🕯 A Place To Be With OTHERS Who Are Grieving! WE support each other.

[Anonymous]

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***A place to share and support***

Grief & Loss Team 🤎🤗

📸clipart attached📸

[ec73392645]

So sorry for your loss.  I lost my life partner of 21 years 8/27 so I needed help reached out and I joined GriefShare.  If you go to their website griefshare.org and type in your zip code a list of groups will appear that are near where you live.  So far I have found it quite helpful and I also go for one on one counseling with a certified counselor.

Don't be afraid to reach out.  There is a great deal of support out there.  You just have to search for it.  Best of luck!

Estelle Coffino

[mc6844]

So very sorry for the loss of your dear life partner. And glad you stopped by to share your grief. Little by little, a new dawn arises. Take care!

[agoyer]

@tttttt I'm so very sorry for your loss. It's a shock to the system and the sadness and grief ca be overwhelming. You've come to the right place! Lots of good suggestions are coming your way. I might just add:

• You might check GriefShare - they have a listing of support groups. 
• You can contact a local hospice organization - they often have grief support groups that are open to anyone (not just people who have used their hospice services), and/or they may have a list of local support groups they can give you. 

My heart goes out to you. I know you feel alone; there are lots of people here to support you. And I encourage you to reach out to friends and family and ask for their help. They can help get you out of the house now and then, gradually help you re-engage in activities and life. 

Also, always remember you can call the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline (they help people in any kind of a crisis - not just suicide) any time 24/7 - just call 988. You can also chat or text with their well-trained crisis counselors - check their website to do that. 

Take care,

Amy Goyer, AARP Family & Caregiving Expert

Author, Juggling Life, Work and Caregiving

[MarcyW882921]

Oh my @tttttt ! I am so sorry to hear about your husband Ron. What you are feeling is so frightening! I'm so glad you stopped by to post and the people who post in this forum will do our best to try and support you however we can.

I don't know where you are or what kind of group you are interested in joining. I understand that hospice groups offer bereavement groups, although mine never contacted me to offer the service. I was put on a wait list from Jewish Family Services (and their groups are for all people regardless of religious or non-religious background) and they did call me when there was an opening. Community churches also offer groups or individual meetings with clergy.

My heart goes out to you!

Marcy

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

1 comment (Tuesday 10/24/23)

Lol, Marcy @MarcyW882921 🤣😂

GOOD to hear from you! 💃💃💃

Luv You,

Nicole 🤗

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✏@MarcyW882921 wrote:

Yes Nicole @SpringIsHereSoHappy, I did this in the last couple of weeks. Fortunately it was with a pair of jeans and I had a long shirt so I don't think anyone noticed but me!  LOL

Marcy✏

[MarcyW882921]

Nicole @SpringIsHereSoHappy,

Hoping things have calmed down for you and you got your WalMart fix.🙂

Marcy

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

1 comment (Tuesday 10/24/23)

Hey MC @mc6844 , can you tell us about your picture? 🤔

Thanks,

Nicole 🤗

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✏@mc6844 wrote:

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📸  MC Attached A Picture  📸

[mc6844]

Yes. My new ceramic pup! I had fun fooling those who thought it was a real puppy! Lol  

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

2 comments (Monday 10/23/23)

⚠️QUESTION OF THE DAY/NIGHT!

Did you do something (or plan to) that brought you peace TODAY/TONIGHT? 🤔

ME:  I changed Pillowcases TODAY and BEFORE putting on CLEAN one - I SPRAYED Cinnamon on pillow.

These are PRICEY and come in DIFFERENT scents including Pumpkin. 🙃

But I DESERVE them = RELAXES me after a Day From H.ll like TODAY! 😎

[mc6844]

Sorry about your day Nicole. Hope today is easier!

[ec73392645]

Funny I also changed pillow cases today and sprayed lavender

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

👣  1 Step At A Time!

[mc6844]

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

2 comments (Monday 10/23/23)

It was NOT "funny" THIS MORNING - but now it is/lol 🤣😂

Here I am in the Waiting Room at my Eye Doctor THIS MORNING for my 8:30am appointment AFTER "running" late. 🙄

I am looking out the WINDOW and notice something WHITE on my blouse in my reflection.

Oh YES, a tag! I had put on my blouse on WRONG SIDE. 😱

Ran to their Restroom to flip it over.

Can you imagine I would have been the TALK OF THE OFFICE today once I left....

Yikes, NO sleep last night = glad I made it to them and back home WITHOUT running anyone over.

Anyone ever done this? 🤔

[MarcyW882921]

Yes Nicole @SpringIsHereSoHappy, I did this in the last couple of weeks. Fortunately it was with a pair of jeans and I had a long shirt so I don't think anyone noticed but me!  LOL

Marcy

[mc6844]

Lol Yes with cardigans many times. 

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

2 comments (Tuesday 10/24/23)

▶️*** Dear Erica @EricaS968839 , I just ADDED the LINK to the CAREGIVERS FORUM below if you want to stop by. Sorry, forgot to ADD yesterday ***◀️

(Monday 10/23/23)

Dear Erica, I AM SO SORRY for your loss!!! 😭

I luv your idea of doing Halloween since your Mom enjoyed it. 👍

Gosh, dealing with your Dad's Dementia - you may find some support in the AARP Caregiver's Forum.  The LINK to that FORUM is below!

https://community.aarp.org/t5/Caregiving/bd-p/bf41

*** Sandy @sandy  , Jane @JaneCares   , Amy @agoyer   - any suggestions?  🤔 ***

Sandy is an AARP Employee.

Jane and Amy are BOTH AARP Experts.

I am SO GLAD you stopped by my friend.

Luv you,

Nicole 🤗

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✏@EricaS968839 wrote:

Thank you. My mom passed away almost a year ago. 10/31/22 was when she passed, unexpectedly. It's been a very tough year. My dad is in the final stages of Dementia. He is in assisted living, amd has 24/7 hospice care. I have alot of support, but as the anniversary of my mom's passing approaches, my grief is getting worse. I'm trying to plan ahead for the day, which, is also Halloween. My mom loved Halloween, so, my thought was to try to put together candy for the kiddos. She also loved children. Any ideas for getting through that day would be greatly appreciated. ✏ 

[agoyer]

@SpringIsHereSoHappy  @EricaS968839  Your situation sounds so familiar to me! My Mom died suddenly on Oct.11 in 2014. Dad had Alzheimer's, although he was not in late stages he was more in mid stage. It was so hard to head into the holidays that year. My parents also loved Halloween - they used to dress up to meet the trick-or-treaters. When I was caregiving for them I would dress up too and we would sit outside and greet all the kiddos. So fun! I was heartsick that first Halloween. I did what you are doing - honored Mom by dressing up, sitting outside with Daddy and greeting the trick or treaters. Doing it in honor of her really made it easier for me, even though of course I had moments of great sadness. Every year I do that now. Next was Thanksgiving, then Christmas - it was a hard year and the following year too. Another thing I've found on these hard Anniversaries of Loss is that making a new memory on that day is helpful to me. On the one year anniversary after Mom died, my boyfriend and I took a little trip to see Fall leaves. A distraction and a new memory. 

Anything you can do to honor your mother's memory is helpful! Cook her favorite food, watch her favorite movie (and maybe she is watching along with you in spirit). Physical activity can be helpful too. And it's ok to cry and be quiet that day too. 

You've gotten through the "year of firsts" so that's something to feel good about - you did it. So so so hard. ❤️ Take good care of yourself. 

Take care,

Amy Goyer, AARP Family & Caregiving Expert

Author, Juggling Life, Work and Caregiving

[EricaS968839]

Thank-you Nicole!! Your response and support is so kind. Luv to you as well!! 🙂

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

1 comment (Monday 10/23/23)

Thanks for asking MC @mc6844 💙💙💙

Small Cataracts in BOTH eyes.

Luv you,

Nicole 🤗

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✏@mc6844 wrote:

Hope it was good Nicole. I know its not easy getting to these appointments.✏

[mc6844]

It's good they're small at least

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

(2 comments) Monday 10/23/23

👓👀  See you later! Got a 8:30am EST Yearly Eye Exam TODAY.

Hate them, but know I NEED them! 👍

Luv,

Nicole 🤗

[Cadee2719]

Just returned from my eye exam.  (I think I am going to rent a room in the medical building with all the appointments I have had this month!!!).  Have to have surgery on my other eye for cataract/glaucoma surgery.  They will have to put stents in this eye as they did in my other eye.  I told them I will have to wait until 2024 as I am in the process of seeing the Rheumotologist soon and have to resolve that issue.  Nicole I AM FALLING APART.  😫   I am greatful that I have taken the time to finally go to the doctors and am working on taking care of my health.  This is a new concept for a caregiver, but one that is necessary.

[mc6844]

Hope it was good Nicole. I know its not easy getting to these appointments.

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

2 comments (Monday 10/23/23)

You are welcome dear Erica and thank you!!! 💙💙💙

Nicole 🤗

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✏ Erica wrote:

Thank-you Nicole!! Your response and support is so kind. Luv to you as well!! 🙂 ✏

[EricaS968839]

Thank you. My mom passed away almost a year ago. 10/31/22 was when she passed, unexpectedly. It's been a very tough year. My dad is in the final stages of Dementia. He is in assisted living, amd has 24/7 hospice care. I have alot of support, but as the anniversary of my mom's passing approaches, my grief is getting worse. I'm trying to plan ahead for the day, which, is also Halloween. My mom loved Halloween, so, my thought was to try to put together candy for the kiddos. She also loved children. Any ideas for getting through that day would be greatly appreciated. 

[mc6844]

Erica, I'm so sorry for the loss of your Mom. And it's so nice you are there for your Dad. I know these times are very painful. There are good people on this site who can help you get through this. 

Halloween can be a way to detach and help your Mom celebrate her favorite time in spirit. I know someone who has an angel 😇 ghost floating in front of his house!  

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

1 comment (SUNDAY - October 22, 2023)

TODAY IS OUR DEAR MARCY'S ANNIVERSARY DAY! 😥

Marcy @MarcyW882921 , you are in my thoughts and prayers ALL THE TIME but especially TODAY dear friend. 💙🙏

I know you have things planned including dinner with a friend.

Hats off to you girl - you inspire me to do the same INSTEAD of my USUAL stay in my bed and CRY. 👍

*** The luv of your life (hubbie) is seeing all this and has a SMILE on his face as he sees YOUR efforts. As usual, HE will be WITH you today/tonight ***

Luv you,

Nicole 🤗

[MarcyW882921]

Thank you so much Nicole @SpringIsHereSoHappy. I have had memories of this horrible day a year ago off and on during the day. On the other hand, I feel fulfilled that I was able to make a difference in some people's lives today. I spoke to strangers, let people go in front of me, served food to people who are less fortunate, and participated in a walk against hate. In addition, I have been blessed with friends who treated me to dinner, sent gifts, and sent text messages. I have many things to be grateful for and I feel that my husband's legacy lives on through all of our acts of kindness.

Marcy

[SpringIsHereSoHappy]

👣  1 Step At A Time!