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Honored Social Butterfly

πŸ•― A Place To Be With OTHERS Who Are Grieving! WE support each other.

πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—  THIS GROUP IS OPEN TO ALL GRIEVERS NO MATTER HOW LONG IT HAS BEEN [years,days]. To participate, click on reply button at bottom of this post. Enter your comment. Click on reply again. Any questions, you can PM [AARP Private Message] me.

 

▢️*** Cadee said this BELOW. ***πŸ”½

 

SHARING thoughts on caring for oneself, making doctor appointments (and the difficulty in doing so), discussing relocating, dealing with finances and life's decisions are all important issues to discuss. These are all a part of being alone and having to make big decisions for ourselves (perhaps for the very first time). Once one "accepts" the reality of being alone, it is difficult to have to make these decisions for ourselves ALONE. Hearing how others do it and have done it has been extremely helpful to me. Accepting the loss is NOT the end of this journey. Listening to tapes and reading books does not always offer the personal touch needed at times. Having someone make us smile and knowing there are people out there that truly do care about you is a gift. THIS GROUP IS DEDICATED TO CADEE @Cadee2719  πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—

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Honored Social Butterfly

MY RESPONSE: I will start this discussion with my DAILY reminder and HOPE others will also SHARE. Hey, your story may ENCOURAGE someone TODAY/TONIGHT!!!  πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—

 

As a child I dealt with an alcoholic father who beat my mother daily. Climbing up in a HUGE tree to escape, read and nap was my ESCAPE. And add that "gentle" breeze that ALWAYS stopped by to "rock" me to sleep. My Maternal grandparents made my parents drop me off EVERY summer when school was closed. Months of being LUVED and company for them. THEY are gone, but REMIND me they will ALWAYS luv me with a "gentle" wind in some tree I happen to be by. Tears are in my eyes as I write this. Luv you Grandpops & Mamamae.

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Silver Conversationalist

I can relate to your story Nicole @iLuvNature . My family situation growing up could be somewhat volatile. Fortunately my paternal grandparents lived on our ground floor and definitely provided love, stability, and security. At times, I too sought refuge in a tree, in the woods, and behind a sectional couch. They were safe places for me to escape and find peace. It's not a bad thing even as an adult to have places to go where you can decompress, relax, and be at peace.

 

Marcy

Honored Social Butterfly

πŸ“ΈAttachmentπŸ“Έ  [9/7/24] Dear Jonibee @jonibee , I HOPE your surgery went well YESTERDAY dear friend. Luv you, Nicole  πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—

 

cat-kitty.gif

 

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Esteemed Social Butterfly

My surgery did go well and I'm on the road to recovery ...It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be...Great doctor and assistant...Have to keep my leg propped up and make sure I do some walking (which I did this a.m. around the yard)...I have to keep the ace bandages on the leg ankle to thigh for the next two weeks but get to take it off at bed time...The other leg will be done when their schedule allows for it..Thank You for your kind thoughts..Our wedding anniversary was on Sept 5th it would have been 65 yeara..I came home and my daughter pointed out one single small cluster of Bridal Wreath had bloomed facing the house...Now this bush generally blooms in early June..I take it as a sign that hubby was with me....She took a picture of it and I'll leave the bloom on the bush to go it's natural waiy...

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Honored Social Butterfly

[9/6/24] OUR MISSING TEAM MEMBERS!!!  ☹

 

Hmmm, I still have three MIA's - HOPING you guys will stop by when you feel up to it. MISSING YOU BIG TIME!!!

 

MC @mc6844 , Allen @Therapist4u and Kim @KimberlyM389662 

 

Luv you,

Nicole  πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—

 

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Silver Conversationalist

Hi Nicole  thank you for your kind thoughts. I hope that you and Cadee and Jonibee and all on the forum are doing well and overcoming issues. You're all in my thoughts and prayers!

Silver Conversationalist

Thank you Nicole. I've missed all of you. In my thoughts and prayers. Lots of house stuff has been dealt with here. Very tiring. I wish you all well with your health and home and pets. I hope to stop by more often to see how you all are. Please take good care of yourselves. I'm sure your love ones have their eye on you always. 

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Esteemed Social Butterfly

I know what you mean by having a hard time going to the same doctor because I too went through this and it was hard facing the doctor and staff..Yesterday would have been the anniversary of marriage of 65 years but I lost him after 63 years..a bitter-sweet day ..Because of my appt. for mapping of veins in preparation of todays surgery , I didn't have time to dwell on it..I look for today to be over in hopes of restoring normalness to my left leg..and down the line the other..I'm more worried about putting the darn compression stocking on even tho it has a zipper it's still tug and pull. Especialliy in the humid day that is expected..Oh well I have to think of the outcome from it..Thank You for your kind thoughts..

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Bronze Conversationalist

Wishing you well on your surgery.  I guess going on 81 has brought on something similar for me.  I thought I had a blood clot in my leg and have been unable to walk.  Went to the cardiologist (took me 3 months to get an appointment) yesterday and he said it is not a blood clot.  Thank God  My next step is the rheumatologist that I see in November!  I guess it is difficult for the heart to pump the blood through my body or I need different medication from the rheumatologist to eliminate all this pain.  I have no idea what is causing the pain.

 I have been using the compression stockings and the electronic boots trying to eliminate the pain.  Getting old is h***.    I hope all goes well for you as I know how difficult it is to walk when in such pain.  

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Honored Social Butterfly

[9/6/24] You are welcome dear Jonibee @jonibee and YES, time for your PAIN to go away my friend. Time for YOU to be able to RETURN to life in whatever way YOU choose. Luv you, Nicole  πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—

 


[*** JONIBEE wrote: I know what you mean by having a hard time going to the same doctor because I too went through this and it was hard facing the doctor and staff..Yesterday would have been the anniversary of marriage of 65 years but I lost him after 63 years..a bitter-sweet day ..Because of my appt. for mapping of veins in preparation of todays surgery , I didn't have time to dwell on it..I look for today to be over in hopes of restoring normalness to my left leg..and down the line the other..I'm more worried about putting the darn compression stocking on even tho it has a zipper it's still tug and pull. Especialliy in the humid day that is expected..Oh well I have to think of the outcome from it..Thank You for your kind thoughts..***]
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Esteemed Social Butterfly

I will definately do that  ..

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Regular Contributor

IMG_3914.jpegMarcy I’m glad your doctor continues to support you.  I seem to want to be around people that knew my husband in all his paths of life.  They seem to understand my loss better than people that never knew him.  Your shared doctor knows your pain.

 

I’m over powered with grief.  First my husband died in December of 2023, next his mother that I was the care giver to passed in June of this year and several days ago I lost a day old great grand daughter.  She was born with a tumor and was being prepared for surgery and died before.  Next Saturday is mother-in-law funeral.  

I continue to look for a silver lining in my life.  Sadie my husband’s dog continues to be best friend.  She allows me to smother her in hugs and kisses because I don’t have Mark anymore.  She was sleeping with me but she rolled out of bed and hit the floor.  Poor girl!   She now only jumps up to say good night.  


Ohhhhhh something must be bright and beautiful out there! 

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Bronze Conversationalist

  Beautiful dog.

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Esteemed Social Butterfly

The eyes are the picture of the soul..It makes you wonder what is this dog thinking or living its own memories..Such a wistful looking dog ..handsome and beautiful markings...

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Regular Contributor

Jonibee blessings on your surgery today❀️

Sadie does speak with her eyes. She keeps her eyes on me for sure.  I think her daddy told her to when he was alone with her when he was passing.  I can only imagine his conversation.  She was all he had. 

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Silver Conversationalist

My jusband and I shared the same primary care doctor. On the numerous occasions when he was unable to go to medical appointments alone, I went with him. I spent a lot of time in the doctor's office and not under pleasant circumstances. Making an appointment for my own annual exam was one of the most difficult things I did after the passing of my husband. The thought of going to that office and talking with the doctor (as much as I like him) set off a wave of grief and sadness. I knew that making my appointment and going, was necessary as part of my self care. I wanted to keep my doctor so it had to be done. I went to the appointment and yes I cried when I started speaking with the doctor. He totally understood my response and that he was a trigger for me. I'm very grateful for the care he gave to my husband and for the understanding and ongoing care he provides to me. 

 

Take care of yourself even if it means making some difficult decisions. Think it through and you will come up with a plan that is right for you.

 

Marcy

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