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Re: Expert Series: Managing Stress & Anxiety: Q&A with Dr. Barry Jacobs and Dr. Julie Mayer

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Message 11 of 48

@m658531j 

I can't help you find a more convenient housing arrangement, but I can address your caregiving situation. First, I think you should acknowledge that you have done a good job advocating for and caring for your mother during an especially challenging time. You've altered your life to be there for your mother, which isn't easy at all and I think you should feel proud of yourself for the efforts and sacrifices you've made. You're already doing some great self-care: walking, talking, prayer, journaling and reading. If you aren't already doing the following, you might try turning to your church community for support (if you have one), and finding time to socialize with friends and family (at a distance or over a video platform) so you don't feel too isolated. With regard to your living arrangements, you and your mother might talk about how to set up her home so that you have a little more of your own space. 

All the best,

Julie

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Re: Expert Series: Managing Stress & Anxiety: Q&A with Dr. Barry Jacobs and Dr. Julie Maye

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Message 12 of 48

Hi @GloriaR16327 --Sounds like this has been a very tough time. Are there ways you could de-stress? Talk with your kids on the phone? Stay away from the person you live with? Talk walk outside (while wearing a mask) and enjoying nature? Doing deep breathing? There are websites you can look at and books that you can read that will teach you stress management techniques. Speaking as a bald guy, I don't want your hair to fall out! Good luck!--Barry

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Re: Expert Series: Managing Stress & Anxiety: Q&A with Dr. Barry Jacobs and Dr. Julie Maye

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Message 13 of 48

@DrJulie  With some locations opening back up, how do we navigate conversations with friends and family who have different perspectives on how to stay safe and what is responsible behavior?

 

Some people feel like guidelines are too strict while others feel they aren’t strict enough. How can we establish ways of socializing that feel save from both perspectives?

AARPTeri
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Re: Expert Series: Managing Stress & Anxiety: Q&A with Dr. Barry Jacobs and Dr. Julie Mayer

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Message 14 of 48

@GloriaR16327 

I'm glad to hear that you are trying your best, but sorry to hear that you are feeling so stressed. I don't blame you. It's a hardship to be apart from your family, and for such a long time. And even more challenging, you are living with someone who isn't so easy to live with. Hair loss can sometimes be a stress symptom and it's possible that you are experiencing that. It might be worthwhile to see a doctor about that though, in case there is some other medical cause.

 

To manage your stress, I hope you are finding it possible to take some time for yourself, whether it's to take a walk, listen to music, read a book, watch a movie, whatever might take you out of the moment and bring you a little relaxation. I hope you are able to talk with your grandchildren and other family even if you can't see them. These are difficult times. We all need to find ways to cope the best we can.

Julie

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Re: Expert Series: Managing Stress & Anxiety: Q&A with Dr. Barry Jacobs and Dr. Julie Maye

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Message 15 of 48

I am 50 years strong with a mother that has recently been dealing with issues concerning her total knee replacement (Dec 2019). There were a number of medical issues that resulted in her remaining in the hospital for a week following the surgery. Afterwards, Mom (80 plus) experienced a number of challenges following the surgery that required her to go into a rehabilitation center for two weeks. The hardest job I’ve experienced was to be an advocate for the care of my mother. The elderly population is viewed differently and when your an African American it is twice as difficult to receive quality care without making others give an account. And now with COVID-19 it has presented a strain on the recovery and healing process on so many levels. I’ve placed some of my responsibilities on hold to address the needs of my mother’s care ADL. Prior to the surgery she was living alone and now I’ve moved into her home. I am so proud of the gains she has demonstrated but I find myself wanting to have a home that would encompassed both our homes. A mother-in law home/loft would be the perfect solution; That would be apart of the main home. If anyone living in St. Louis knows of such living quarters please feel free to share. Signed a daughter that is sandwiched between two families. Welcome feedback and suggestions for my own self care beyond walking, talking, prayer, journaling and reading. 

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Re: Expert Series: Managing Stress & Anxiety: Q&A with Dr. Barry Jacobs and Dr. Julie Maye

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Message 16 of 48

trying my best  because this  thing we are going though.cant be with my kids grandkids and family the why I'm strees.And the person I'm living makes me more stress Even my hair is falling

 

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Re: Expert Series: Managing Stress & Anxiety: Q&A with Dr. Barry Jacobs and Dr. Julie Mayer

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Message 17 of 48

@m578924d ,

I don't think you are blowing things out of proportion. Your safety is extremely important. I wonder if you'd feel better if you spoke to your employer about their plans for bringing people back. If you learn more about their plan, you may feel like you can handle it. Since you have been able to work from home for over two months, I wonder whether, given your health concerns, you'd be permitted to continue to work from home for a while longer. If it's the transportation you're concerned about, try to think about whether there is a work-around. Do you know someone who can drive you? Can you carpool? Many of us are trying to come up with the safest way to proceed. Sometimes a creative solution can be found. I hope you can find some peace about this. Sleep is so important for the immune system. You need to get a good night's rest.

Wishing you all the best,

Julie

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Re: Expert Series: Managing Stress & Anxiety: Q&A with Dr. Barry Jacobs and Dr. Julie Maye

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Message 18 of 48

I work full time and have been working from home since March 13, 2020.  During the period of March through the present, I have lost 2 family members as well as several friends and acquaintances to Covid-19.    

 

This year I will be 73 years old and under CDC guidelines, I am classified as being among the most vulnerable.  I know my employer is preparing to call us back to work soon but without a vaccine I am terrified of having to ride in any vehicle whose prior occupants and cleanliness are unknown.

 

I do not want to be an alarmist and I certainly do not want to become paranoid but I am literally terrified.  I do not sleep most nights because I really believe that if I contract this virus, with all of my health issues, I have little chance of surviving. 

 

Am I blowing things out of proportion?  Do I need therapy of some kind?  Am I going crazy?  What is your advice to me?

 

Marie

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Re: Expert Series: Managing Stress & Anxiety: Q&A with Dr. Barry Jacobs and Dr. Julie Maye

802 Views
Message 19 of 48

@BeverlyH245887 

 

Hi Beverly,

 

     That sounds like a terrible experience! You must feel traumatized by it! I am not a physician and can't answer your specific question about the blood transfusion's effect on your immune system. I suggest you contact your primary care provider with your concerns. He or she should be able to give you a better sense of whether or not you are facing greater risks. I wish you luck in recovering physically and emotionally from this medical issue. Take care and stay well, Barry

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Re: Expert Series: Managing Stress & Anxiety: Q&A with Dr. Barry Jacobs and Dr. Julie Maye

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Message 20 of 48

I was doing good social distancing until I had to go to the emergency room last week due to a complication with a routine procedure. I nearly bled out and died; had to have a blood transfusion, and have been recuperating slower than I'd like now that I am home. How will this blood transfusion affect my immune system response? Do I need to be even more careful now than I was before?

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