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Honored Social Butterfly

👍 Encouragement!!!

🔽*** See posts BELOW ***🔽

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Silver Conversationalist

Coolslick, what I'm realizing more and more is that our loved ones are always with us. I didn't realize it until I began to slow down some. Things will get better. Take care!

Honored Social Butterfly

Hi Angel @coolslick , we are alot ALIKE - your PM to me was like my TWIN was talking.

 

Try to be YOUR BEST self, cry when needed and on those days you MISS your loved ones - miss them. With time as WE ALLOW ourselves to BE US, our days and nights will GET BETTER I PROMISE.

 

This AARP Grief & Loss Forum is my DAILY place to come to. Yes, not everyone has been on my Like List, but with time they have made their exit ALLOWING me to ENJOY the folks who CARE.

 

I am here EVERY DAY Angel.

 

Luv you SO MUCH,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

 


[*** ANGEL @coolslick wrote:

Thank you..I am in a very bad frame of mind right now..I need to eat , I am a diabetic , and go out..and I cannot pull myself together...I saw something that went into my heart concerning my ex husband and children's father whom I loved and he loved me back for 55 years..we lost a daugher and the day he passed I lost my last part of her...everytime I see something that reminds me of our 4 year dating years it tears my heart to pieces...it's been almost a year and I cannot get through it...I did remarry but we never lost contact...after my second husband [assed 13 years ago , we rebuilt our relationship, friendship, never moved back in together but the bond and closeness was there...I took care of him the best he would allow me at the end of his life...he was a very I'll Nam vet... ***]


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Regular Contributor

Good morning Nicole,

Thank you..so much for answering me..I am still having a horrible time navigating this site..I have asked for help, haven't gotten it yet..Unless someone writes to me I can't find this page or the page about pen pals..

Since I suffer from multiple traumatic losses I have been in counseling and grief groups off and on for years...this is different...It's not quite a year, but almost...I am trying so hard to get through the hard days. I feel like as I'm missing him and crying that my heart is being torn to shreds...I sob ..at times have an appt and can't get out the door..I think if I can accept it and accept that I have suffered enough losses that maybe I've had it...very little strength left..older , a few health quirks...exhaustion don't help..I need to accept it and let myself feel it and remember it is normal...and will get better..but I lose it...You are my only friend right now and I appreciate you , and am grateful for you...

Luv you back...sending you peace in your heart....🤗

God is never late!
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Honored Social Butterfly

Good Morning Angel @coolslick . The Penpal Thing has zero to do with me so have no idea how safe it is. I was only trying to help @OldMarriedMan get it up and running. I have since deleted my posts as nothing from him. Please BE CAREFUL ON THIS SITE. Lol, have had various Drama Kings and Queens target me but the AARP Moderators are AWESOME with intervening as needed. You, the Grief & Loss Team (some of them), my daughter and folks I meet at Walmart have ADDED to my life. I am a hermit like you and I ONLY venture out AS NEEDED. Been through TOO MUCH with humans, I NOW TAKE MY TIME with them. As far as doing the daily things - I have my moments of doing them and NOT. I accept the emotions I have NOW and TRUST with TIME I will figure out MORE stuff. My only child was laid off 4/11/24 and just got back from my Mechanic. Lol, TWO things that are a CHALLENGE RIGHT NOW. So this OLD lady is heading for her Old Lady Nap. Time to re-balance and then DECIDE THE REST OF MY DAY.

 

Luv you SO MUCH,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

 


[*** ANGEL @coolslick wrote:

Good morning Nicole,

Thank you..so much for answering me..I am still having a horrible time navigating this site..I have asked for help, haven't gotten it yet..Unless someone writes to me I can't find this page or the page about pen pals..

Since I suffer from multiple traumatic losses I have been in counseling and grief groups off and on for years...this is different...It's not quite a year, but almost...I am trying so hard to get through the hard days. I feel like as I'm missing him and crying that my heart is being torn to shreds...I sob ..at times have an appt and can't get out the door..I think if I can accept it and accept that I have suffered enough losses that maybe I've had it...very little strength left..older , a few health quirks...exhaustion don't help..I need to accept it and let myself feel it and remember it is normal...and will get better..but I lose it...You are my only friend right now and I appreciate you , and am grateful for you...

Luv you back...sending you peace in your heart....🤗  ***]


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Regular Contributor

🤗You're not kidding it's like talking to your twin...God bless..I feel like sisters..Got it about the pen pal thing , there is no movement on it..having been on a pen pal site before , I was talking to a woman who I thought was a man..nice conversations..never out of line but a scammer all the same...Oh Lord! I don't need drama kings and queens...no one has contacted me and I am just fine with it being you and I..I am exactly the same..I had 3 daughters...lost my middle one 27 years ago at 21..so I have 2 daughters I talk to and would like to not bring my grief to them..they hurt too..I have wonderful conversations with everyone in Walmart. And Now thank God I have you...I am looking into a grief group that has 2 meetings a week, I talked to the Social worker this morning for about an hour...she said I have what's called Stacked Grief..Oh Boy!! do I get that "Old Lady Nap" and love every minute of it...will catch up tomorrow...enjoy the rest of your day...✌️xo

God is never late!
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Honored Social Butterfly

Hi @OldMarriedMan , you have been SUCCESSFUL with starting your own Chat  Thread in the AARP Introduce Yourself Forum.

 

▶️*** VIRTUAL PENPALS (this is your spot to chat, 3 people have been kind and responded to you here).

 

▶️*** LINK TO YOUR CHAT IS BELOW:

 

https://community.aarp.org/t5/Introduce-Yourself/Virtual-Pen-Pals/m-p/2556463#M11543

 

[1] Lee @LeeS4949  and @wilful  had RESPONDED to you. A new member also responded to you.

 

[2] Suggestion and NO PRESSURE to listen to me:

 

Why not POST a THANK YOU to them for responding to your post. Lee ALWAYS welcomes NEW folks, a very nice guy and open to PMs from folks on site. Wilful has told you he/she is INTERESTED and shared his/her info with you. Jumping all over the site and posting the same request, in my opinion is not the way to go. The NEW person is open to supporting you.

 

*** When OTHER people SEE you thanking these 3 people and chatting with them = MORE PEOPLE will stop by to CHAT with you!!! ***

 

Good luck,

Nicole  👵

 


[*** @OldMarriedMan wrote:

Hello Nicole,

 

Thanks for your post. We can all use some words of encouragement from time to time. 🙂

 

Is this a chat somewhere else?

 

DAILY CHATS AND DISCUSSIONS ABOUT LIFE

 

I want to start a virtual pen pals group and I'm looking for a forum to call home... ***]

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Regular Contributor

Hello Nicole, thanks for your advice. I had responded to @wilful via PM and had not heard back yet. I have some questions about the site. Like how did you get the tag line "Esteemed Social Butterfly"? I like it. 

 

Warm regards,

 

Milt

Life is good!
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Regular Contributor

Hello Nicole,

 

Thanks for your post. We can all use some words of encouragement from time to time. 🙂

 

Is this a chat somewhere else?

 

DAILY CHATS AND DISCUSSIONS ABOUT LIFE

 

I want to start a virtual pen pals group and I'm looking for a forum to call home...

Life is good!
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Honored Social Butterfly

Hi @OldMarriedMan , if you look underneath your USERNAME for this site you will see YOUR TITLE of Regular Contributor. New People are Newbie. As you guys POST on this site, these titles will keep CHANGING. Personally, I could NOT careless but I guess it ENCOURAGES folks to post = promotions I guess.  🙄

 

Nicole  👵

 


[*** MILT @OldMarriedMan wrote:

Hello Nicole, thanks for your advice. I had responded to @wilful via PM and had not heard back yet. I have some questions about the site. Like how did you get the tag line "Esteemed Social Butterfly"? I like it. 

 

Warm regards,

 

Milt ***]

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Honored Social Butterfly

@VenaE974710  , I hope you will stop by AGAIN! Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

 


[*** VENA @VenaE974710 wrote:

I lost my wonderful husband last October. We were only married 6 years! We knew each for 15 years, but being married really made a difference in the way in how we cared for each other. We were long distance the first two years so really we just had 4 years together. Add a brain tumor diagnosis and we just had 2 "normal " years together.

It  is hard living alone; mostly not being able to share daily life with him anymore. We made our dreams come true and then whammo, they came  tumbling down. It breaks my heart to have lost him and for him to deteriorate over the 18 months.:{  ***]

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Silver Conversationalist

Vena, I'm sorry for your loss of your husband. They say your loved ones are with you always. There's a topic on the forum about signs from your loved ones. There's so much we don't know about life beyond. But it's not your time to go there yet. Or else you'd be there. Look for signs of familiarity and hope. While staying grounded in daily activities. The people on this forum are lovely and kind. They will help you through their own experiences. Take care!

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Honored Social Butterfly

👣 1 Step At A Time!!!

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Honored Social Butterfly

@tttttt , I hope you will stop by AGAIN! Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

 


[*** @tttttt wrote:

Good evening 

My husband Ron passed away 9/13/2023 and I need to get into a group that will help me through this. Or I may have a nervous break down. ***]

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Silver Conversationalist

I'm so sorry for your loss of your dear husband Ron. Please stop in at the forum when you can. It will give you insights and ideas. And help to lighten your grief.

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Honored Social Butterfly

@CarolD435501 , I hope you will stop by AGAIN! Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

 


[*** CAROL @CarolD435501 wrote:

It is so hard,,,,,lost my husband of 32 years April 15th 2023....some days I seem to go forward,,,and then I fall back more days then I gained.....How long do I have to feel this,,,,no one knows,,,,but talking the others may help.../. ***]

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Silver Conversationalist

Carol, so glad you stopped by. This forum and the good people here can offer encouragement and hope. Each time you stop by it helps to lighten your grief. Take it easy, and take care! I know it's not easy.

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Honored Social Butterfly

@AlisaH435648 , I hope you will stop by AGAIN! Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

 


[*** ALISA @AlisaH435648 wrote:

My sweet husband died after a difficult surgery November 6th. I don't know how to live in this big house alone, it's so quiet. The upkeep is alot. Every room has a memory and story and shared items. I feel so heavy, my arms and legs. So **bleep** sad. I worry about money, still waiting for an attorney to do thier part (filing with courts) so I can fulfil my duty set forth in his living will. I'm just damned frightened and so so sad. I suppose this isn't one challenge. It's a challenge to just be me right now...   ***]

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Silver Conversationalist

Alisa, I'm so sorry for your loss. It is frightening at times to be on your own. I saved errands for those times that I found difficult. All of it is challenging. But things settle in time. I've found counseling helpful during difficult times in life. Please take care!

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Honored Social Butterfly

👣  1 Step At A Time!!!

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Honored Social Butterfly

@JuliaB831263  , I hope you will stop by AGAIN! Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

 


[*** JULIA @JuliaB831263 wrote:

Thank you for those virtual hugs I needed today after I lost my 18 year old Alexis from a cancerous brain tumor known as "Glioblastoma" ***]

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Silver Conversationalist

I'm so sorry for your loss, Julia. The good people on the forum can help you cope. While going through grieving there is still the need to try and keep up with everyday life. Some days are just a standstill. Two steps forward, one step back. You are doing well, reaching out. Short walks, sunshine helps. Just do what you can. Take care.

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Honored Social Butterfly

Cadee @Cadee2719 , YOU are in my thoughts TODAY! Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

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Hi Nicole.  Still unpacking 🤪  Met a neighbor, so friendly.  She invited me to the 4th of July block party.  This was the right decision for me.  How is your daughter doing?  How are YOU doing?  I don't have my computer hooked up yet so I apologize as I am using my phone and it is harder to use.


@SummerIsTooHOT wrote:

(4/24/24) Cadee @Cadee2719 , YOU are in my thoughts TODAY! Nicole  🤗🤗🤗




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Honored Social Butterfly

“Never. WE never lose our loved ones. They accompany us; they don’t disappear from our lives. WE are merely in different rooms.”

 

~~Paulo Coehlo

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Nicole,  I am trying to have faith but, I am having a really hard time. My disability has been denied for a second time. I contacted another lawyer because,  mine point blank s**ks. The only contact is initiated by me and I am tired of it. It's been 3 years and nothing. I told my BFF that I am either ready for the looney bin or death, whichever comes first. I am just struggling very badly. I don't know what else to do. I can't take care of my house, myself and feel like I am a crappy Mom for my son.I have no money,  bank account is in the red and have no way to pay for anything. On top of all that, my Mom was diagnosed with mild dementia and I am all she has because my brother is being a douchebag and is looking for homes in Florida.  He is not speaking to us because I finally after years told his wife off and how I feel about her. Also he is trying to say that I am committing elder abuse because Mom has been helping me pay bills. Then my daughter said that she would have to testify against me and then I would lose my son to the state because she couldn't "take him right now. Maybe in a few years." This is her BROTHER and she doesn't want him. Like I really need this right now. I also had eye surgery on Friday to have benign tumors removed  I just don't know what to do. 

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Honored Social Butterfly

@KimberlyM389662 , it is SO HARD at times dealing with Family.

 

YOU ARE ONE AWESOME AND STRONG WOMAN!!!

 

Luv you,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

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Honored Social Butterfly

@DianeE3158 , I hope you will stop by AGAIN! Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

 


[*** DIANE @DianeE3158 wrote:

 My husband passed away on 2/22/24 and I am having a hard time emotionally.  I don't know what to do. It's like I am in a "brain fog". I need direction and I need help. Should I seek out a psychiatrist? I don't have any friends to talk to and I don't belong to any groups. I live in a tiny rural town. Any suggestions would be helpful. Thank you! ***]

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Silver Conversationalist

Diane, I'm sorry for your loss. A big loss, indeed. If you don't feel up to in person, an online counselor can be very helpful at this time. There are websites that offer free counseling. Building up a few resources can give you a sense of control and stability. Just do what you feel up to each day. Short walks, sunshine helps too. Please take care. 

Honored Social Butterfly

Yikes  @Cadee2719   😱😱😱  and SO SORRY this is happening  😭  HANG IN THERE STRONG LADY. As we always say 👣 (1 step). As we AGE, we will be "chauffered" around/lol. Try to do what you can. Please keep us updated when you can  🤗

 


[***  CADEE @Cadee2719 wrote:

 I need some "encouragement"!  Took my car in on the 17th.  Needs a new gas tank.  I was smelling gas.  They could not find the leak.   Ordered a new tank on the 18th.  They called me on the 20th. - BACKORDERED!!!!!!  I told them I have doctor appointments next week and they CANNOT keep my car for a week and not fix it.   S T I L L    W A I T I N G...........  ***]


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Bronze Conversationalist

Just got my car back.  Hoping they really fixed it!  We shall see.  One more Step Forward. 

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