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How to Recover After Dealing with Hardship

Resilience means having the ability to rebound from hardship and approach each day with determination that you'll thrive. Resilience comes from within, but you can learn ways to build resilience through practice. Explore the Building Resilience Challenge, one of four challenges in the Staying Sharp(R) Mental Well-Being Challenge Series. Visit AARP® Staying Sharp® for more information.

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Social Butterfly

My attitude is that I’ll kick the problem's butt, not vice versa!

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Resiliency is a very important aspect to support aging!  I'm with Betty White .. 'Getting old ain't for sissies!'. Recognizing we have loss and that grief is a natural response to loss is very important.   As we experience more and more losses they can accumulate and rip open old scars.  Our choice is give in or focus on what we have in front of us in this moment.  Maybe it's less but it's something. Recognize your strength and determination. Grow it.  That's what resiliency is, not quitting just because it's hard. There is potential satisfaction in that and joy around the corner if we let it in.

Periodic Contributor

It’s really really hard I am a witness and I’m living it but I’m trusting in a higher power,, my ancestors like grandma and grandpa that  instealed or at least tried to from their experiences and life struggles accomplishments about this thing we call life and they’re no longer here as in gone way to soon left with spiritual and so many memories that are actually true and now I’m reliving experiencing all the above but it’s so hard when in the middle of the age storm however it’s still so much to be thankful for and make certain those things are expressed to self and the younger ones to know that maybe now they’re not experiencing getting older and so full of youth but try to remember that the days are gonna come and it gets hard no to mention an old saying is we get better in time and I thank you so much for your post and allowing me to reply,,again a valuable lesson learned that it’s so much to be thankful for when we gets a certain age and feel like all is lost if only for a moment,,again thank you.

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Hmmm, I think anyone who is old enough to choose to read an AARP post like this one is old enough to have already had their resilience seriously tested. Physical hardship, economic hardship, mental health hardship, relationship hardship; at least one and probably some complicated mix of more than one have already shown up on your doorstep at some point and refused to leave. Although “ … approaching each day with determination that you’ll thrive” is an inspiring aspiration, here’s the thing: If that has not been your natural “go to” mindset in the face of hardship, you can’t suddenly become a convert and expect some magic bullet. Better to summon whatever strengths have gotten you this far — and you know what they are, even if you wish they’d done their job better.

Periodic Contributor

1 I will extol thee, O Lord; for thou hast lifted me up and hast not made my foes to rejoice over me.

2 O Lord, my God, I cried unto thee, and thou hast healed me.

3 O Lord, thou hast brought up my soul from the grave; thou hast kept me alive, that I should not go down to the pit.

4 Sing unto the Lord, O ye saints of his, and give thanks at the remembrance of his holiness.

5 For his anger kindleth against the wicked; they repent, and in a moment it is turned away; and they are in his favor, and he giveth them life; therefore, weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.

6 And in my prosperity I said, I shall never be moved.

7 Lord, by thy favor thou hast made my mountain to stand strong; thou didst hide thy face, and I was troubled.

8 I cried to thee, O Lord; and unto the Lord I made supplication.

9 When I go down to the pit, my blood shall return to the dust. I will praise thee; my soul shall declare thy truth. For what profit am I if I do it not?

10 Hear, O Lord, and have mercy upon me; Lord, be thou my helper.

11 Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing; thou hast put off my sackcloth and girded me with gladness,

12 To the end that my soul may give glory to thy name, and sing praise to thee, and not be silent. O Lord, my God, I will give thanks unto thee forever.
I'm pretty sure this is the one he wrote that mourned a stillborn child.

I especially love the latter half of verse 5: "Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning."

 

Periodic Contributor

So being resilient and having resilience is great but then it last for a spell then I’m right back in thoz depressed moves even crying spells 

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Periodic Contributor

Tears can be cathartic- which is good; it all depends which brain chemical is released in the process (I collected it on Pinterest a while back).
The research is still hazy and controversial, but I think there's something to it.  I've noticed that when I've decided to vent, sometimes it's helped and sometimes it didn't.  I tried to sort of keep track of what did and didn't work, and stick to what worked.  It got better, eventually.

Periodic Contributor

  • I’m exactly the same about tears that don’t always mean weak scared instead powerful happy to know that we have reached and went further into realities that we were told about in early age and yet it does last for a second it gets you down for a second life as we know has so many ups downs uncertainties it’s crazeee but again so much to live for be thankful for when resilience does kicks in and can move forward or even when we’re stuck with tears unanswered questions again it’s exactly what life is about 
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Periodic Contributor


@GinaB566599 wrote:

Tears can be cathartic- which is good; it all depends which brain chemical is released in the process (I collected it on Pinterest a while back).
The research is still hazy and controversial, but I think there's something to it.  I've noticed that when I've decided to vent, sometimes it's helped and sometimes it didn't.  I tried to sort of keep track of what did and didn't work, and stick to what worked.  It got better, eventually.


 

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Periodic Contributor

I really genuinely love you guys for so many posts so many views about age resilience it’s definitely a lesson in progress plus a valuable gift that keeps giving when so many people can connect make comments about just about everything and I am thankful 

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