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Been married for 28 years in the verge of divorce cant make it past infedility

For the last 15 years my sexual drive has declined, having 3 kids and an extremely busy with them and for years being a major bread winner in the finances and dealing with fluctuating income from my husband and lots of job changs on his part has forced me to carry alot of extra work load ontop of my daily dutues at home and with the kids and extreme weight gain on his part! and the worst of it catching him online cheating multuple times over the years and this last time the online lead to an actual affair in person! He claims ive never been a good wife and my lack of sex drive forced him into seeking out women littering of all ages to give him what i haven't for 15 years! I dont have the luxury of being married to a man that can truly admit any fault of his own and i have never stopped loving him no matter but im unsure whether to stay or go. The trust issues and daily struggles are real.

I had a brief emotional affair so to speak about 13 years ago and all he seemed to want to do is throw that in my face and tell me even though it waa just 1 man 1 time its not the number thar counts and it is unspoken that i am in fact a cheater and can not call him one without owing my wring doing. I have and made a promise years ago to never make a mistake like that again and haven't yet all these years later he says he cant trust me

But expects me to movw on with the knowledge of actually reading the explicit sexual content of his online cheating and also knowing he met one girl several times to get blow jobs! 

In his mind my lack of sex drive has caused all the problems

 He says he has an extremely high drive and even when i would have said the sex normal he says it has nevee been enough...

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