🕯 A Place To Be With OTHERS Who Are Grieving! WE support each other.

[Winter2024]

THIS GROUP IS OPEN TO ALL GRIEVERS NO MATTER HOW LONG IT HAS BEEN [years,days].

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Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗  (Grief Forum)

[jonibee]

Doing daily things such as getting up , fixing yourself breakfast and getting ready for the day helps. Doing daily chores such as bed making, general pickup and listening to the news to keep abreast of what is happening around you keeps you in the present. Also learning something new or keeping up with family or acquaintances is good for the mind and body..Having a hobby be it stamp collecting, puzzles, word search or playing on line games keeps the brain going..Get out for some fresh air if only to walk around the yard be in tune with Nature and the changing seasons..

[Winter2024]

I know for a fact with me "inheriting" Mr.  🐈,  in between the "stress" of ADDED responsibility and expense - I do have to get up to feed him BREAKFAST. Before, I spent WAY TOO MUCH time in bed feeling sorry for myself.

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[Winter2024]

[9/22/24] Julie @JulieT507376 , do you and Sadie  🐕  go for WALKS?

I miss Jeremiah  🐕,  we would be out walking EVERY morning and evening. He was a TINY "mixed" breed. MISS him after years, but like with losing "humans" - I DO NOT well with losing "furbabies"...

Lol, people do WALK their cats. Hmmm, maybe I need to train Mr.  🐈. Nope, Mr. Rebel ain't buying that.  🤣😂

Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[JulieT507376]

I live on an acreage where Sadie runs free and hunts for whatever she decides to pounce on!  I think she had a gopher treat in that picture 😬 We walk to the mailbox together and play fetch and frisbee.  Her true love is herding cattle.  That was her job duty for her daddy.  Me…just a lot of cute tricks and cuddles in bed.  Her life has truly changed after her daddy passed away.  Many people assumed I would sale this big place and all the land.  No way!  Sadie needs this place!  As long as I have her I’m staying!

[Winter2024]

Lol, I don't know whose MOOD SWINGS are worst - the cat, my daughter or me. Could NOT get any ALONE time ALL OF LAST WEEK. Even could NOT get my DAILY OLD LADY NAP. So TODAY, his a.ss is "outside" napping/grooming and TOTALLY IGNORING me!!!/lol  🤣😂

[Cadee2719]

  Is this a picture of you or your daughter?  BEAUTIFUL

[Winter2024]

🗣  Group Discussion: Have you RELOCATED or "thinking" about it? Or STAYING WHERE YOU ARE. Or STAYING in the SAME city, but selling/moving in with family/downsize? Any TIPS to share? Pros & Cons of YOUR MOVE? They say NOT to make any MAJOR decisions immediately.

[Winter2024]

At the moment we have Marcy @MarcyW882921 who stayed and renovated. Cadee @Cadee2719 who relocated to be nearer to family. Jonibee @jonibee who I "think" stayed (correct me IF needed Jonibee). Julie @JulieT507376 is NEW to our group and at the moment is staying. But I do worry about her being "way out" during the ice and snow she mentioned. Lol, then me - TRYING to "wait" it out where I am until my "only" child figures out her life after being laid of ff. Anyway, I would luv to hear from OUR GROUP and OTHER GRIEVERS. Why are you staying or moving? Thanks, Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[Cadee2719]

Relocating is a BIG DECISION.  People need to do what is comfortable and possible for them.  I understand staying if surrounded by family and feeling safe and content in your surroundings.  I also understand that financially it is extremely expensive to re-locate.  It is also frightening to relocate to a new environment, hoping that you made the right decision.  Nicole, I think you are making the right decision in waiting to see what your daughter is planning to do.  I also think you should spend this time doing your research into the possibilities of relocating.  The priorities are:  Financial, Medical facilities, Safety, Convenience, Wants & Needs.  I truly hope that you find a place that makes you happy and content.  I find that my move was a "MIRACLE" as it has given me all of the benefits that I only dreamed of.  Each person is different and must do what works for them and only they know what criteria that is.  You are still young and have the time to do this IF this is what you want to do.  I am here for you.  ❤️

[JulieT507376]

I have lost love ones recently and my husband just left me alone to handle everything.  My oldest son,  grandfather of the baby that just passed away is talking about divorcing my daughter in law.  There is so much more drama in my life I can’t trouble you with.  Mark would help me through all of this one step at a time.  Now I’m alone.  I visit with a counselor and I have friends but it’s not the same.  We were partners not just support.  I no longer have a partner.  I find myself wanting so badly to be with him.  I know you all understand what I’m feeling.  I’m dead inside without Mark.  I think Sadie knows my sadness.  I wish I could be happier for her.  Fall is coming.  It’s cooling off.  I’m going to be alone on these cold nights.  Where I live there is lots of snow and ice.  I will be shut in.  Mark would be the brave driver! 

[Cadee2719]

  Julie, I truly understand.  My husband and I would have been married 63 years this November. We were partners in life and now I am alone.  I am learning about who I am as a person.  It is overwhelming to be responsible for all the decisions in life, praying that I am making the right ones.  Most important is for you to TAKE CARE OF YOU.  Eliminate negative people in your life and realize that "you" cannot be their sounding board or resolve their problems.  I cannot tell you what a load has been lifted off my shoulders by doing this.  Perhaps to some this may sound cruel and self absorbed BUT it is time that we take care of ourselves.  (A new concept for me)  I will be honest with you and admit I don't know if and when this sadness will go away but I work hard at finding a little happiness each day.  I will be experiencing my first winter with snow being alone in my home and I will admit that I am lost as to what I will do to occupy my time and mind. I know for fact that I will be ordering groceries to be delivered because there is NO WAY I am driving in the snow!   It will be two years this October that I lost my husband and it feels like it was yesterday.  I pray that each day I will become stronger.  I, too journal, and agree with Marcy that this helps me process my feelings.  My friends here taught me ONE DAY AT A TIME and to be kind to ourselves.  In a way we are lucky; we had a love that will never be forgotten and those memories,  are what will get us through each day.  ❤️

[MarcyW882921]

My heart goes out to you Julie @JulieT507376 . It is likely too overwhelming to think about all of the things going on around you. Focus on yourself and prioritize things that need to be done for you. Talking with your counselor and friends definitely is not the same as talking with your spouse, but their support is still an important part of your life. Some people find that continuing to talk with their loved one is beneficial and it doesn't cost anything to try. Although I am not a writer, I did find writing my thoughts in a journal was helpful. You are a different person now than you were when Mark was with you and it will take time to find out who you are now.

Marcy

[jonibee]

I have finally returned to knitting after a time away  because of carpal tunnel . This was before the leg problems...My last visit with vascular she said I would feel a lot of difference after a month so far this leg is doing okay but I have another issue called Bakers Ciyst on both legs which is where the leg bends behind the knee..It's a sac that fills up with fluid and hurts when the leg is prone position so propping it up takes the pressure off..A diet that is low in salt and foods that have salt in them has to be abstained as this makes matters worse..If it doesn't improve than an Orthopedic doctor would have to be seen possibly to drain that area..Hopefully it won't come to this...I have my days that I still mourn the loss of hubby but feel that he is with me spirit wise...I keep busy on the days that I feel up to it..Knitting is very relaxing providing that you don't do intricate patterns where mistakes can be made very easily..Have a nice weekend to All...

[MarcyW882921]

Joni @jonibee ,

It is comforting to feel your husband's spirit and great to have an activity that provides relaxation. I'm glad you have both and hope that along with following your doctor's orders will get you through your current physical challenges.

Marcy

[jonibee]

dish cloth knittedtri-colored scarf knittedknitted fingerless opera style glovesboys knitted cardiganwall hanging knitted flower basketknitted 4 seasons wreathswork in progress color block throw knittedAsst. things knittedFall knitted slipper sox

[JulieT507376]

jonibee, beautiful projects!  I wish I knew how to do that!  Busy hands are happy hands🥰😊

[Winter2024]

SO GOOD to hear from YOU Jonibee @jonibee !!! Happy Dance Time.  💃💃💃

Wow and wow - you are indeed TALENTED!!!  👍👍👍

Lol, I need to order some Winter Stuff from you.

On the serious, thank you SO MUCH for sharing = made my DAY EXTRA SPECIAL my friend.

Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

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[*** JONIBEE wrote: 📸  Several Pictures  📸

dish cloth knittedtri-colored scarf knittedknitted fingerless opera style glovesboys knitted cardiganwall hanging knitted flower basketknitted 4 seasons wreathswork in progress color block throw knittedAsst. things knittedFall knitted slipper sox

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***]

[jonibee]

Right now I'm a bit "rusty" and I'm making a knitted ribbed hat in black with a combo use of odds n ends of yarn in the border red/olive/ rust  which adds interest as black sometimes needs a color to liven things up and it's hard on the eyes especially when doing a pattern (can't detect the stitches)...I like making decorations to hang to display...

[jonibee]

These are items that I have knitted in the past. I had to take a break from knitting for over a year due to carpal tunnel in both hands. Recently I have returned to knitting but only for short periods of time so no to stress the hand and fingers..I was asked to show some of my knitting projects these are a small sampling...

[Winter2024]

🙏  Cadee @Cadee2719 , your brother is in my thoughts today my friend.

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[Cadee2719]

  Thank You Nicole.  My brother has macular degeneration in both eyes and was receiving shots in them to try to retain some sight.  The fall caused such damage in his "good" eye meaning the one that he was able to see a little more out of and he will now lose that eye.  😪  They are delaying the surgery while dealing with his heart.  He also broke his nose in the fall.  I am going there to help take care of him and to help my sister-in-law.  She is so fragile and this has really taken a toll on her.  Please keep him in your prayers.  

[jonibee]

Hoping all goes well for your brother and sister-inlaw and take care of you too..

[Cadee2719]

  Thank You   I am doing as you suggested.  Heat/Ice, elevate my legs and yesterday I put on compression socks which seemed to help.  I have also begun my search for a vascular doctor.  Thank You for all your suggestions.  My son is taking me down to my brother's home (2 hours away).  I will stay there and help them and once the surgery on his eye is scheduled, they will come to my home and I will care for him here.

[MarcyW882921]

Cadee @Cadee2719 ,

Another challenge for you dear Cadee. I'm sorry to hear about your brother's fall. I will keep him (and your sister-in-law) in my prayers and hope that they will address all of your brother's issues. Together you are stronger so stick together and support one another.

Marcy

[Cadee2719]

 We lost our parents when we were quite young, Dad 2 and Mom 14 so I have become the "parent" even though he is two years younger than me.  When we are together, I can make him laugh and LISTEN to me. 😋  I know he is frightened and I know it is important that I be there.

[Winter2024]

😴  Wishing everyone "rest & sweet dreams" TONIGHT!!!

Anyone NEED "rain" = I will be happy to SHARE./lol  🤣😂

Hope YOUR day was PEACEFUL.

Luv you,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[MarcyW882921]

Wow Nicole...we had some big rain storms here this afternoon too! I'm glad it was nice this morning for my tennis game and I'm grateful when the rain is on the outside and not on the inside.

Marcy

[Winter2024]

So Marcy @MarcyW882921 , guess WHICH DAYS there is NO rain. As you guys know I STAY IN Friday, Saturday & Sunday. Yes, those 3 days. Then guess what is SUPPOSE to happen on my 4 days of errands and so on. YES, MORE RAIN./lol  🤣😂  Maybe Mother Nature does NOT want me to finish waxing my car BEFORE it gets cold.  🙄🙄🙄  Hmmm, wonder if she takes "bribes"... Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

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[*** MARCY wrote: Wow Nicole...we had some big rain storms here this afternoon too! I'm glad it was nice this morning for my tennis game and I'm grateful when the rain is on the outside and not on the inside.

Marcy ***]

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[MarcyW882921]

Nicole @Winter2024 , if it's like it is here, the weather forecast changes by the hour. Don't give up hope for some good errand running weather.

Marcy

[Winter2024]

🤔  Any CHORUS NEWS Marcy @MarcyW882921 ?

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗