🕯 A Place To Be With OTHERS Who Are Grieving! WE support each other.

[Spring2025]

THIS GROUP IS OPEN TO ALL GRIEVERS NO MATTER HOW LONG IT HAS BEEN [years,days].

To participate, click on reply button at bottom of this post. Enter your comment. Click on reply again.

Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗  (Grief Forum)

[Spring2025]

📸  Attachment  📸  So Marcy @MarcyW882921 , you get YOUR HOUR BACK THIS SUNDAY!!! Lol, I remember you donot like losing it.  🤣😂

[MarcyW882921]

I am thrilled to have the extra hour! I loved getting up with a little bit of light this morning.❤️🌞

Marcy

[Spring2025]

Unfortunately I have NOT Cadee @Cadee2719 !!!  ☹

But I will probably need one as I AGE so please keep me posted on what you select. Thanks!!!

Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗  (Grief Forum)

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[*** CADEE wrote: I have a question:  I am looking into buying a medical alert system.  In my research I am finding that the range is limited both in home and GPS service outside my home.  Also the battery does not last a long time and has to be recharged often.  Has anyone purchased a system that they like and would recommend?  I would appreciate any input.  Thank You  ***]

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[Cadee2719]

  I have a question:  I am looking into buying a medical alert system.  In my research I am finding that the range is limited both in home and GPS service outside my home.  Also the battery does not last a long time and has to be recharged often.  Has anyone purchased a system that they like and would recommend?  I would appreciate any input.  Thank You

[MarcyW882921]

Cadee @Cadee2719 , 

We used Medical Guardian for my Mom. She didn't have it very long and hardly used it so I can't say much about the service. The sales people were professional and helpful, the price was in line with other services, and the reviews were quite positive.

I hope that helps.

Marcy

[Spring2025]

Hi Susan @SusanR479241 and Lisa @LisaJP6763 , I hope you will stop by again when you can/feel up to it!!!

Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗  (Grief Forum)

[LisaJP6763]

hey girl, I've been thinking about you, I hope you're doing well!  This back thing really has me struggling.  Surgery is scheduled for Friday morning.  Hoping to feel better shortly after that. Other than that just trudging along, trying to get through the day and get some sleep.  I'll check back in later in the weekend.

[MarcyW882921]

Lisa @LisaJP6763 , 

I hope your surgery went well today. May you get relief from your pain and recover quickly from your surgery.

Marcy

[Spring2025]

Marcy @MarcyW882921 , how are you TODAY?

Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗  (Grief Forum)

[MarcyW882921]

I got a migraine yesterday on my 13 hour work day. I'm thankful for medication that works even though I don't like the price of it! 6 ½ hours today and the next two days.

Marcy

[Spring2025]

Hmmm, WORK DAY Marcy @MarcyW882921 ???

Did you get a job?  🤔🤔🤔

Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗  (Grief Forum)

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[*** MARCY wrote: I got a migraine yesterday on my 13 hour work day. I'm thankful for medication that works even though I don't like the price of it! 6 ½ hours today and the next two days.

Marcy ***]

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[MarcyW882921]

No, it's just a short-term thing with the election season. I'm almost finished.

Marcy

[MarcyW882921]

Doing well...just crazy busy right now. My regular activities and additional volunteering during the election season have me pretty tied up but in a good way.

Marcy

[Spring2025]

🙏  Cadee @Cadee2719 , my thoughts are with you today for your brother and health.

Now that you are back home, I hope you will continue with your self care.

You remind me of my grandparents. They gave SO MUCH of themselves when they were alive like you are for your brother and his wife.

Sad, with their death, our family has now become selfish and backstabbing.

Lol, you need to adopt me.

Anyway, just wanted to check on you.

Hmmm, looking forward to hearing about your binoculors (misspelled  🙄)  NEXT Spring. I bet your backyard will be FULL of grateful birds at your feeder.  🙃🙃🙃

My daughter left for Chicago yesterday. Will return home Wednesday.

Hmmm, any medical updates?  🤔🤔🤔

Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗  (Grief Forum)

[Cadee2719]

 Hi Nicole and all!  Yes, I am home and exhausted!  My brother is slowly recovering and will require more surgery on his eye.  Having macular degeneration in both eyes has not helped.  He needs to repair the injured eye to have any hope of seeing anything out of it.  I will be seeing the rheumatologist November 6.  I am also going to ask for a referral to a vascular doctor (as Jonibee suggested) as the pain in my legs continues.  My goal is to take care of my medical issues. I will be 81 in a few weeks and would like to spend my remaining time without daily pain. On October 30 it will be two years since my husband died.  It will be a quiet day for me.  Next day is Halloween and I have been told by the kids in the neighborhood that there are A LOT OF THEM that will come for candy!   😃 They are sweet and keep me smiling.    Chicago??? Wow

Is that someplace you would consider moving to if she found a job there?  Each day brings a new surprise doesn't it?  I am hoping that everyone here is taking care of themselves and taking  One Step at a Time.  Those that recently lost a loved one are discovering who they truly are and will learn the POWER of the person they will become.   ❤️  The people on this site are here to help you through this journey.

[jonibee]

Cadee..My thoughts are with you to day..The two year anniversary of my husbands passing is Nov.7th..Be at peace...jonibee

[Cadee2719]

  Thank You for your kind thoughts.  I am so thankful that I have a friend that places flowers on the graves for me.  I spent the day being quiet and alone.  It is hard to believe that my husband has been dead for two years.  

[Spring2025]

I am thinking of YOU Jonibee @jonibee !!!

Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗  (Grief Forum)

[jonibee]

I am okay still having the behind the knee bakers cyst problem ..Vascular surgery on the left leg went well the right leg will wait until after the first of the year as that one isn't as bed vein wise. It's coming up to the anniversar of husbands passing of two years..It will be a day of bitter sweet memories for me but I will get through it...My medical appts are being kept at a minimal by choice ..so it's cardio/primary doctor to maintain wellness..I'm not up to anymore tests or prodding unless absolutely necessary..Want to enjoy the holidays that are upcoming in the true sense of them...Keeping Christmas shopping at a minimal don't care to get tied up to the material side of it..Decorating and baking will be fine...I am doing a lot of reading and knitting occassionally so not to aggravate my hands which had carpal tunnel so easy does it..Hoping the holidays are good to all and  Peace to All...

[MarcyW882921]

Jonibee @jonibee ,

I just passed the two year anniversary of my husband's earthly departure. It was emotional for me but also healing. I wish you strength and peace as you go through your anniversary.

I'm glad your surgery went well and that you are thinking through your medical needs for wellness,

Marcy

[SusanR479241]

Hi Friends, Fall has been a disaster for me and this fall is no exception.  August 20, was my birthday and no husband to celebrate it with.  Ten days later, September 1 is our anniversary and Jim is not here, October 1 is Jim's birthday and coming up November 6 is the day Jim died.  These dates have been hard this year, maybe even harder than the first time.  I don't know why.  Does anyone have suggestions for how to get through November 6?  Please, anything no matter how serious or silly, I appreciate your experience and thoughts.  Thank you very much, Susan

[MarcyW882921]

Wow Susan @SusanR479241 you have a lot of dates to deal with in close proximity! Sometimes we feel worse on the days before a milestone event because we get caught up in the anticipation. Thinking about potential triggers and making plans is a healthy approach. If you want to face your feelings, you could: spend time where you feel close to Jim, talk to Jim, write a letter to him, spend time with people who knew you and Jim, and/or do things that brings back memories of your times with Jim. If you want a distraction from thoughts about your loss you could: take a little trip, go to a movie, plan an outing with friends, do something that you wouldn't have done with Jim but you find it enjoyable, eat foods that you like and Jim wouldn't eat,  and/or change something in your house that you have been wanting to do. I'm throwing out a range of things as potential ideas or ones that will spark some other options. This journey is so individual so do what feels good to you. 

Wishing you all the best Susan.

Marcy

[SusanR479241]

Dear Marcy, I appreciate your response to my situation and giving me options and suggestions.  They are good ones.  It is so nice to put out there what is going on in my life and have people respond.  Thank you, Susan

[MarcyW882921]

Susan @SusanR479241 ,

I just wanted to let you know I am thinking of you today. 

Hugs.

Marcy

[MarcyW882921]

You're welcome Susan. I hope you are getting through the month a step at a time and I know you have another date coming up in a few weeks. Every event is a challenge and I have confidence that you will find a way to negotiate it.

Marcy

[Spring2025]

📸  Attachment  📸 

Lisa @LisaJP6763 , Nosey Nicole wants to know about your YESTERDAY Garage Sale.  🙄🙄🙄

Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[LisaJP6763]

Again, a total bust. Not a single soul showed up.  I guess I'm just going to have to donate that whole house full of stuff.  ☹️  Got a few more thing we discovered we needed.  Discovered today, back home, that we need to get the medical equipment we left there.  What's out here that his parents had is old and worn out.  I put it out on the curb and posted a curb alert in my FB groups around here.  My stuff was purchased new, shortly before my mother passed away in 2019, 36 hours after I brought her home.

[MarcyW882921]

Sorry Lisa that you are dealing with the "stuff" on top of your loss. It can be frustrating and draining.

Marcy

[SusanR479241]

• Hi all.  I just found this group today.  My husband of 60 years passed away Nov.6 2022.  I can't seem to integrate my new life with the old one.  When he died it was an earthquake, the earth split into two halves and I am unable to seam them together.  I have a foot on one side of the split and the other foot on the opposite split.  It is splitting me apart.  A volcano exploded and caused the earthquake and the volcano is still erupting inside of me.  I have aftershocks frequently; they are very painful, and I become depressed for days or weeks.  
•     I have no one else to tell this to so I appreciate being able to put it out there in print.

[MarcyW882921]

Hi Susan @SusanR479241 and I'm sorry for your loss. Welcome to the group...we are glad you found us. I know it isn't a club or group you wanted to join and we feel the same way. I too was relieved to find a place where I could express my feelings at any time of the day or night. Writing on this forum and in a journal were both beneficial in my journey.

Sixty years is a long time to be married to someone! Situational depression is very common however it becomes a concern if it ends up being chronic. If you feel like you need help identifying your type of depression, contact a professional for an assessment.

It has been said that at the moment your loved one dies, your life is totally changed and you are no longer the person you were when that person was in your life. It doesn't mean however that your love for them or your memories with them are gone. They will remain with you and hopefully become a source of comfort rather than a trigger for grief and sadness. Initially I felt like I had a giant hole in my chest where my heart and love used to be. My soul was lost and my waves of sadness were unpredictable.

I'm curious as to where you may have looked for support during your struggle. People share ideas here for places to go, available resources, and things we have tried. Even though groups are not in my comfort zone, I had a positive experience joining a bereavement group. I think my participation was instrumental in validating my feelings and sanity while building a sense of support and community.

Wishing you some relief from the volatile internal weather you are experiencing.

Marcy