Loss of husband

[ElaineM928269]

After being married 49 years and 9 months, my husband passed away.  He went in for pre-op testing because he was having a second knee replacement done.  They found two blocked arteries - one was 95% and the other 80% plus he had an aneurysm by his heart.  He needed open heart surgery.  The doctor was very confident and didn't foresee any complications.  Unfortunately, people are not always right.  My husband was bleeding and he wouldn't clot.  I still don't really know what that means except that he is no longer with me.

I feel so alone even though I have a daughter.  She has her own family to worry about.  I have a brother in law and sister in law who try helping me whenever they can.  My friends are there to listen, but have their own lives.

I just cry and cry.  I know he wouldn't want me to be doing this, but I'm just so sad.  I miss him.

[JaneCares]

Unexpected loss is so hard. He was probably thinking, I'll be glad when all of this is over and I can hang out with Elaine in our cozy home!  And then he went to sleep in the OR and never woke up. You were unprepared. What a SHOCK. You are not going on and on. You are sharing your experience, and there is no deadline, no time frame, no limit. Grief takes its time and so you survive every day, and that is an accomplishment. 

You are there in your home. Any fixing up, or transformations you and he wanted to accomplish? Gardening goals? it's time to put the garden to bed, or getting there  depending where you live. 

Your big dream was to live the cozy life, and you did for a while. And now there are other dreams.

We're here for all the going on you want to do.

Jane

[JohnD284400]

I’m so sorry for the loss.. I don’t know why but you remind me of my wife. I also lost her Aug 24 2024 the worst date of my life… I’m pulling up together now 

I hope you get better soon.