@e399438h I can "hear" the heartache and stress in your writing - it's a terrible predicament. I hope we can help. First, a question - is your mother slated to have the hip replacements? Is that a possibility for her? If so, then, as @RobyneR472196 mentioned, after her surgery(s) Medicare would likely pay for rehab in a facility to help her get to the point where she can get around and care better for herself. If the surgery isn't possible for her, or if she doesn't have a hospitalization for any other reason, then Medicare won't pay for nursing facility or in-home care - even if she could get some home care with Medicare, it wouldn't be ongoing and would just be for a limited time. But it might get her through a rough spot.
Is her income low enough for her to qualify for Medicaid? If so, and their assessment finds that she qualifies for a certain level of care needed that would normally be provided in a facility, as @t857318s mentioned, depending on the state you live in, they may have a Medicaid "waiver" (sometimes called "Cash & Counseling", but usually states have their own names for the programs)program that allows them to use Medicaid funds to pay for in-home care instead of care in a nursing facility. For some of these programs, the recipient also has the ability to pay family members to care for them.
So - the first step is to contact the local Area Agency on Aging (AAA) and find out what your mother qualifies for. You can find the AAA phone number by visiting the Eldercare Locator and using your mother's zip code to search. Ask about any in-home care possibilities for free, low cost or sliding fee scale services. Ask if they can do a free in-home assessment. Usually they, (or the local Aging and Disabilities Resource Center (ADRC), which you can also find at the Eldercare Locator - often it's the same agency as the AAA), can help assess, guide you to services and in applying for Medicaid and/or refer you to a local Medicaid office.
I hope this is helpful! Please do let us know how things are going and if you have any further questions!
Take care,
Amy Goyer, AARP Family & Caregiving Expert
Author, Juggling Life, Work and Caregiving and
Color Your Way Content When Caring for Loved Ones