WE ARE SORRY about your loss 💛

[SummerOnTheWay1]

THIS GROUP IS OPEN TO ALL GRIEVERS NO MATTER HOW LONG IT HAS BEEN [years,days].

To participate, click on reply button at bottom of this post. Enter your comment. Click on reply again.

Grief & Loss Team  🤗

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌📜‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌   “Sometimes all YOU can do is lie in bed and hope to fall asleep before YOU fall apart.” WILLIAM C. HANNAN.

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🕯‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌  DECISIONS that often cause people distress!!!

*** Please "take your time" with these decisions & deal with life the "best" YOU CAN. ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌💛‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

(1) When to SORT through their loved one's belongings.

(2) Whether or not to take OFF their wedding ring.

(3) When to RETURN to work.

(4) How often to VISIT the cemetery.

(5) Whether or not to SELL or move.

[SummerOnTheWay1]

ABOUT OUR GROUP!!!

Peer SUPPORT: Connect with others in similar situations on the AARP Grief & Loss Forum, an active online community where members share stories and offer MUTUAL COMFORT.

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌❌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌️    Myth:

Grieving should last about a YEAR.

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌✅‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌️    Fact:

There is NO specific time frame for grieving. How long it takes DIFFERS from person to person.

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌👣‌‌‌‌‌‌‌   Did YOU take a step TODAY/TONIGHT? Tell us about YOUR STEP!!!

Sometimes it maybe a half a step (not quite where we hoped to be, but you TRIED). ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌👍‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

Those half steps do "help" with moving past your grief = finding peace & comfort.

*** EVERYONE'S step will be DIFFERENT. For some of us, just "getting" out of bed is a CHALLENGE. Celebrate that step when YOU DO!!! And keep on "stepping" IF you can into a DAY/NIGHT FULL OF "possible" comfort & peace. You got this my friend!!! ‌‌‌‌‌‌👍‌‌‌‌‌‌

Grief & Loss Team ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌👍‌‌‌   REMEMBER!!!

We will see our luv ones AGAIN.

Meanwhile, HONOR their "memory" with taking care of yourself (physically, mentally, emotionally).

Yes, WE MISS THEM EVERY DAY & NIGHT.  ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌😞‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

They are WITH US ALWAYS, seeing our "efforts" and luving us.

You got this my friend!!!

Luv,

Nicole  ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌  (Grief Forum)

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌📜‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌    "We start ADAPTING to our new identity, our new life. I’m NOT saying the battle is over and here’s the new me. But a little at a time, we take on these CHANGES that give us more clarity of this new life."  FRANK COMPARATO.

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌👋‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌     "Online" Group WELLNESS CHECKS!!!

[1] WE check on Group Members "online" when WE have NOT heard from them "recently".

[2] WE do "understand" that there are days/nights WE donot feel like "chatting". That is part of OUR JOURNEY to "creating" a life without the person WE lost. ‌‌‌‌‌‌

[3] That is OKAY. Stop by when you do feel like letting us know HOW YOU ARE DOING. We fo care about you always. OUR WELCOME MAT IS ALWAYS OUTSIDE OUR DOOR.

[4] There is NO limit to how long you are a part of this group. Some of us have been participating for YEARS = asking for support & giving support. ‌‌‌‌‌👍‌‌‌‌‌

[5] And we have with us TWO "wonderful" AARP Experts (Amy @agoyer & Jane @JaneCares ) who stop by to offer their words of wisdom for our situations (we post).

Grief & Loss Team ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌📜‌‌‌    Grief is a most peculiar thing; we’re so HELPLESS in the face of it.

It’s like a window that will simply open of its own accord.

The room grows cold, and we can do nothing but shiver.

But it opens a little less each time, and a little less; and one day we wonder what has become of it. ARTHUR GOLDEN.

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌👋‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌  GOOD morning!!!

Another "day" for us to get out of bed, "believing" somehow WE WILL survive while grieving.

Stop by when you can to let us know how you are doing.

Remember to GET BACK UP everytime you fall (stay in bed,depressed,crying and so on).

EVERY TIME you do so = makes you a SURVIVOR.

Someone who "survived" a loss.

Someone who is "creating" a life without someone they cared about.

Keep "stepping" my friend.

I am "thinking" about YOU TODAY!!!

Nicole ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌💛‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌😴‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌     Wishing Everyone REST when they head to bed TONIGHT!!!

Yes, those "sleepless" nights are a CHALLENGE but know that with TIME, they will "decrease". ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌👍‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

‌➡️‌[*** And on those SLEEPLESS nights, stop by if you need to chat or just someone to listen to you. Trust me, one of us are ALSO up = NOT able to sleep = Members Supporting Members. ‌😉‌

You got this my friend!!!

Luv,

Nicole ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌💛‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌♻️‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌    Stop by when YOU CAN to ENCOURAGE OTHERS (respond to THEIR POST) who are grieving.

Or ASK FOR SOME encouragement for YOURSELF during your grief.

WE ALL have days/nights when we need this!!!

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌➡️‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌[*** Members "helping" members ***]‌‌‌‌‌⬅️‌‌‌‌‌

Grief & Loss Team ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌ ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌📋‌‌‌‌‌   Here's Everything You Need to Do When a Loved One Dies (AARP Article)

USE LINK BELOW TO READ THE ARTICLE.

https://www.aarp.org/family-relationships/when-loved-one-dies-checklist/

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🎵‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🎶‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌    Compile a list of YOUR loved ones’ favorite songs or music. Include songs that evoke happy memories and songs that soothe YOU and bring you COMFORT.

*** An excellent way to "relax" or "exercise".

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌🗣‌‌‌   TALKING about YOUR grief can feel awkward, but remember, SOME people want to HELP.

Simply SHARING what you NEED, whether it’s a shoulder to CRY on or an ERRAND done on your behalf, can LIGHTEN your emotional load.

‌‌‌➡️‌‌‌[*** Not everyone will be there for you, but keep searching for the ones who are. Forgive the ones who are NOT & move on to the NEXT person. ‌‌‌👍‌‌‌

[SummerOnTheWay1]

🪔   Maintain Self-Care: Prioritize the basics. Maintain a healthy sleep schedule, eat nutritious meals, and engage in regular exercise.

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌👣‌‌‌‌‌    Did YOU take a step today/tonight? Stop by to tell us about YOUR step(s).

‌‌‌‌‌➡️‌‌‌‌‌[*** Keep stepping to a NEW life everyone. One we will ALWAYS "miss & remember" the people we lost - but HONORING them with seeking ways to MOVE FORWARD.

You got this my friends!!!

Luv,

Nicole (Grief Forum) ‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌📜‌‌    “Never. We never lose our loved ones. They accompany us; they don’t disappear from our lives. We are merely in different rooms.” PAULO COELHO.

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌♻️‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌   Feeling LONELY with the passing of someone you CARED about?

(1) WE are ALWAYS here to "listen, support, chat".

(2) Different TIME ZONES means someone is "available" 24/7.

(3) And our AARP Experts Amy @agoyer & Jane @JaneCares have SUPPORTED us throughout the years.

Have a QUESTION for them - ask away!!!

(4) Keep in mind Group Members & AARP Experts have "experienced" loss TOO = WE UNDERSTAND & SUPPORT EACH GROUP MEMBER.

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌➡️‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌[***Members & AARP Experts helping OTHER members. ***]‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌⬅️‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

Grief & Loss Team  ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌   WE are sending LOTS of "hugs" your way just in case you NEED them "right" now!!!

Grief & Loss Team!

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌📜‌‌‌‌   “It’s possible to go on, no matter how IMPOSSIBLE it seems, and that in time, the grief … LESSENS. It may not go away completely, but after a while, it’s not so overwhelming.” --- NICHOLAS SPARK.

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌👣‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌   Did you take a STEP? Tell us about YOUR STEP!!!

ONE STEP may mean making sure YOU EAT today/tonight.

Sometimes OUR interest in food is gone along with the energy to face EACH day/night. ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

*** Try "snacking & sipping water" IF you are NOT able to consume a regular meal. Doing this "several" times during the day/night will help to keep you hydrated & well.

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌♻️‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌   ARE YOU NEW TO OUR FORUM [Grief & Loss]? ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤔‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

[1] You can either create a NEW POST or JOIN another post created by another member to share YOUR JOURNEY.

[2] IF you need help with anything on THIS SITE, you can "reply" to this post or send me a PM (AARP Private Message).

[3] WE have ALL been "new" at some point & this site can be a "challenge" to use.

Grief & Loss Team ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌ ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌👍‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌    Well guys, WE MADE it thru another day/night!!!

Tomorrow holds "possibilities" of PEACE & HOPE.

Never give up on MOVING FORWARD.

You got this!!!

Luv,

Nicole ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌ (Grief Forum)

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌     SIGNS from love ones we lost!!!

A source of COMFORT on those days/nights when we NEED IT.

(1) Timing: SIGNS often appear when they are most needed, such as on anniversaries, birthdays, or in moments of distress, according to a blogger at O'Connor Mortuary.

(2) Intuition: They are described as giving a sense of peace, love, or comfort, rather than fear.

(3) Directness: They often feel too specific to be coincidences, appearing personal to the relationship you shared.

*** When we get "quiet" (relax, meditate) & "believe" - they will contact us! ‌‌👍‌‌

[js16354698]

I lost my husband,soulmate, friend of 50 years 4 months ago. I need support. I go to hospice one on one once a month and group twice a month. I feel like I need more support. 

[JaneCares]

Hello there, dear js16... Fifty years is more than half a lifetime. Most likely you were his wife and now his widow. (There's a small chance that you are also a man and his husband.) Regardless of anything, you are bereft. Four months is not a lot of time. It's just the other day!

Have you finished most of the huge list of 'to do's' that one has to take care of as executor, survivor, of a death? At four months, most folks have drifted off into their own lives again, and you are on your own with your grief. Did you share children? Can you talk to them about your husband, at least a little bit?

Don't let anyone say to you, 'move on!' okay? After a 50 year relationship? You are forever changed by being with your husband, and by losing him. And right now you have little idea of how the next chapter of your life will take shape. My wife reminded me of an Alanon saying: "When a door closes, a window somewhere opens, but it can be hell in the hallway."

Sure can.

Nicole benefitted from psychotherapy. Maybe you would, too. It can be a bit of a trick to find a counselor who takes Medicare, but i managed to with some effort. I called people i saw on Medicare.gov until i found a person with an opening. It's not that weekly counseling will make you feel immediately better. I wish it did, but change and healing go slower than that. What I hope you would find is a supportive, smart person who can help you remember him, appreciate the qualities you loved, and also lift up the qualities he loved in YOU: those same good strong qualities that will help you blossom, over time, into the next chapter of you, the next version of you.

What are your friends like? What other family members loved him, too?

Thank you for writing, js16. Write some more if you want to. We are here and we've been through this agony, as well.

hugs around (virtually)

Jane

[SummerOnTheWay1]

[Friday 8/7/26]

Dear @js16354698 , I am so sorry for your loss dear friend!!!

I am heading to send a COPY of your post to our wonderful & caring AARP Experts Amy @agoyer & Jane @JaneCares .

Individual Counseling helped me.

Volunteering helped other members.

Amy & Jane will stop by when they can with some "suggestions" for you.

So glad you stopped by to see us.

Luv,

Nicole 🤗🤗🤗 (Grief Forum)

---

➡️[*** JS @js16354698 wrote:

I lost my husband,soulmate, friend of 50 years 4 months ago. I need support. I go to hospice one on one once a month and group twice a month. I feel like I need more support. 

---

@MichelleC103656 @mc6844 @SummerOnTheWay1 

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌❌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌️     Myth:

The pain will go away faster if you IGNORE it.

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌✅‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌️     Fact:

Trying to IGNORE your pain or keep it from surfacing will only make it worse in the long run. For REAL HEALING, it is necessary to face your grief and actively deal with it.