WE ARE SORRY for your loss 💛

[SummerOnTheWay1]

THIS GROUP IS OPEN TO ALL GRIEVERS NO MATTER HOW LONG IT HAS BEEN [years,days].

To participate, click on reply button at bottom of this post. Enter your comment. Click on reply again.

Grief & Loss Team  🤗

[SummerOnTheWay1]

📎  Well said MC @mc6844 !!! I started counseling last month and glad I did. Found out it is very "healthy" to avoid TOXIC folks. They DRAIN you and keep on going.

Luv,

Nicole. ‌🤗‌‌🤗‌‌🤗‌  (Grief Forum)

‌➡️‌[*** MC 

@mc6844 wrote:
I encourage those on the forum to just keep going. Sometimes we have a tough day or sleepless night. Maybe troubled souls cross our path. Or just trying to keep ourselves and lives together during these times. We slowly learn not to present ourselves in a vulnerable manner. And still be loving individuals. Time takes time. We are living in answered prayer.

[dw53874168]

I lost my husband of 49 years in February.  It’s been 6 months now & it just isn’t getting better. I cry every night. I stay so busy during the day just so I don’t think about it. 

[SummerOnTheWay1]

[Monday 4/27/26]

Dear @dw53874168 , I am thinking about YOU.

How are you doing TODAY?

Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗  (Grief Forum)

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➡️[*** @dw53874168 wrote:

I lost my husband of 49 years in February.  It’s been 6 months now & it just isn’t getting better. I cry every night. I stay so busy during the day just so I don’t think about it. 

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[l124289r]

I am not convinced "tis better to have loved and lost . . . " but I do envy you and others their long relationships. I have never married, lost my career, was diagnosed with debilitating illnesses, lost my financial security, lost my lifestyle, lost access to passionate pursuits, lost productive occupation, lost my friends, and lost close family connections. I think it would have been rewarding to have a long-term romantic relationship but it would also be one more loss on my "pile." Getting out from under all that has been almost impossible and I actually just try not to lose more. Unfortunately, now I cling to "things" which cost little to maintain and accept me as I am -- at any given moment! After over 20 years of these changes, I still yearn for the life that I felt I was just building and then the rejection and disregard of people I have cared about. Since I turned 65 this month, I would like to accept and finally let go of how I wanted my life to be. What I have is pathetic to me and has been unacceptable but none of my attempts to improve circumstances has worked. I feel that I have no choice but to shut down and give up every little strand left of my past. But since no substitutions have worked either, I feel like a black hole just closing down, collapsing into myself. If not for my dog . . . . 

[SummerOnTheWay1]

[Monday 4/27/26]

Dear @l124289r , I am thinking about YOU.

How are you doing TODAY?

Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗  (Grief Forum)

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➡️[*** @l124289r wrote:

I am not convinced "tis better to have loved and lost . . . " but I do envy you and others their long relationships. I have never married, lost my career, was diagnosed with debilitating illnesses, lost my financial security, lost my lifestyle, lost access to passionate pursuits, lost productive occupation, lost my friends, and lost close family connections. I think it would have been rewarding to have a long-term romantic relationship but it would also be one more loss on my "pile." Getting out from under all that has been almost impossible and I actually just try not to lose more. Unfortunately, now I cling to "things" which cost little to maintain and accept me as I am -- at any given moment! After over 20 years of these changes, I still yearn for the life that I felt I was just building and then the rejection and disregard of people I have cared about. Since I turned 65 this month, I would like to accept and finally let go of how I wanted my life to be. What I have is pathetic to me and has been unacceptable but none of my attempts to improve circumstances has worked. I feel that I have no choice but to shut down and give up every little strand left of my past. But since no substitutions have worked either, I feel like a black hole just closing down, collapsing into myself. If not for my dog . . . . 

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[SereneSeagull]

Hi, your post touched me.  I don’t know if I have any words that would comfort you, but I do want to tell you that I read your post and I’m sorry for the things that are so overwhelming for you.

What kind of dog do you have?

 I’m a cat person, myself.  Although our cat is not a dog, we try and teach it tricks!  It knows many words, but the best is when we say “squirrel”, he’ll come dashing in the room eager to see it from the window!   

Pets can be a great comfort.  I think many times more than people, if that makes any sense.  I hope your precious dog brings you comfort and love as well.  They can sense we need something too!

[mc6844]

I'm so sorry for the loss of your husband. 49 yrs is a long time. I'm so glad you're stopping in at this forum. There are good people here who have gone through and experiencing what you're going through. Each time you're here you can leave a bit of grief and hopefully feel a little lighter. For those of us who were married young and/or in long relationships we learn new ways of doing things.  A counselor is a good idea. If you're not up to in person then there are online options. It's great that you're teaching out on this forum. The focus is on grief.  This helps us not to ignore our grief. Please take care!

[SummerOnTheWay1]

📎 [8/27/25]@dw53874168 , I am so sorry for your loss dear friend!!!

IF you have any "questions" we do have two totally AWESOME AARP Experts who stop by to SUPPORT us. Jane @JaneCares & Amy @agoyer have also lost people they cared about.

WE are here whenever you NEED us ALWAYS.

Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗  (Grief Forum)

➡️[*** 

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@dw53874168 wrote:

I lost my husband of 49 years in February.  It’s been 6 months now & it just isn’t getting better. I cry every night. I stay so busy during the day just so I don’t think about it. 

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[CeciliaH401383]

I’m so sorry for your loss. My husband and I were married for 52 years when I lost him on Thanksgiving almost 6 years ago. The pain is still there, but it’s manageable, and changes. We just keep doing one day at a time. Some are really hard still, but some are ok too. I’m lucky to have good friends, and family nearby. I hope you have someone who is a willing ear. Two of my closest friends are also widows, and I find it easier to be open with them, because they understand. 

[SummerOnTheWay1]

[Monday 4/27/26]

Dear Cecilia @CeciliaH401383 , I am thinking about YOU.

How are you doing TODAY?

Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗  (Grief Forum)

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➡️[*** CECILIA @CeciliaH401383 wrote:

I’m so sorry for your loss. My husband and I were married for 52 years when I lost him on Thanksgiving almost 6 years ago. The pain is still there, but it’s manageable, and changes. We just keep doing one day at a time. Some are really hard still, but some are ok too. I’m lucky to have good friends, and family nearby. I hope you have someone who is a willing ear. Two of my closest friends are also widows, and I find it easier to be open with them, because they understand. 

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