🤗 WE are thinking of YOU! Please Stop By To See Us :)

[Anonymous]

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WE cry, rejoice, talk, share!

Whatever YOU need, WE are here for YOU.

***YOU are a very SPECIAL person and WE want to hear from YOU***

Grief & Loss Team 🤗

[mc6844]

Also Nicole, thank you for all the kudos! I appreciate the time and care.

[CarolD435501]

I still cry.do not feel special....I know I was special  to my Husband Loss him 4-15-23,,,Now I feel nothing..Lord is with me I know   and do not know how  long My loss will effect me....I pray for all.of us...... 

[mc6844]

How are you Carol? Please drop by and let us know. Thank you!

[MarcyW882921]

Dear @CarolD435501 , It is very normal to still cry. I do too and I just passed the nine month anniversary. I think it's important to watch for things that may signal that professional help is needed. Is the crying constant? Are you doing routine things (eating, bathing, getting dressed, caring for your home, etc)? Are you engaging in hobbies or activities of interest? Are you communicating with family/friends? I could go on but you get the idea.

It sounds like you have a spiritual connection and that is a good thing. So now you are special to your husband (because you are with him and he is with you) and you feel the Lord's presence so you are special in that sense too. How about being special to family or even to yourself? Sometimes we must look and search a little deeper to see things through our grief.

Your loss will always be a part of you. Your husband was and is a significant part of your life that you won't forget. We would love to go back to that life we had with our loved one, but we can't. A book I read recently Different after You: Rediscovering Yourself and Healing after Grief and Trauma talks about going through a birth at the moment of our loved one's passing and it's not a pretty birth. The loss makes us a different person whether we like it or not, but the good thing is we can decide what our new person will be.

Know that you are special CarolD!

[Cadee2719]

This site recommended the book "WIDOW TO WIDOW" by Genevieve Davis Ginsburg which I found very helpful.  I read it shortly after I lost my husband but really didn't absorb it.  I have recently re-read it and find it very helpful.  It has been 8 months since I lost my husband, son and brother and will admit to having a day or two of not crying.  Grieving is a process and has no deadline.  Each person is different, but we all must realize is that we are ALIVE and are entitled to make the best of this new life.  This site has become "family" to me and has helped me in more ways than I could count.  Just remember:  One Step At A Time  We are here for you.

[BeatleloverKT]

@CarolD435501 You are having a tough

time. Please know you are special. It is

hard to see that when you’re grieving.

Are you getting any help or support?
Reading a book? Lots of choices out there. Seeing a grief counselor? Finally,

maybe get a well visit at your Dr just

to make sure everything is okay.

Thinking of you and hoping things 

get better soon 💜

[mc6844]

Beatle how are you doing today? Please drop by and let us know. Thank you!

[SummerIsTooHOT]

One Step At A Time 🤗

[RalphS482406]

Hi Nicole, lonely, nosey AARP member here. I'll take your trash to the dumpster.

[SummerIsTooHOT]

One Step At A Time 🤗

[RalphS482406]

---

@SummerIsTooHOT wrote:

(8/4/23) WE cry, rejoice, talk, share!

Whatever YOU need, WE are here for YOU.

***YOU are a very SPECIAL person and WE want to hear from YOU***

Grief & Loss Team 💚🤗

---

Hello, AARP member, I lost my family and look for AARP members as friends. I support AARP foundation.

[Cadee2719]

Welcome Ralph.  You have a new family here.  I, too, lost three members of my family and this site and the loving people here have helped me day by day.  There is no time limit for grieving.  Each person is different.  What is important is that you take a small step EACH day moving forward.  Some days you take one step forward and two back but you just keep trying.  It has been 8 months for me and I can say that there are actual days that I am not crying.  Grieving is a process.  I have felt guilty that my husband, son and brother died within months; why not me?  This site taught me that I AM ALIVE, and am entitled to making the best of it.  You are not alone Ralph.  Welcome to the Family!

[SummerIsTooHOT]

One Step At A Time 🤗

[Cadee2719]

YOU have made my Friday!  I am SO GLAD that you are back.  Luv ya.

[SummerIsTooHOT]

One Step At A Time 🤗

[BeatleloverKT]

Thank you for all the kudos!! Sleep well 💜😴

[SummerIsTooHOT]

One Step At A Time 🤗

[Cadee2719]

I woke up this  morning and saw the emails from you.  I thought "That is not my Nicole!!!! is it?"  I quickly went to the Grief & Loss site and YES IT IS!!!!!!!!  I am writing this between crying and laughing.  I am so HAPPY that you have returned to us.  You have put so much time into this site with all your love, care and devotion.  I felt that YOU were the GLUE that held me together along with many others.  Thank You for coming back to us.  

[SummerIsTooHOT]

One Step At A Time 🤗

[MarcyW882921]

Celebrate @SummerIsTooHOT the benefits of being 65. You have earned them! Finding a doctor and dentist are positive steps toward taking care of yourself so good for you!

Marcy

[SummerIsTooHOT]

One Step At A Time 🤗

[BeatleloverKT]

So glad to see you back @SummerIsTooHOT  I knew you would return! 💜

[jonibee]

I have had a little hiccup in my life with health issues and are addressing them to get back to healthy again..I find that i fall off the wagon eating wise when I get anxious...I am addressing things that have to be fixed around the house and sometimes that along with the day to day running of it can be over whelming..So take it one day at a time and one step at a time..no need to rush unless it's a major issue...I find that there are days when one slips back emotionally and I let the tears flow and go on from there..I still have to find that inner source of strength some days to get things done. Otherwise I'm okay knowing that there is help if i need it..This hot weather hasn't been good for any outside activities as the humidity brings every thing to a stand still ..Hopefully the weather will become that one can deal with it..Life still goes on so I make the best of it any way I can...

[Cadee2719]

Jonibee I truly understand what you are going through.  When my husband of 62 years passed away in October everything in my home began to break!  Having focused on him in home hospice care every day for many, many months I guess I did not pay any attention to anything else.  First my washer, then my stove top, dryer, oven, hot water heater, windshield of my car, electric panel (I am not exaggerating!! )  I was at my wits end and feeling hopeless.  Marcy, along with many others on this site walked me through these disasters and I took one step at a time.  I stopped getting so angry and upset and focused on doing what was necessary to resolve the problems.  I have learned a lot during this process and am now quite proud of myself in feeling that I have accomplished something.  I think we are so vulnerable during this time of grief that these things are just the "straw that breaks the camel's back" but we need to pat ourselves on the back realizing that we are doing it and to be proud of our accomplishments.

[mc6844]

I hope you're feeling better Jonibee. Getting through all these things can wear you down. Taking time to build yourself up is a good idea. Take care!

[MarcyW882921]

In the words of Franklin D. Roosevelt, "A smooth sea never made a skilled sailor." You @jonibee encounter the rough seas, recognize them, and find ways to get through them the best way you can. Thinking of you and wishing you calmer waters ahead!

Marcy

[CarolD435501]

I AM STILL IN A FOG.....WRITING IN MY JOURNAL HELPS...AND I hope to be more involved in others Grief & Loss  to help us move forward.....GOD help us all........

[mc6844]

Sounds good Carol. You have a nice day now!

[MarcyW882921]

Hi @CarolD435501 . Embrace the FOG. Your loss is so new that this is a way your body can protect you. Since you mentioned that writing in your journal helps, there is a book Mindfulness & Grief by Heather Stang and you may want to check it out. It is an 8-week program that incorporates mindfulness, meditation, and journal writing. It gave me a focused task to do each day and a sense that I had accomplished something.

Strive to take care of yourself physically, emotionally, and spiritually and know that you are not alone!

[mc6844]

Hi Carol. So nice to hear from you here. Expressing your thoughts and feelings in a journal is an immense help and path to emotional well being. Plus it's your own little place to put your innermost thoughts. And track your progress. Keeping up with things on a daily basis helps to feel grounded in the present day. One foot in front of the other, works. You will feel better soon. Don't forget to eat little meals or snacks throughout the day to keep depression at bay. Thank you for sharing Carol. The people here can help you!