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Re: Living life as a widow/ widower

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Thank you for your kindness. Yes I am still reeling and even questioning. But, I am glad we talked about these moment before the situation arrived.  

Yes i miss her so much,but I will live on do the work that I promised her I would compete.  Thanks again for your words.

My daughter and I are even closer now. She is GREAT!!

 

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Re: Living life as a widow/ widower

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Thank you for your kindness. Yes I am still reeling and even questioning. But, I am glad we talked about these moment before the situation arrived.  

Yes i miss her so much,but I will live on do the work that I promised her I would compete.  Thanks again for your words.

My daughter and I are even closer now. She is GREAT!!

 

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Re: Living life as a widow/ widower

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Have a wonderfully blessed day, God Blessed you. 

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Re: Living life as a widow/ widower

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We have been married for 49 years and cannot imagine the loneliness and pain felt at the loss of a loved one.  As with many couples, we have had good times as well as bad but we managed to get through them and move forward.  As I look at pictures we’ve taken over the years it’s hard to believe how much we’ve changed through aging. Medical issues that we never imagined would affect us have slowed us down and we find ourselves occupied with doctors’ appointments, physical therapy sessions, and various medications.  Despite these inconveniences we are glad to be alive and believe there is more to life than these interruptions. To wake up each day, see the sun and the marvels of creation, makes one wonder if we are on the earth to live just a few years and eventually die. It seems when we reach an age when we can enjoy the fruits of our labor, life ends.  When we analyze the way we were created isn’t it possible that we were created to live indefinitely?  When I’ve examined that question, I found that man and woman were created with eternal life in view.  As amazing as that sounds my skepticism led me to research that question.  First, I knew that  no self-help book written by a human would provide a satisfying answer. Second, as I dug, my investigation took me to an unassailable author – Almighty God. As simplistic as that sounds, who can offer a more satisfying answer to our questions? I found great comfort in knowing that if we lose our mate, the Bible offers comfort through the hope of a resurrection.  It provides proof by supplying actual accounts of nine [9] past resurrections.  I encourage you to read these accounts because you will feel the sheer happiness relatives of those individuals felt when reunited with their loved ones. What straightforward comfort these passages give. Most of all, this author cannot lie.  Of course, these accounts might seem unbelievable to many, but it takes faith reinforced by a careful examination of the Bible to appreciate the reliability of this promise. If we lose a loved one we have the hope of seeing them again through this marvelous provision. The Bible does not give a date when this will occur, but it does reveal that circumstances on the earth would deteriorate to an abominable state in a short timeframe. As we see these prophecies fulfilled, now is not the time to lose hope.  Find out what wonderful opportunity the Bible offers to obedient mankind.

If you would like more information, please consult the website jw.org and feel free to write me.

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Re: Living life as a widow/ widower

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My kids are older and I have  grandkids.But the pain is there. Be strong for you Daughter .Good Luck to you. Sorry  for your lost.

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Re: Living life as a widow/ widower

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Thank you for your advice. Yes it is tough and yes I do feel heavy. The gym allows me some escape. The tears and lonely feelings are starting to subside. ( They still hover with alarming surprise.) The Woman I lost was so great. 

We talked about what I would be doing about this time in my life. my promise was to look after our daughter and myself. 

Sleeping is tough but managable. 

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Re: Living life as a widow/ widower

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Message 7 of 40

Your very welcome.

 

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Re: Living life as a widow/ widower

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Message 8 of 40

Much of the loss and pain is felt even if you aren't married and it is awful when they won't let you in the ambulance.  You know it is bad when a man introduces himself as the chaplain when you just arrived at the emergency room family/friends waiting line.  I went back to the house without him..no one to call as it was so late..just stayed up all night, cleaning the house and crying.  I had known Chuck for almost 14 years, lived with him 8 years and built a successful business with him.  I was the one that introduced him to the opportunity/light bulb moment for the business.  After his death, his sister then stole all the hotel commission checks even though she verbally to-my-face said she'd reimburse me for them.  She did help to get the business ownership changed to me, but it took a long time to get the hotels to change the address for the commission checks.  Chuck died Jan. 4, 2014 and my first commission check arrived Mar. 27.  I also experienced sensing he was with me and rolling over in bed and realizing he wasn't..and it was so real.  I tried going to a therapist for a month & all she did was take my money.  No, I don't want another relationship..just want to say that much of what I read on the AARP website article coincided with what I felt even though we weren't married..but you see, we worked day in and day out together.

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Re: Living life as a widow/ widower

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Message 9 of 40

I wish I could get back in another relationship after living 23 years without my beloved husband but I believed I've hardened off.  I had a neighbor who tried for those 23 years without me even having coffee with him - I just wasn't interested.  The first time I saw my husband, I was l0 years old and he called me a brat because I was crying about my dog.  Had known his oldest brother and cousin since I was 5 because they worked at the same place as my father.  I had always wanted to work since I was 12 and I started putting up my age by 21/2 years at 14.  Anyway, my uncle's girlfriend asked if I wanted to go with her to apply for a job and I did.  Didn't know you had to be 18 and I was 15, so I figured if I told them I was turning 18 in a couple of months I would get hired and I did.  I met my husband for the 2nd time when he asked if I needed a ride home and it took him 3 days to catch up with because I thought he was married even though he gave me his phone number.  We had no idea that were were the same 2 people because he thought my father had an older daughter.  He tried for 3 months to romance me but I did not want a one-night stand and I wasn't looking for a husband, so I let him into my heart.  We had the most beautiful life together for 27 years before he passed.  He even offered me a divorce when he found out saying that I was a young woman (44)  and I needed a man to take care of me and I told him no because I was in it for the long haul and I believed in my marriage vowel and he was so floored that I could see it in his face. 

We had 2 children together and I was glad they were grown when he passed because I don't think I could have handled it otherwise.  From the 2 kids, we got 6 grandsons and now 2 great granddaughters and 1 great grandson.  We ended up losing our 2nd born grandson 3 years ago a week before Christmas.  My daughter and I haven't spoken to each other for 3 years because she had this friend that turned up a few months after my husband died and before she met her husband and my intution then told me he was sneaky and I thought I would never see him again but when he and wife wasn't getting along, he shows up 23 years later and my intuition was right the first time because now they were making plans to betogether and trying to involve me but my morals don't work like that.  I couldn't believe that because my son-in-law had this beaugitful relationship of respect for each other that my child would plot with her friend (because my son-in-law treated me the same way my husband treated my mother) would come up with a scheme to make me think I was moving with them to another state simply because my son-in-law would always come get me when they house hunting and tell me what room was going to be mine.   Their scheming was actually a blessing in disguise because I moved into a beautiful facitlity.  My daughter also dislike the fact that my oldest grandson loves his grandmother and that I don't get..

At one point I was thinking did she think her father was her man and she hated me because she

says he spoiled me.

At this point in my life I wouldn't want to be cruel to a man and it's not that I feel I'm cheating on my husband, but this man would be living in my husband's shodow which my son pointed out to me.  Being along isn't bad at all for me because I've alway been a homebody and I've already told some of the family that when I can no longer take care of myself, I will leave this world my way.  I am writing a book so I sincerely hope this wasn't a lot of rattling or too much information - just sharing. 

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Re: Living life as a widow/ widower

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Message 10 of 40

Its there you  will find the way that it s right for  you

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