Is Thank You a senior hang up?

[VickieF426693]

  “It’s implied “ my daughter-in-law replied. I had just remarked that I had not received a Thank You note for the gift I had brought to a shower a few weeks earlier. I wondered if  it would be implied that I meant to buy a gift if I’d shown up with an empty gift bag! 

Notes  are not the only acknowledgements that are going away…not even a nod if you open a door or let someone with one avocado  and a candy bar go ahead of you in line at the grocery store. What have your experiences been with what I consider to be common courtesy?

I guess I just need to remember my daughter-in-law”s last words on the subject. “Our  generation is just not hung up on formalities” she noted and ended with “By the way You’re  Welcome!”

      . 

[LisaS961881]

Vickie,

   I just read your post, so I hope that you don’t mind my belated reply and my humble opinion.

From all that you have shared, I believe that your initial feeling about the recipient of your gift was correct - not being thanked for a gift is rude.

   I am only judging from my experience, but I was personally thanked for both Bridal Shower gifts that I gave this past year - both brides are in their twenties - not seniors.

just this past week, I was thanked for allowing a driver to merge in front of me in bumper-to bumper traffic (a wave, a mouthed “thank you”, and an additional wave), for throwing an errant ball back to a group of ten-year-old boys, and by a cashier in her forties, who realized that I had taken the time to write an extensive review of how well she managed a truly nasty customer that was ahead of me in line. (Two weeks later she recognized me and was effusive in her thanks. )

….your post made me think about that Maya Angelou quote -

    ~ You will forget what people say, and you will forget what people do, but you will never forget how they made you feel. ~

For what it’s worth, I too would have questioned why I had not been thanked and would have thought my gift was unappreciated.

Hope that you had a great weekend!

~ Lisa

[SereneSeagull]

I hear you that it wasn’t your daughter in law, but I think it’s her cavalier response to today’s lack of acknowledgement, that maybe she too, subscribes to that philosophy?  I don’t think that response as to explaining that as a reason these days would be so welcomed by me.  

[nctarheel]

Thank you's for holding a door, thank you's for giving up a place in line, thank you notes for gifts, greeting cards, personal letters, and other pleasantries are all dead....... victims of today's social media, texting, and other forms of "modern" communication with one another. Sad isn't it, @VickieF426693 ?????

[VickieF426693]

  Yikes, I really gave you the wrong impression. My daughter-in-law is great. She was trying to make me feel better that I did not receive a thank you note from a bride I had given a shower gift. I am very lucky to have such a wonderful daughter-in-law. I am thankful for that I think  should send her a Thank You note!

[VickieF426693]

Oh gosh I really gave you all the wrong impression…my daughter in law is great! I was complaining to her about a shower I attended . The bride did not send a thank you note and I thought that was frankly,rude. My daughter in-law was trying to make me feel better!!!…SHE WAS NOT THE PERSON BEING RUDE! 

[papawofboo]

A habit that I try to keep is to read my post at least twice before I hit reply.

[papawofboo]

My advice to you is to have a good heart to heart with your son. There is a lot of great moments coming with grandchildren but I get the feeling she doesn't care if you are in on them.

As far as common courtesy, I am more surprised when it happens than when it doesn't.  And I think the reason for this is THE PHONE.