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Ladies 70 and older - share your tips for dating sites

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Ladies 70 and older - share your tips for dating sites

So many women and so few men - how to attract and find a guy I'd be interested in?  New to dating sites and wondering best way to navigate them.  Snowflake

 

 

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Contributor

I will like to talk to you sometimes . Nice conversation . Please write me whenever you get this . 

 

Thanks

Raymond

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Newbie

where do you find men to date that are sincere and genuine?

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Super Contributor

That's a tough one; most men don't know how to be since and genuine.

 

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Periodic Contributor

t216498c
Info Seeker
‎02-29-2020 09:55 AM
where do you find men to date that are sincere and genuine?

 

Dear Info Seeker:

 

When I read your question one word stood out to me in the inquiry. "Find." The word infers that something is lost. In order to find something, someone, or certain attributes those things and that one would have to be lost.

 

The presumption in the word is that these men are lost. I do not believe that sincere and genuine men (and women) are lost and that they do not joyfully exist in the contemporary dating environment that we have today. I recommend "seek" them in the entire marketplace of life. In supermarkets, libraries, senior centers, your local church, at the theater, grandchildren's school events and through volunteerism. These are a few places where you may meet sincere and genuine people. I prefer the word, "Seek." Seeking is a word that carries the connotation that you are expecting to encounter that which you already believe to exist. No one sees inside any one's heart yet God and His Word, (yes, the Bible) "is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart." - (Hebrews 4:12 KJV)

 

There are sincere, honest and authentically genuine people that still live here with us on planet earth. So sincerity and genuinity are those attributes that are revealed over time by the content of a person's goodly character and the expressions of their mouth. At 70 years of age, (or even coming close to age 70) one has heard a lot of people talk and observed a lot of people with or without good character. Like all things in life as we age we begin to become more discerning and capable of determining a silver nickel from a wooden one and a genuinely sincere person from a phony. 

 

I reiterate your question, "where do you find men to date that are sincere and genuine?" 

I say "seek" and ye shall "discover" them in the secret place that is in the intimacy of your own sincere and genuine heart and through wise counsel in conversations with God.  

 

Exerpted from my post on ‎05-12-2017 05:01 AM:  "And to all the wonderful ladies 70 and older all the best to you and may you influence and inspire women younger than yourselves to seek authentic, honest and sincere dating counterparts. I believe that your age carries the wisdom gained through your experiences. You carry with you secrets to living that the young only "think" they know. Continue to have zero tolerance for any relationship that does not honor and cherish the rich heritage you gained through time."

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@noblefool Hi there, (I am 60+)  I am sure Ladies 70 and older have a good sense of judgment. I often consider that time takes a person to another level of thinking, feeling and doing. There is just not too much that you have to put up with when you get to be a certain age. And you sure realize that it is not worth it and you just don't have to. When you honestly consider your life at this age you really don't want any "drama." The only kind of "stuff going on" that one may allow in her life once she has become seasoned by time is "joy" and "peace." Anything else is for the younger ones. They are still exploring. At 70+ you may still be learning but you are certainly beyond trying to figure out the things that the young ponder. You got it! You lived it! You know it! And although there is yet still much to grow, expand, refresh and renew and to know in your life, you approach it with wisdom that only comes with time spent living on this planet. 

 

And to all the wonderful ladies 70 and older all the best to you and may you influence and inspire women younger than yourselves to seek authentic, honest and sincere dating counterparts. I believe that your age carries the wisdom gained through your experiences. You carry with you secrets to living that the young only "think" they know. Continue to have zero tolerance for any relationship that does not honor and cherish the rich heritage you gained through time. Some things only come with time. The young need to hear from you and learn so that they will escape some of the erroneous nonsense that is out there in mainstream dating "nowadays." 

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Regular Contributor

Hey there, I was just running by and saw you have some questions.

 

I am mid 50 something and I just want to share my opinion even if my thoughts may same silly.

 

I have a few "men" friends that are 70+ old and are single.  They tell me they will stay single the rest of their days and each one has their reasons as to why.  So there are still plenty of men out there in the world that are single and above 70 years old.

 

Just to give you an idea of what is going on out here in some cases..................the biggest concern most men that are older and wiser then I, tell me that it's just too late to start over and being alone is not so bad.  Some of these men are widowed and choose to remain in Love with their wife even after their spouses passing, which I find admirable.  Some men have been divorced and tried numerous relationships overtime and got tired of being disappointed in having continued failed relationships, regardless of the relationship failure root cause. So while there are some older men on dating sites, their are many men that will never be on them.

 

There are many avenues to finding that special someone for you.  I guess it depends on what a person is looking for and what type of relationship they want or need. One can use dating sites, which do work for some people, and for some people it does not work out so good. I caution a person "on the fast track" quest for someone, and to always remember:

 

"You reap what you sow"

 

I know it can be lonely at times and we often sacrifice our inner desires to be with anybody to just not be alone. The real question is as to what a person wants or needs from another person.

 

I think the best thing for a person to do is to keep their eyes open without looking for something or someone specific. Keep your eyes open and attached to your heart and see if someone is willing to look back inside of you. Be honest and upfront concerning what you want, need, and what your expectations are in a relationship.

 

I think the key is to be honest upfront about yourself on dating sites to hopefully help attract a person that interests you and has the same wants and needs as you.

 

My very best to you and may you find what you are looking for.

 

 

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Trusted Contributor

The biggest barrier to dating past 70 is senseless banter about unfounded concerns. Instead stop wasting time and start engaging with someone who seems interesting. It can begin with a smile and doing something simple. The key is to do an activity together and than one more. Nothing happens without doing things together. All the talk about relationships and expectations are curses guaranteed to sink any ship.

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Regular Contributor

Very good advice Joe. I enjoy reading your comments and am learning from your suggestions. Thank you.

Vash.

 

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Newbie

I agree with you about doing activities together. Just noticed a retired meetup group that is going to watch people become us citizens here in portland downtown and that sounds interesting, how the new water treatment plant works, trying out the latest ice cream parlor or sub shop in town. Small adventures are underrated. Another post mentioned there lack of dance clubs in town what a shame. I am not a good dancer but love music and think that would be a fun way to connect with someone as clumsy as I am.

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Regular Contributor

Hi

I am  a man in early 60s,live in North Jersey,retired veterinarian,no children,looking for fun ,

If this ok drop me a line so we can talk.email me [private email address removed - please use the private messaging function]

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Periodic Contributor

Hello Dr. Johnson......Have you found someone to go for a walk with, have dinner, share stories, have intellegent conversations, dream and travel together?

I'm a young 68,  I go to the gym 5 days a week only to stay healthy.  I am a widow and I am financially independent.  My two sons are both established with no children.  I am also in New Jersey and if you are free please reply.

 

 

 

 

 

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Regular Contributor

Hi Susan

I was so pleased to hear from you.

Yes we can talk.would you like my phone number 

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Periodic Contributor

Hello Dr. Johnson

 

Have a great day!!!

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Regular Contributor

Hi Susan

*personal information removed*

Hope to hear from you.

Enjoy your day.

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Periodic Contributor

 

 

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Regular Contributor

Hi Susan

Still looking.i am 65.active person.can we talk.

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Contributor

Hi Susan im 60 and looking for older woman who are healthy and energetic for a casual relationship and sex. Where does a guy find woman who want the same.Im in south jersey.
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Contributor

Hello Susan. Im more than familiar with your situation. Im 60 and as sexually charged as i was 30 yrs ago.I am attracted to older woman who are healthy and energetic. Im constantly reading about so many woman 60 and 70 looking for friends with sex included. Which is fine for me. I too am in NJ ..the problem for me and maybe others is where woukd we go to find these sexually active woman to meet?

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Regular Contributor

Dear Dr. Johnson:

 

Thank you for your reply.  I can sense your lonliness but I must tell you that I was hoping to find someone closer to my age.  You sound like a very nice person and I truly hope that you find someone in your quest to overcome your lonliness.

 

I am attaching below something I just read and hope you enjoy it.

 

Age is the elegy of elegies.  It has greater impact than death in many ways.  In death you are remembered.  In age, you are far more likely to feel forgotten, sequestered even from the very act of living.

 

There is a loneliness that seeps in as we age.  It is the loneliness that distances ourselves from where we’ve come from and to where we’re going.  We begin to be less and less here and more and more…where?  It is the preoccupation with the where-ness that begins to take over.

 

On the one hand, we’re lonely, even in a crowd; because there are so few, if any, we can talk to about this new moment in our lives. And on the other hand, it does not feel real, even to us.  Age, we know, is nothing but a number.  Except that is isn’t. Things begin to happen to us that make the number real. We begin to be aware that life is slipping between our fingers, like the oil of fine olives, smoothly and steadily, smoothly and regularly, smoothly but inevitably.

 

That’s when we get lonely, not because we are being isolated or ignored, but precisely because we are now in the fullness of life.  Our own.  We are not living the life of the masses anymore.  And our life, we have come to understand, is very different from theirs.

 

We miss the sense of importance that comes with the bustle of middle age.  At least we miss it until we become conscious of the new importance that comes with simply being who we are, rather than simply what we did.  Until that time arrives, there is the feeling that we are all talking to one another under water:  we do not know what they are talking about anymore.  And that is very frightening.  And the people around us, the people we’ve known for a long time, do not understand us either.

 

We miss the intellectual stimulation, sense of achievement, of being needed, that came with the daily problems. We miss having a place to fill.

 

Then we discover that if we’re lonely, it may be because we have not looked around to see who needs us.  A person who is needed – really needed, is never lonely, never isolated, never without purpose in life.  All we need to do is to go out and do something.  The world is waiting for us with open arms.

 

A burden of these years is that we will hole up somewhere and mourn our age, our change in life, our losses.

 

A blessing of these years is that we will make ourselves available to the world that is waiting for us, even now, even here.

 

Good luck to you in your quest!

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Periodic Contributor

 So beautifully said.Thank you for your words of wisdom. 

Trusted Contributor

Great to meet you. If you want to communicate, use the Private Message function on the community [Please do not expose private information such as email addresses in the public areas of the community]

Trusted Contributor

Please send mea picture and your number so we can talk

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Oh for goodness sakes.  Why don't the older men realize that we older women do NOT want to get married again!  We just like to have a partner to dance with and go to the movies with or to some social events.  Do not suffer from seriousness - we are not kids any longer or still in high school.  Most of us have been around the block several times.  AND - we don't need their  money either.  I have enough money to support me for the rest of my life.  We just like to still have fun!  I am 86 years old and I still love to dance - I belong to two country line dancing groups and two bowling teams.  I also run a self-help mental help program and have done this for the past 38 years.  As long as you have your health - you should keep active.  I also work out at the gym 3 days a week - eat healthy and take vitamins.  We should try to make our later years fun as long as we still have good health!

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My Dear William:

 

I've been on vacation so I am late in getting back to you.

 

Certainly William - you cannot be serious to think that I would line myself up with someone young enough to be  my grandchild.  I am laughing as I write this.  If you are not kidding - then I would like to say that I think you should get some professional counseling.  

 

So, thank you William for the offer but no thanks!  And I hope that you find someone one day that will make you happy.  🙂

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Newbie

i am not quite 70 yet but loved the email printed on aarp. i've always preferred younger men for some reason. perhaps i can related better to a younger man as my mind is very young. i am very curious if you have thought about the limitations an older woman might have and how it could affect you. and you might be a young widower. well, i no longer do dating sites as it is a place for scammers. yet here i am.

best wishes and good luck in finding what you are looking for.

thea

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t216498c
Info Seeker

Re: Ladies 70 and older - share your tips for dating sites
‎02-29-2020 09:53 AM

 

Hi again Thea, 

 

I know I sent a long response to the question you asked about "sincere and genuine men." This response will be much shorter. I promise.

 

I am not yet 70 years of age, either, yet approaching fast. I try to keep it simple. Every age has limitations based on its own chronologics. A relationship with a younger man may be daunting. One must accept with the thrill of a young lover comes the potential of hardships, misunderstandings and the potential of a short lived engagement that can come because of the "gap" in ages. Anyone can hurt anyone. And anyone can get hurt by anyone. Age is a factor when what you are investing is more than a younger man may be willing or even able to invest at the time. The defining factor is choosing love over lust.

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Regular Contributor

Helpful suggestions and input. Thanks for posting.

Anne from Ga.

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Periodic Contributor

RIGHT ON!!  I no longer want my time wasted on nursing and rehearsing old wounds!! Unfortunately men in their 70s may have just lost a spouse..and havent "ventured out" into the REAL WORLD of singleness or have not figured out that we have our own ideas and our own lifestyle and interests and while exchanging "old war stories" may be a "comfortable way" to ease into the new relationship.. but trying to stay in YOUR comfort zone so YOU dont have to learn new things.. think about it.. We don't just want to provide your entertainment and company.. for that you can get a dog.. we want someone who is ready to go and do and dance and laugh and bring new ideas to the fold..

I dont need a "dad".. i'm not looking for a "husband" to cook and clean for.. and please set up some healthy boundaries with your kids.. they may not give you the time of day until they get wind of a "new person" in your life.. then be aware they fear being cut out of your precious belongings that I don want in the first place..  thank you for my "vent"  been there done that.. and still a believer ready willing and able for a Mature relationship.. 

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Periodic Contributor

Everything you said is so right on! Love your honesty and your spunk!

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