AARP Online Community and Discussion Forums - Re: Help and signs from loved one - Page 2

CarolynS674392 · ‎01-24-2023

I know my husband helps me often from Heaven. I was very dependent on him, but I know he is helping me because I am doing all the things I need to do and handling it all well. My family and friends are in awe of how well I am managing the day to day things you have to do.

As for signs, I was once going to put on a Rod Stewart CD but then remembered it had a scratch on it. My husband was with me when I bought it years ago - my first CD ever. But I realized it was damaged, so I put the radio on and on it was playing a Rod Stewart song. I firmly believe it was a sign.

mc6844 · ‎10-31-2023

Lovely rainbows!

BeatleloverKT · ‎09-08-2023

When we traveled, I always wondered why he

would get gas at only a half a tank. Wednesday

I found out why. A huge car crash in Ky derailed

traffic for nearly two hours. Although I didn’t run

out of gas, I finally figured out why he did that.

So he would never have to worry about it. First

thing I did after we started moving was to get gas.

And I followed his mantra the rest of the way home.

I love that I’m still learning from him even after his

death 💜

MarcyW882921 · ‎10-11-2023

So...The day of my Mom's celebration of life there was a rainbow. It seemed that any significant event that happened relating to my Mom that year was on a day that had a rainbow. I would get this feeling when there was a rain and I would run out and there it would be!

This is the second part of the story. My husband was the only one I could ever remember who told me I was beautiful.

So today was one of my husband's first anniversaries of his passing. On the way back home from my bereavement group meeting that was a bit emotional for me, I stopped at a charity to drop off some donations. As the guy was writing my receipt, he said "I hope you don't mind me being so bold, but you are a beautiful woman." This evening I was returning from my husband's service and it was raining. A beautiful rainbow appeared in the sky and I have not seen one this whole past year that my husband has been gone!

I do believe both of these things were signs from him on a day that he knew would be particularly difficult for me.

SueS788527 · ‎10-11-2023

Marcy, what a wonderful experience. I'm glad that you had so much positive reinforcement. The rainbow is reminding all of us that we are part of a longer natural world that we love and in turn nature loves us, sometimes at specific moments like yours. I am always smiling when I see the Bluebird couple feeding their young on my deck rail or seeing the ground hog lounging around in my backyard. These sightings make you realize that we are part of a greater good. On the compliment, I am thrilled that happened to you. Too often when we are grieving, we show the scars of the caregiver, griever, etc. I know. As I posted a while back, I took a selfie and was surprised how I aged. At first, I was depressed, but then I realized I will smile, be outgoing and not worry about the lines, etc. Also, a long-distance shot helps in my case. All kidding aside, I am sure you are a beautiful woman inside and out. I'm glad someone reminded you of that. Unfortunately, we live in a world of superficial beauty and youth. We just have to be happy with ourselves and try to make the most of each day. My condolences on your first anniversary. I just had my 2-year anniversary. I can say I feel better in the second year. Not sure why, but probably because I have become more self-confident and made a new network of friends. I wish you all the best. You deserve it. Your friend, Sue

BeatleloverKT · ‎08-27-2023

I commented in March about the ladybug signs for

John. Well here I am in Ky and there is a ladybug

on the kitchen wall. He is truly with me in Ky 💜

bk11902161 · ‎09-03-2023

Many years ago my late husband and I were walking on the beach and a woman picked up a penny that was on the sand, as she did so she looked up and said "Thank you Frank" we asked her why she said that. Her reply was every time I pick up a penny I know Frank sent it from Heaven. I recently lost the love of my life, my dear husband and since then I've found a few pennies myself in some unlikely places. As much as I miss him with all my heart I know he's at peace having suffered from cancer for 8 long years. I miss him with every fiber of my being and I'm trying to go on without him. The loss sometimes take my breath away. Thank you for your stories they have helped to read what others have gone and still going through.

mc6844 · ‎11-11-2023

I'm sorry for your loss and missing your husband. The topic of signs from loved ones is heartening. Everyone is someplace. Perhaps closer than we realize. Hope you are ok and doing well. Take care!

mc6844 · ‎09-04-2023

I am truly sorry for your loss BK. The good people on this site can help you. Take care!

MarcyW882921 · ‎09-03-2023

@bk11902161 Your post brought tears to my eyes. I'm so sorry to hear about your husband's suffering and passing. It seems you were meant to be with your husband to share the penny moment because now the pennies you find have a special meaning. Remember your walk on the beach with the love of your life and thank him for sending a sign and watching over you.

BeatleloverKT · ‎09-03-2023

@bk11902161 I am sorry for the loss of your dear husband. My husband died of colon cancer in just ten months. All of it is excruciatingly painful. I do believe in signs from our loved ones and those pennys are definitely from him. As sad as it is, you will, in due time smile every time you pick one up. Thinking of you on this journey no one wants to take. Thanks for sharing 💜🙏

Winter2024 · ‎08-22-2023

One Step At A Time 🤗

MarcyW882921 · ‎08-22-2023

Nicole @Winter2024 , I took a break to go to the Japanese Garden today. I saw more butterflies than I have ever seen when I have visited. To me they are signs of life, growth, spirituality, and being free. They are all things to think about and carry with me on this journey.

Winter2024 · ‎08-13-2023

One Step At A Time 🤗

MarcyW882921 · ‎08-13-2023

Yes I do believe that loved ones send us messages. I have had several of them but for now I will share one of them. I set up a video call with my husband's daughter. After we had spoken for a few minutes, Alexa turned herself on and started playing George Winston selections. George Winston was my husband's go to artist when he wanted to relax or to have a sense of calm during trying times. The music continued to play until a few minutes after the video call ended. At that time, Alexa turned herself off.

Marcy

SueS788527 · ‎06-03-2023

Hi, Carolyn, I wanted to let you know that I too having been having some difficult days now in my second year. There is an image shared in my GriefShare session of a jar with a ball of grief inside. Over time the grief ball is still the same size (contrary to the misconception that grief goes away or diminishes) but the jar expands to a bigger space. The thought is that yes, grief will always be with us, but our environment grows as we continue on our grief journey. I like the word journey since it implies that there is a continuum to another phase or stage of life. We are not stuck in our valley of despair but on a path. What happens on the path varies from individual to individual. I too smell the roses that my husband planted or see the ferns swaying in the breeze. At various times of the year, I see different colored butterflies. Recently I have been seeing white butterflies, which I think is a good omen. All of these sensory images reinforce that my husband of almost 50 years still has presence in my life. Like you and others I am facing a new identity whether I like it or not. I am actually more comfortable with house projects and other tasks. Take it slow and ask for help. I am in a calmer place and now reflect before I dive into new projects, particularly since we all live on a limited budget. Lo and behold, I received some great advice from my HVAC guy the other day, which saved me several thousand dollars. You can do it too. We just have to remember we are not alone. Easier said than done. Have relaxing weekend and try to do something you enjoy. You deserve it. Sue 🦋

BeatleloverKT · ‎03-09-2023

I had forgotten one of John’s signs. We always would see ladybugs but only down the shore. We always associated them with him because he always commented on them. Every now and again,I’ll spot one at home. It always makes me think of him with the fondest of memories 💜

SueS788527 · ‎03-09-2023

Thanks for sharing. That is literally the beauty of this site. I too see other signs as well and am comforted by them. I planted some ferns and Lenten Roses in his memory in an area he had already planted. Now during the season of Lent, all the Lenten Roses are in full bloom as if smiling at me in remembrance of better times. What a wonderful sight. These are the living memories which we enjoy and receive from them. We just have to keep an open heart and mind. It is comforting and reassuring. Sue🍀

BeatleloverKT · ‎03-09-2023

Thank you for sharing your beautiful story. Our loved ones are always with us 💜

SueS788527 · ‎03-09-2023

Hi, Carolyn, I agree with you and the many folks who replied to your message. It is uplifting and beautiful, particularly since this topic has been somewhat taboo in our world today. Ironically some of the nonbelievers become believers once they lose a loved one and receive messages from them. I started to receive them shortly after my husband died. I saw his name on many billboard signs, name of grocery clerks who helped me, etc. I saw butterflies hovering around me in late fall. That was right before the funeral services. These were uplifting moments for me, and I needed them badly. They continue today. You are right about the closeness of our deceased loved ones. They never leave but are part of our continued lives through our memories of many years of companionship and love. I am also finding that I remember my husband's words of wisdom when I venture into the unknown house projects and like someone said find the right tools at the right time. This just goes to show we are not really alone but have to be open to them in spirit. As I read somewhere this grievance journey is a series of blessings and lessons thanks to them. I'm glad you shared your feelings, and, in my case, it brought me some "joy." Thanks, Sue

mc6844 · ‎03-27-2023

Thank you Sue, and all for sharing your signs from loved ones. For me it's finding shiny new quarters. When the grandchildren visited their grandfather would let them have his loose change of quarters and dollar bills he kept in a Maxwell House coffee can. Plus when I write to the grandkids I put a few dollars in their cards. So when I was looking for dollar bills I picked up a storage basket next to my chair. Under the basket were several shiny new quarters. I couldn't believe it. Its true these events are comforting. Knowing our loved ones are nearer than we think. Take care.

CarolynS674392 · ‎03-26-2023

I actually started a conversation with the clerk at the grocery store and she talked to me and said my husband's name just guessing I guess. I was so excited she mentioned Dan without knowing him. I guess an angel told her.

mc6844 · ‎03-27-2023

I believe in the angels, too! Take care.

CarolynS674392 · ‎03-09-2023

Thank you, Sue.

mc6844 · ‎03-04-2023

I believe in signs from loved ones. I joined AARP many years ago. I posted a photo of a pink hibiscus for my avatar. He loved that hibiscus from our little garden. It bloomed in the warm sunny weather. When I returned to AARP for bereavement and grief loss this past week, I saw the hibiscus as my avatar. I took it as a sign of support from him that I am on the right path and trying to get better. Take care.

tyMI95 · ‎02-14-2023

I was never one for believing in signs until recently. My mother passed away on January 20th. The first day the family all came together after traveling to gather at her home, we were outside. My daughter spotted a pink butterfly, which none of us had ever seen. It was more of a blush pink.

My mother absolutely hated pink. However, it's mine and my daughter's favorite color. My mother loved gardening and loved butterflies. Since we have never seen a pink one we did some research on them.

We read an article about the meaning of a pink butterfly. They said it's a way for the recently passed loved one to communicate to others that they are at peace in their afterlife. I truly believe this was my mother letting my daughter and I know she was ok. We were very close to her and I know she was probably worried about us. The butterfly was representing her and pink to direct the message to us.

I would like to say each day is getting easier with her passing, but it would be a lie at this point. I know eventually, I'll be able to get through a day without ugly crying. But I'm not sure if the feeling of emptiness or being incomplete will ever change. It's like someone took the main ingredients out of a pie and all your left with is just a crust with small traces of evidence it was an apple pie.

I guess all you can do is take it one day at a time and hope it gets better.

Thank you for sharing your story. Jen

BeatleloverKT · ‎02-14-2023

Thank you for your poignant post. What a

wonderful sign from your Mother. You will

keep getting those signs, hopefully, and

that is part of what helps us heal and to

go on living. All the best to you 🙏

postman29 · ‎01-24-2023

@CarolynS674392

Thanks for the uplifting post! It's great to read a positive post that gives us all hope. More people need to recognize that sometimes things do happen that we can't explain as just coincidence.