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Honored Social Butterfly

WE ARE SORRY about your loss ๐Ÿ’›

THIS GROUP IS OPEN TO ALL GRIEVERS NO MATTER HOW LONG IT HAS BEEN [years,days].

 

To participate, click on reply button at bottom of this post. Enter your comment. Click on reply again.

 

Grief & Loss Team  ๐Ÿค—

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Honored Social Butterfly

1 step at a time!!!

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Newbie

The anniversary of my husband's death is next Tuesday. I am dreading that day.

 

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Silver Conversationalist

Laurel I'm so sorry for your loss and anxiety over your husband's ๐ŸŽˆ birthday. We all have different beliefs. I think our passed on loved ones are closer to us than we realize. I wish you comfort and peace ๐Ÿ’•

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Honored Social Butterfly

1 step at a time!!!

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AARP Expert

@SummerOnTheWay1 happy to help out anyway I can! 

be sure to check out the section on AARPโ€™s website with grief and loss support. Thereโ€™s lots of good articles and information there!

 

www.AARP.org/griefandloss 

 

tc

Amy Goyer, AARP Family and Caregiving Expert

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Honored Social Butterfly

1 step at a time!!!

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Silver Conversationalist

It's nice to see you Nicole. Still here with your wonderful work on the forum. It's helpful for tips on how to be of help to others going through these difficult matters. Grief is a transition that none of us wants or welcomes. This forum is a ready source of help and hope. Not everyone has insurance or can make appointments. Online is so convenient. I hope you are well and everyone on the forum, old and new, well as can be going through all of this. Take care!

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Trusted Contributor

Hey Nicole! Thanks for sending love to my furbabies last night. Our girl cats really need it. Bristol, the Lynx Point, and Nova, the gray and white Manx haven't been feeling so well the last couple of days. The vet said that they are having bad allergic reactions to their new flea medicine. We have had fleas and ticks so bad in New York this Summer. We have had to give them lots of baths and bomb the house. Our boy cat, Stewie, hasn't been bothered as much. The girls have been infested and have been losing their fur in spots. The new medicine irritated them and made them sick.The vet suggested we try something more natural and less harsh. We have used coconut oil with some success. We have just been so worried and upset. We hate seeing them suffer. It makes you feel so helpless. Well, I have to go. Thank you for your encouraging and reassuring words. ๐Ÿ™‚๐Ÿ’Œ๐Ÿฑ๐Ÿฑ๐Ÿฑ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€๐Ÿซ

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Honored Social Butterfly

1 step at a time!!!

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Trusted Contributor

Nicole, you are so wonderful and nice!  You always have something positive to say. It is so very true what you are saying about grief. My sister and I still miss our Dad so much every day. We miss seeing him and talking to him. We really miss his wonderful advice. He was so much to so many. People who used to work with him or were his friends still tell me what a great guy he was. It makes me so happy. I think about him more when it the week of my birthday. The year he died, 2015, my birthday was on Monday. He died on Friday, October 2nd, which was my great grandmother's birthday. Every year, my birthday reminds me of the anniversary of his death. I have to go now. I can't see,because I can't stop crying. Thank you for your kind words and fantastic attitude. You are a real treasure. ๐Ÿ™‚๐Ÿ’Œ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€๐Ÿซ

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Honored Social Butterfly

1 step at a time!!!

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Silver Conversationalist

Nicole, so nice to see you here. I haven't dropped by in some time. Except grief is always with us  Trying to enjoy what we can is a great reminder. There are so many challenges it's easy to forget wonderful places such as this. Where people just, know. I hope all on the forum are well as can be. Take care!

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Honored Social Butterfly

1 step at a time!!!

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Silver Conversationalist

I encourage those on the forum to just keep going. Sometimes we have a tough day or sleepless night. Maybe troubled souls cross our path. Or just trying to keep ourselves and lives together during these times. We slowly learn not to present ourselves in a vulnerable manner. And still be loving individuals. Time takes time. We are living in answered prayer.

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Honored Social Butterfly

๐Ÿ“Ž  [8/8/25] Well said MC @mc6844 !!! I started counseling last month and glad I did. Found out it is very "healthy" to avoid TOXIC folks. They DRAIN you and keep on going.

 

Luv,

Nicole. โ€Œ๐Ÿค—โ€Œโ€Œ๐Ÿค—โ€Œโ€Œ๐Ÿค—โ€Œ  (Grief Forum)

 

โ€Œโžก๏ธโ€Œ[*** MC 

@mc6844 wrote:
I encourage those on the forum to just keep going. Sometimes we have a tough day or sleepless night. Maybe troubled souls cross our path. Or just trying to keep ourselves and lives together during these times. We slowly learn not to present ourselves in a vulnerable manner. And still be loving individuals. Time takes time. We are living in answered prayer.

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Newbie

I lost my husband of 49 years in February.  Itโ€™s been 6 months now & it just isnโ€™t getting better. I cry every night. I stay so busy during the day just so I donโ€™t think about it. 

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Honored Social Butterfly

[Thursday 7/30/26]

 

Dear @dw53874168 , I am "thinking" about YOU!!!

 

How are you doing TODAY/TONIGHT?

 

Luv,

Nicole ๐Ÿค—๐Ÿค—๐Ÿค— (Grief Forum)

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Honored Social Butterfly

[6/30/26] Dear @dw53874168 , we hope you will stop by AGAIN to see us!!!

 

Grief & Loss Team โ€Œ๐Ÿค—โ€Œ 

Trusted Contributor

I am not convinced "tis better to have loved and lost . . . " but I do envy you and others their long relationships. I have never married, lost my career, was diagnosed with debilitating illnesses, lost my financial security, lost my lifestyle, lost access to passionate pursuits, lost productive occupation, lost my friends, and lost close family connections. I think it would have been rewarding to have a long-term romantic relationship but it would also be one more loss on my "pile." Getting out from under all that has been almost impossible and I actually just try not to lose more. Unfortunately, now I cling to "things" which cost little to maintain and accept me as I am -- at any given moment! After over 20 years of these changes, I still yearn for the life that I felt I was just building and then the rejection and disregard of people I have cared about. Since I turned 65 this month, I would like to accept and finally let go of how I wanted my life to be. What I have is pathetic to me and has been unacceptable but none of my attempts to improve circumstances has worked. I feel that I have no choice but to shut down and give up every little strand left of my past. But since no substitutions have worked either, I feel like a black hole just closing down, collapsing into myself. If not for my dog . . . . 

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Honored Social Butterfly

[Thursday 7/30/26]

 

Dear @l124289r , I am "thinking" about YOU!!!

 

How are you doing TODAY/TONIGHT?

 

Luv,

Nicole ๐Ÿค—๐Ÿค—๐Ÿค— (Grief Forum)

Trusted Contributor

Most days, "so, so." Thank you; it's nice to be sincerely asked.

Honored Social Butterfly

Thursday 7/30/26]

 

Dear @l124289r , you are welcome my friend.

 

SO GOOD to hear from you!!! ๐Ÿ‘

 

Yes, I too have been "challenged" on some days & nights with a few PEACEFUL ONES mixed in.

 

Keep stepping. It will get BETTER as you "figure" out ways to obtain PEACE in the "midst" of our life's journey.

 

Luv,

Nicole ๐Ÿค—๐Ÿค—๐Ÿค— (Grief Forum)

 


โžก๏ธ[*** L @l124289r wrote:

Most days, "so, so." Thank you; it's nice to be sincerely asked.


 

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Honored Social Butterfly

[6/30/26] Dear @l124289r , we hope you will stop by AGAIN to see us!!!

 

Grief & Loss Team โ€Œ๐Ÿค—โ€Œ 

Silver Conversationalist

I'm so sorry for your losses. I'm sure your life has touched others in helpful ways you haven't thought of. You are doing well sharing your thoughts and emotions here. Please keep stopping by the forum. Your sharing helps others find the way forward in their grief too! Take care

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Esteemed Social Butterfly

Hi, your post touched me.  I donโ€™t know if I have any words that would comfort you, but I do want to tell you that I read your post and Iโ€™m sorry for the things that are so overwhelming for you.

 

What kind of dog do you have?

 Iโ€™m a cat person, myself.  Although our cat is not a dog, we try and teach it tricks!  It knows many words, but the best is when we say โ€œsquirrelโ€, heโ€™ll come dashing in the room eager to see it from the window!   

Pets can be a great comfort.  I think many times more than people, if that makes any sense.  I hope your precious dog brings you comfort and love as well.  They can sense we need something too!

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Silver Conversationalist

I'm so sorry for the loss of your husband. 49 yrs is a long time. I'm so glad you're stopping in at this forum. There are good people here who have gone through and experiencing what you're going through. Each time you're here you can leave a bit of grief and hopefully feel a little lighter. For those of us who were married young and/or in long relationships we learn new ways of doing things.  A counselor is a good idea. If you're not up to in person then there are online options. It's great that you're teaching out on this forum. The focus is on grief.  This helps us not to ignore our grief. Please take care!

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Honored Social Butterfly

๐Ÿ“Ž [8/27/25]@dw53874168 , I am so sorry for your loss dear friend!!!

 

IF you have any "questions" we do have two totally AWESOME AARP Experts who stop by to SUPPORT us. Jane @JaneCares & Amy @agoyer have also lost people they cared about.

 

WE are here whenever you NEED us ALWAYS.

 

Luv,

Nicole  ๐Ÿค—๐Ÿค—๐Ÿค—  (Grief Forum)

 

โžก๏ธ[*** 


@dw53874168 wrote:

I lost my husband of 49 years in February.  Itโ€™s been 6 months now & it just isnโ€™t getting better. I cry every night. I stay so busy during the day just so I donโ€™t think about it. 


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Contributor

Iโ€™m so sorry for your loss. My husband and I were married for 52 years when I lost him on Thanksgiving almost 6 years ago. The pain is still there, but itโ€™s manageable, and changes. We just keep doing one day at a time. Some are really hard still, but some are ok too. Iโ€™m lucky to have good friends, and family nearby. I hope you have someone who is a willing ear. Two of my closest friends are also widows, and I find it easier to be open with them, because they understand. 

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Honored Social Butterfly

[Thursday 7/30/26]

 

Dear Cecilia @CeciliaH401383 , I am "thinking" about YOU!!!

 

How are you doing TODAY/TONIGHT?

 

Luv,

Nicole ๐Ÿค—๐Ÿค—๐Ÿค— (Grief Forum)

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Honored Social Butterfly

[6/30/26] Dear Cecilia @CeciliaH401383 , we hope you will stop by AGAIN to see us!!!

 

Grief & Loss Team โ€Œ๐Ÿค—โ€Œ 

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