrote:

Jonibee @jonibee.

Thinking of you and I'm sorry that you are having to deal with all of these kicks while you are already down. I guess all you can do is follow doctor's orders that seem to be prioritizing what is the most crucial at this time. I hope the medication does what is is expected to do without adding any additional complications.

Marcy✏

---

[MarcyW882921]

Nicole @SummerIsTooHOT ,

I love Jonibee's @Jonibee fighting spirit and that she inspires you. Those are things we all need!

Marcy

[SummerIsTooHOT]

2 comments (Friday 11/10/23)

👣  1 Step At A Time!

The day will come when you can remember your loved one WITHOUT PAIN.

[KimberlyM389662]

Nicole, 

I am in such a funk and can't get out of it. I feel like such a failure on everything. There are things that I have to do now with my son that has made me realize that it is things he did with his Dad and it makes me so sad that my son will never get to do those again. Social security is messing around with my son's benefits. 9 months ago I had his interview to switch his SSI over to SSDI to collect benefits under his Dad and it's still not completed. I was given a number to call my local congressman to get involved which is what I had to do last year to get my disability reviewed and of course they denied me. It's been resubmitted and per the lawyer my husband's death helps me. They have only processed 35% and it says it generally takes a year. I am going down a rabbit hole and feel like everything is closing in on me. Not sleeping well, anxiety induced panic attacks and after this month I won't be able to pay my bills. I worked so hard to keep a good credit score which is now going into the crapper. I need someone to help me and tell me it's going to get better. 

[MarcyW882921]

From your lips Nicole @SummerIsTooHOT !

🤗❤️