Re: Love, Remembrance and Hope for Memorial Day We...

SueS788527 · ‎05-27-2023

I wanted to reach out to all of you as our country celebrates Memorial Day weekend. Some of us have family members who died serving our country, others view this day as a day of celebration and remembrance. You may feel more alone, just like other holidays and weekends. It is unfortunately part of the grievance journey. But it is a journey, meaning that we can decide how to spend today and future days. Self-pity is also natural but ultimately negative since it prevents us from seeing future opportunities and with it hope. Like my widow friend told me 14 months ago after my husband died, do something today and this weekend that makes you feel at peace and perhaps some “joy.” Whether we like it or not, we are in transition to another type of life and future relationships and identity. Be at peace with yourself and know you have the resilience to come out of this “dark valley of despair.” Yes, we have lost our loved one, but there are others out there who can be our new friends and kindred spirits. Be open to that by starting to reach out to these individuals. Avoid bitter and judgmental people around you. Feel sorry for them since they have chosen to stay in their own valley of despair, and it appears want company. That is not a club we want to join. I am feeling more hopeful while still respecting and remembering the love of my life. I spent 50 years with him, and I know he would want me to be “happy.” Not sure what that looks like but am working on it. I am starting with peace of mind and no regrets, putting past bad memories in perspective. Celebrate the life you lived and know it is not over. There is promise and hope awaiting you and all of us. Your friend, Sue ☘️