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Conversationalist

Balance Matters Too

A recent widower and I chatted during a volunteer effort.  He was surprisingly empathetic and kind as a stranger to me.  Goes to show what I have been experiencing in the last 2 years!  I guess the unexpected can happen.  He made a very astute comment about experiencing the loss of his wife to cancer.  Yes, he went through much of the trauma that I and others went through.  The aftermath was hard as well and as he shared “it is hard to get equilibrium back.”  Yes, he is right.  Upon reflection, I have been out of balance and part of the struggle has been getting that equilibrium back.  That means different things to different grievers.  I am still exploring that myself.  I know I need quiet time to reflect and ponder my new single identity.  Still struggling with that word.  I also am making a concerted effort to socialize with individuals I can connect with, communicate without judgement leading to trust and strong social bonds.  The word quality is important in spending this balanced time.  Not always easy or controllable but for me a goal since time is limited in more ways than we would like to acknowledge.  Just wanted to share some new thoughts from others in this New Year.  Your friend, Sue

Silver Conversationalist

Thank you for sharing your insights, Sue. When we're on our own taking care of everything we can definitely get out of kilter. I take certain things, like understanding an insurance matter, or a worry of some kind to different people. So I don't overwhelm any one person lol  A few good smart sensible people can help to balance life, when there's a lot at once to decide on. Its sometimes surprising where I find support I need during the day. Its getting to be more people I deal with each day. And as soon as we talk I see the burdens and worries in their eyes and expressions. So what can I do to make their day brighter or easier. Things get balanced out better that way. Sharing the load. Stopping to listen or going for a walk with another adds to well being, a form of balance.

 

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Honored Social Butterfly

[comment deleted by Nicole]

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Conversationalist

Hi, Nicole, I guess you are right.  I am trying to balance change with maintaining stability.  Another balancing act.  I think it is crucial to find the right combination and perhaps experimentation is necessary to get the right fit for each of us.  

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