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I miss my husband
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I miss my husband
It has been a little over a year since Tom died. His favorite place in the whole world was Alaska. I just got back from a cruise to Alaska, one that we had planned, and took some of his ashes for a burial at sea. On the 19th of September one year to date I put his ashes in the Bay of Alaska. It was almost not accomplished because of 27 foot waves. But at 2:00pm the seas calmed and the sun came out so at 4:00pm the exact time of his death one year earlier i put his ashes in the water followed by everyone throwing rose petals into the air. It was beautiful. One hour later the rough weather returned and the sun went away. Now I am back to my real life and still wondering what I am going to do. Sell the house? Move to another state? Lots of questions but no answers.
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Dear Janice @Janiceww6254 , I luv what you shared.
Wow, Alaska!!!!
They say we should take OUR TIME with MAJOR decisions and WE will KNOW when the time is right.
So GOOD hearing from you,
Nicole ๐ค๐ค๐ค
[*** JANICE wrote: It has been a little over a year since Tom died. His favorite place in the whole world was Alaska. I just got back from a cruise to Alaska, one that we had planned, and took some of his ashes for a burial at sea. On the 19th of September one year to date I put his ashes in the Bay of Alaska. It was almost not accomplished because of 27 foot waves. But at 2:00pm the seas calmed and the sun came out so at 4:00pm the exact time of his death one year earlier i put his ashes in the water followed by everyone throwing rose petals into the air. It was beautiful. One hour later the rough weather returned and the sun went away. Now I am back to my real life and still wondering what I am going to do. Sell the house? Move to another state? Lots of questions but no answers. ***]
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Janice, I am sorry for your loss. Truly amazing how the seas calmed and the sun came out at the time of your husband's death. HE was there with you Janice. I, too, am going through the same questioning. My remaining family is in another state. I went to visit them last Christmas and spent three weeks there. They want me to move there to be near them. My one remaining son and I are planning on selling our homes and relocating. My main reason for doing so is that the state I live in no longer punishes the criminals and what once was a beautiful, safe area has become dangerous. I want to spend the remaining years of my life in an area where I can come out of my home, buy groceries, go to the bank & shop without being accosted by someone. I want to live in a home where they are not breaking into your car, into your backyard stealing anything not nailed down and trying your front door at all hours of the night and day. Do I WANT to move, NO. Do I HAVE to move, YES. They say NOT to make any big decisions for the first year after a death of a loved one. YOU and you alone will make the decision that is best for you. Wishing you peace and love.
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Before you take such a serious step..i would ask myself why sell the house ..what state would I want to move to and start a new life...why ..After finding out what your preferences are I would go to the state I'm interested in rent for atleast 3-6 mos to see if it's what you want ..If you burn all your bridges you may regret it down the line...There are many options in life..If money is the issue then perhaps selling the house as is might be a solution..If you want a new life then go for what ever will help establish it...Wishing ou well with all of the decisons..pray on it for a solution...
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I'm sorry Janice, I meant to address your topic, that you miss your husband. Missing the physical presence of a person, or even a place is certainly a grieving process. When we feel up to it we can try to look at things in a new light. Because life is fluid and ever changing. We can let that light in a little at a time. I believe the spirits of our loved ones are frequently around us. When we can't see we have our faith. The section on this forum about signs from loved ones is informative and uplifting!
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I'm so sorry for your loss Janice. The good people on this site can help you cope with your loss on a daily basis. Give yourself a breather. Time takes time. As the days pass with daily tasks, things fall into place and we get accustomed to knowing what to do. Take care Janice!
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Every one has been so kind and caring. I am doing better but some days are really difficult. No major decisions have been made just a few minor repairs to the house. My dog is a blessing. It gets up and out.
Good to talk to everyone again,
Janice
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Janice, it's good to hear an update from you. And good you're doing better. Grief is a sort of back and forth dance, if you will. I find it hits at unexpected times. Could be a photograph appearing, someone saying something to you that brings it on. Those are times to take a pause and keep the day simple. Day at a time, an hour or moment at a time. Please take care of yourself Janice! Things will get better.
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