Prevention is the best medicine when it comes to avoiding surprise medical bills! Learn more.

 

Reply
Info Seeker
0
Kudos
527
Views

Re: AARP Caregiving Summer Break Contest

527 Views
Message 231 of 1,088

I am my fathers POA and have cared for him since 2009, a year after he was diagnosed with neurological complications (brain injury) causing onset of dimentia. My father was on a quiet Sunday drive on a country road on the same weekend as families celebrate the 4th of July. During this time my father noticed two motorcycles approached the side of his vehicle, while he continued to drive the other motorist began to perform wheelies and become wreckless, at that time my father chose to slow down so he could move to the side of the road. At that time a third motorist driving a motorcycle slammed into his vehicle, he respectfully exits the vehicle to confirm the well-being of the individual, while he is surrounded by at this time 10 individuals which who are friends of the individual. Two men approach my father while one assaults him and takes him to the ground and continually kicking him in the frontal lobe causing him to blackout. The individuals grabbed their friends and fled the seen leaving a 72 hour investigation to take place. While my father was flown to shock trauma for immediate surgery and after 16 hours we were told he would stay in a medicated coma with his left portion of his skull removed to help reduse the swelling while the brain is draining and the blood clots continue to be monitored. He awakened over a month later to no conversation, mobility nor knowing how to eat. Seeing the man that I called my father lay in front of me so lifeless how could another being do a thing?  After some time physical therapy as well as speech would slowly have him not as frustrated with his quality of life. However prior to being transferred to a specialty hospital we were told his brain was severed and unfortunately we did not know what to expect. During intense rehab legs and arms became more than noodles and he was able to chew more and light up when I and my children would walk in. Over two years until my father is accepted into a program for individuals with brain trauma and the transition for him was challenging. My mother decided she was unable to care for him and would need to move on and my sibling chose to not face the situation. Leaving myself and my husband to assist in anyway possible. Life was challenging while we had 6 small children at the time as now they are teen and still challenge his visits. However seeing my father transition into a assistant facility with life restrictions after working his entire life was the next hurdle, while trying to figure out ways to not make him feel less of a person and close to our family as possible, even with being  an hour away. Here we are today 10 years from the accident and I look at the accomplishments he has made as an individual as well as a new person. He has concussion due to the dementia onset and frustrations that follow brain trauma patients however he wants to travel and experience life as he never did before. Taking his first trip to Miami last year while being monitored by his home aids, he was able to feel like a person with a purpose. Having a facility dictate all of his moves has been a challenge and he feels as if he were in prison. I enjoy my time with my father since he is a man I can have hour conversations with and remember the little moments. Not taking life for granted or those in your life is how we raise our children, as we never know what road they may travel could be there last. - Grateful Daddy’s Girl. 

Report Inappropriate Content
Tags (1)
0
Kudos
527
Views
Info Seeker
0
Kudos
533
Views

Re: AARP Caregiving Summer Break Contest

533 Views
Message 232 of 1,088

My favorite summer vacation happened this year.

I took my parents to france for the first time, it was insane.

Seen the eiffel tower, went to the louvre, ate authentic food.

I've never seen them more happy, god bless.

Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
533
Views
Info Seeker
0
Kudos
557
Views

Re: AARP Caregiving Summer Break Contest

557 Views
Message 233 of 1,088

hello all

Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
557
Views
Info Seeker
0
Kudos
635
Views

Re: AARP Caregiving Summer Break Contest

635 Views
Message 234 of 1,088

I cared for my father for over eight years. He was a stubborn diabetic who also had heart disease and kidney failure.

Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
635
Views
Info Seeker
0
Kudos
656
Views

Re: AARP Caregiving Summer Break Contest

656 Views
Message 235 of 1,088

This is the opportunity to do for her what she did for me growing up. She is the best and deserves it.

Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
656
Views
Info Seeker
0
Kudos
671
Views

Re: AARP Caregiving Summer Break Contest

671 Views
Message 236 of 1,088

AARP Caregiving Summer Break Contest

 

When we were kids, we wanted to spend our Summer vacation at Disneyland. But every year Dad said, your grandmother is very old and she might not be there next year. We should visit her (5 states away) instead. She lived until I was in my late thirties.

I think that we should not wait for someone to die to go on vacation. If Grandmother doesn't want to go to Disneyland with us, maybe we should take turns doing what we really want. I have a few fond memories of Grandmother, sure. But I also resented her for something that wasn't her choice at all.

Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
671
Views
Info Seeker
0
Kudos
675
Views

Re: AARP Caregiving Summer Break Contest

675 Views
Message 237 of 1,088

KimberlyK,

 

You are very right when you said you can't plan for being a caretaker. My family and I were on our way to a family reunion out of state when traffic came to a stop on a major highway. A young lady not paying any attention rear ended us. My husband suffered the worst with a closed head brain injury. His health has steadily declined from that day forward to the point were he has been hospitalized more times than I can count.

Spend as much time as you can with your dad because time waits for no one.

Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
675
Views
Conversationalist
0
Kudos
666
Views

Re: AARP Caregiving Summer Break Contest

666 Views
Message 238 of 1,088

 

WEEK 4 WINNING POST

 

Summer Breaks might not always be getting away for a vacation. The breaks I'm able to have with my mom is driving out of town for doctor appointments. It might sound strange, but it's something both my mom and me look forward to doing. After every doctor visit or going to hospital for tests, when we are done we stop and get us a bite to eat, before we head for home. We love sitting and talking about our food. How it looks, how it tastes, how good it is or even how bad it is. It's something we both enjoy and each time it is a break for the both of us. We're getting out of the house and I don't have to cook or wash dishes and the best part of all is I'm still getting to spend my time with the most wonderful woman in the world.

Debbie
Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
666
Views
Info Seeker
0
Kudos
631
Views

Re: AARP Caregiving Summer Break Contest

631 Views
Message 239 of 1,088

It is hard to be in the middle of husband, kids, work and caregiver! I understand about your mom waiting until you get home to ask for help with things, because my mom is the same way! You deserve time with your husband and kids, and they deserve time with you, that does not include your mother. If there is an agency in your town, like Visiting Angels, that can come once or twice a week to help, and maybe create a schedule with her neighbors that are willing to help, and give her the schedule - explain that you are taking time to be with your family. You have described your mother as kind and loving, so I am sure that she will understand your need for some "me" time. You have to realize that you deserve that time, it does not make you horrible!!! You cannot give your best as a caretaker when you are run-down and frustrated! It took me a few years to realize that truth, and now I have a much better relationship with my mother and my family. I will keep you in my prayers!

Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
631
Views
Info Seeker
0
Kudos
605
Views

Re: AARP Caregiving Summer Break Contest

605 Views
Message 240 of 1,088

Took my mom to the beach on vacation , it was very difficult as not many hotels were handicap friendly but we did eventually find one and had a decent time.

Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
605
Views
cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 
Users
Announcements

Share your best experiences traveling while caregiving.


woman taking selfie with man in wheelchair on the beach

Top Authors