👍 Encouragement!!!

[SpringIsHereVA]

Stop by when you can to encourage others or ask for some.

WE all have days/nights when we need this!!!

Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗  (Grief Forum)

[DianeB887812]

Nicole,

I have been dealing with toxic family all my life. It’s why I have an aversion to conflict. But it has made me strong in other ways. I will get through this challenge. Stephen is by my side. And now I have an understanding shoulder to help me weather this , my dear Nicole. 

As to the fur baby , it could be a cat. We will see. 

[SpringIsHereVA]

Dear Jonibee, losing your husband after being his caregiver has been a challenge for you dear friend. My thoughts are with you for your upcoming surgery in September.

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

@jonibee 

[mc6844]

I agree , Jonibee.  I remember your posts. You've worked your way through a lot. I hope things continue to be well with you. 

[SpringIsHereVA]

[1] Dear Diane, one area that really upsets me are how our vets are treated and their family. I had one here, John who died in the VA Hospital last year. He went in and never returned home after falling. I miss my friend. YOU FIGHT to get those medical bills paid. Your husband served his country while he was alive!!!

[2] Dear Cadee, my sweet and inspiring friend. Here you are grieving the loss of your husband, brother and son and the medical system has the nerve to add more unnecessary stress to your life. YOU FIGHT to get what you need to function. Growing old is no fun when you are in pain all the time.

[3] Dear Marcy, gosh girl - those migraines need to pack up and leave. I am hoping you have been able to get some relief. Your husband and your guardian angel are reminding you to hang in there. Yes, those signs you posted about. He is not here in the physical sense but he will always be inside of you until you see him again.

Luv you ALL,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

@DianeB887812 @Cadee2719 @MarcyW882921 @jonibee  

[MarcyW882921]

Thank you Nicole @SpringIsHereVA . Yes, the migraines do need to pack up and go away. I have appointments with the acupuncturist and neurologist in the next few weeks as part of my headache self-care. I continue to see angel signs in repeating numbers and my husband appeared in a dream last night. His birthday is coming up on Saturday and he is with me.

Marcy

[DianeB887812]

I need to set the record straight. The VA has paid Every bill. It was wonderful that we could use hospitals and doctors close to home for 90% of his care. Working to get Those bills paid is more of an annoyance as the providers each have to be trained on how to work with the VA to get paid. It’s not like the regular insurance companies and it confuses them. But I repeat the VA has covered everything Stephen ever needed from day one. They are a God Sent Blessing. It’s just been a little hard on me mentally as I’m not as sharp as I need to be to keep all of it straight but it is getting close to done. I just do not want to criticize the VA. They are doing their part wonderfully. 

[SpringIsHereVA]

Ms. Idaho aka Cadee @Cadee2719  🤗🤗🤗

Dear Sweet, Strong and Luvable Friend, I know right now it seems like all h.ll has broken loose.

Yes, you FINALLY get all set up [well, kind of] in IDAHO and your body is TESTING you right now.

Here are my 2 cents  🙄  on all this:

[1] This too shall pass as long as you NEVER give up. Remember the AWFUL life you finally left behind in CALIFORNIA!!! You stuck to your goal and NEVER gave up.  💃💃💃

[2] Talk to folks you have met to see IF there are any MEDICARE ADVOCATES near you. Sorry it is SO COMPLICATED changing states with MEDICARE.  😤😤😤

I am DREADING my return to FLORIDA FROM VIRGINIA.  😭😭😭

Luv you, PROUD OF YOU my friend,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[Cadee2719]

  Thank You Nicole   I am so confused as to why simply finding doctors is so complicated and is taking so long.  Is there a shortage of doctors in America?  I find that most family practice is run by an RN, ACRNP ?, MSN, Physician Assistant or Nurse Practitioner.  Believe it or not one clinic said the only person they had available to see patients was a young lady currently in college taking classes to become a nurse!!!!!  Is this what "Healthcare" in America has become?  This certainly is an issue AARP should delve into.  I will remain diligent and continue to jump through the "hoops" required to simply get an appointment to see a doctor.  I agree with you, I am fortunate to be here; a beautiful place, friendly, kind people and most importantly:  safe.   

[SpringIsHereVA]

Thank you SO MUCH for asking MC @mc6844 !!!

It is 8pm for me and SO GLAD this holiday will soon be OVER.  💃💃💃

Luv you VERY MUCH,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

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[*** MC @mc6844 wrote:

Thank you Nicole. How are you doing? ***]

[mc6844]

I agree Nicole. The holidays aren't easy. Too many memories. Now so much has changed. Right now I'm thinking a holiday from grieving could be a good idea.

[mc6844]

Thank you Nicole. How are you doing?

[SpringIsHereVA]

@WebWiseWoman , thank you for info.

@Therapist4u , your humor is ALWAYS welcome here.

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[Therapist4u]

Nicole

 Thanks 😊

[WebWiseWoman]

Hi, Nicole! Another great post!

Just a note, we (my adult daughters and I) volunteer at Veterans' Cemeteries, which involves zero stress; just helping maintain (e.g., polishing markers, picking up debris), serving as host, guide, information provider, or just placing American flags for commemorative holidays (Memorial Day, D-Day, Veterans' Day...). Strictly on an as available basis, so no set schedule unless one would prefer that.

From the National Park Service site:

"The VA manages 128 National Cemeteries in 39 States and in Puerto Rico. Volunteers are needed here to help maintain the cemeteries and the 2.9 million gravesites. For information on volunteering at National Cemeteries, visit the National Cemetery Administration's Volunteer website or contact a National Cemetery near you."

If there is one near you, this might be an option.

hth

denese

[SpringIsHereVA]

‌Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass. It is about learning to dance in the rain.

Nicole  ‌🤗‌‌🤗‌‌🤗‌

[mc6844]

Memorial Day to me is sad in itself. So many losses for many people and families. Since my recent loss almost a year and a half ago now, I'm thinking today much of those months have passed in a blur. Some things I've done well with, other things not. At my age I know so many widows with worries. And people going through transitions. Nothing stays the same for long now. A friend told me she keeps a journal. I guess I look on the grief forum as my journal. And grateful for this place and people here. It is helpful to read through the posts on those tough days. And leave the grief and sadness, until it pops up again. I believe there's also delayed grief. When our lives were very busy and we didn't have time to go through the process. These days I'm tired of feeling like a piece of Swiss cheese!  Lol

[SpringIsHereVA]

.

[mc6844]

Thank you for posting your gifs Nicole! They are all so cute and cheering. For those of us no longer up to caring for pets and miss them. I try to drop in at the forum and offer encouragement when I can. I appreciate all the help and support. I keep going at a daily pace. Glad I got some household stuff done before these hot days. It's mostly me and my rechargable fan lol. I'm grateful I can do what I can. At 74 got to be extra careful. Had two recent falls. Both times I was upset about things. Good news is that I could get up lol. 74 is no spring chicken. Detaching from certain things is paramount these days. But that's the way it goes. We get old and have to adjust.

I'm sorry for everyone's losses and struggles on the forum. It's a good place to stop in and give and seek support. A focused forum on loss and grief. I've found our loved ones are nearer than we think. It takes time from the initial stages of grief to realize these things. So like Nicole's gif says Don't Give Up! 

[SpringIsHereVA]

Yes MC @mc6844 , those falls as we AGE are not something we want and GLAD you are okay. Gosh, IF I fell - no one here in Virginia would CARE or even look out IF I called an ambulance. Scary!!! So I TRY to keep things tidy so as NOT to trip. Had a few close calls = moved stuff out of the way. I also NOW use a flashlight for those nights I get up to find the light switch. Never failed, I would "trip" on something in the dark.  😱😱😱

SO GOOD HEARING FROM YOU = made my day VERY SPECIAL!!!  💃💃💃

Luv you VERY MUCH,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

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[*** MC @mc6844 wrote:

Thank you for posting your gifs Nicole! They are all so cute and cheering. For those of us no longer up to caring for pets and miss them. I try to drop in at the forum and offer encouragement when I can. I appreciate all the help and support. I keep going at a daily pace. Glad I got some household stuff done before these hot days. It's mostly me and my rechargable fan lol. I'm grateful I can do what I can. At 74 got to be extra careful. Had two recent falls. Both times I was upset about things. Good news is that I could get up lol. 74 is no spring chicken. Detaching from certain things is paramount these days. But that's the way it goes. We get old and have to adjust.

I'm sorry for everyone's losses and struggles on the forum. It's a good place to stop in and give and seek support. A focused forum on loss and grief. I've found our loved ones are nearer than we think. It takes time from the initial stages of grief to realize these things. So like Nicole's gif says Don't Give Up! ***]

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[mc6844]

Thank you Nicole. I got a watch that makes calls. Alert services are pricey. Getting a nightlight is on my list. We don't think we need these things, until we do. Thanks for the reminder! 

[SpringIsHereVA]

You are welcome MC @mc6844 . Nightlights keep me awake. Lol, already NOT sleeping. Yes, having a way to call is a great idea. Thanks for that reminder. Hmmm, so you have to make sure you are wearing your watch at all times (except in shower). Use to wear one years ago. Now hate them and rings. But now that you mention it - I NEED one.

Luv you,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

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[*** @mc6844 wrote:

Thank you Nicole. I got a watch that makes calls. Alert services are pricey. Getting a nightlight is on my list. We don't think we need these things, until we do. Thanks for the reminder! ***]

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[mc6844]

Watch update: sold out! Before I could get one. So no more contraptions. I will trust my Guardian Angel to deliver a message if needed.

[mc6844]

Your phone should have Google Assist or something similar. You can keep phone on bath vanity while taking shower. If you need help you call into Google Assist and ask it to call your contact. You don't have to pick up the phone. No initial or monthly fee. 

[Therapist4u]

If I fell......

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vq78BDwCujs&t=50s

[mc6844]

Lol.  You have such a sense of humor!

[Therapist4u]

Hi MC @mc6844 Thanks so much for the compliment! It made my day to know someone cares about what I try to do...send some positivity.... & a little jollity (a real word!) wherever I can...LOL!

I also try to lessen & lighten the impacts of this crazy world....but...when there are serious subjects, then I’m also serious, whether in my life or with others.

Humor can be therapeutic, but not everyone gets it, or wants it, & that is fine! Humor doesn’t always work...ask any standup comedian who just delivered a punch line...only to hear the proverbial ‘crickets’....the dreaded sounds of silence!! LOL!

Anyway, please try to continue to strengthen & heal...& take care! ~Allen

[mc6844]

Thank you Allen, and for your humor. 

[Therapist4u]

Thank you again MC @mc6844

As always, ...Stay safe....&...Take care!

~Allen

[SpringIsHereVA]

Angel @coolslick , I AM SO GLAD you have a Social Worker and looking into some addtional help!!!  💃💃💃

Luv you VERY MUCH,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

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[*** ANGEL @coolslick wrote:

🤗You're not kidding it's like talking to your twin...God bless..I feel like sisters..Got it about the pen pal thing , there is no movement on it..having been on a pen pal site before , I was talking to a woman who I thought was a man..nice conversations..never out of line but a scammer all the same...Oh Lord! I don't need drama kings and queens...no one has contacted me and I am just fine with it being you and I..I am exactly the same..I had 3 daughters...lost my middle one 27 years ago at 21..so I have 2 daughters I talk to and would like to not bring my grief to them..they hurt too..I have wonderful conversations with everyone in Walmart. And Now thank God I have you...I am looking into a grief group that has 2 meetings a week, I talked to the Social worker this morning for about an hour...she said I have what's called Stacked Grief..Oh Boy!! do I get that "Old Lady Nap" and love every minute of it...will catch up tomorrow...enjoy the rest of your day...✌️xo  ***]

[coolslick]

Thank you..I am in a very bad frame of mind right now..I need to eat , I am a diabetic , and go out..and I cannot pull myself together...I saw something that went into my heart concerning my ex husband and children's father whom I loved and he loved me back for 55 years..we lost a daugher and the day he passed I lost my last part of her...everytime I see something that reminds me of our 4 year dating years it tears my heart to pieces...it's been almost a year and I cannot get through it...I did remarry but we never lost contact...after my second husband [assed 13 years ago , we rebuilt our relationship, friendship, never moved back in together but the bond and closeness was there...I took care of him the best he would allow me at the end of his life...he was a very I'll Nam vet...