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Periodic Contributor


I am 77 and a widow for 18 months. Doing ok as a widow, but feeling so depressed with my age. No one to talk to.

never thought this would happen to me!

Honored Social Butterfly

I'm switching from personal depression to that of combat veterans that commit suicide at the rate of 20+ per DAY!  This country has and still is failing our veterans when it comes to being helped with combat fatigue. This has been true going back to WW1. It has been known by many names but there has been little help coming from  our government and the VA.





Posted by Dave the Lighthouse Keeper
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Dear @hi258


I am in denial abort being 69 and I lost my partner of 28 years two years ago this week,

I want to THANK YOU, because I have this Yankee Candle burning for him ( yee gads) all week


But as I said I am a major person that deals heavily n denial, so I became an exercise Freak and rode my bicycle for up to about  15 miles per day..But then it
HIT ME LIKE A TON OF BRICKS.................the depression. and then the Dr's and all.


What Put my gig saw puzzle of life back into order was a very charming movie called 'The Little Boy'. He becomes friends with a Elderly Japanese gentlemen,. The young boy is sitting on a bench by the sea and the Man approached him and said :" The only regret that I have in my life is that I was not able to say good by to my wife. She was in a coma and  the following day she died.". That was my Ah Ha moment and exactly what what happened in my case.


So I would suggest that you find and plan some adventure and explore. That is what I am going to do once the weather becomes decent n the NE.


But I cannot advice you because we're all different. All I can can is tat you are not alone in this issue, but for me I found AARP and play their game for several hours and watch LOTS of Movies.


I missed my Honey and People in general but this Covid issue certainly ha put a damper on man peoples lives..


I don't know if I will ever be able to find this site and or this section


But I send you my Hugs. Tickles and Giggles







Silver Conversationalist

I hope you were able to make that happen.  🙂

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Honored Social Butterfly

To all of my AARP and Veteran friends please pass this on!

Covid has been here for 9+ months now....and winter is looming. Mental health issues related to our lock down and the pandemic are especially hard for people with depression and other mental health disorders. NAMI, The National Alliance on Mental Illness has a 24-hour helpline: 800-950-6264. The relapse and overdose rate has increased by 30% since March 2020.

The Federal Communications Commission (FCC) designated 988 as the three-digit number on July 16, 2020, paving the way for this important step forward in mental health support in this country. We look forward to working with the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), the FCC and others to ensure that the 988 phone number, and the necessary infrastructure to support this essential service, are available to the public on or before July 16, 2022. Until that time, we encourage people in need of support to continue calling the Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

Confidential Support Is a Call Away
If you’re a Veteran in crisis or concerned about one, there are caring, qualified VA responders standing by to help 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Call 1-800-273-8255 and Press 1
The Veterans Crisis Line is a free, anonymous, confidential resource that’s available to anyone, even if you’re not registered with VA or enrolled in VA health care.

I’m asking my small corner of AARP to follow suit: Could any two of my AARP friends just copy and repost to share the helpline far and wide?  ARRP offers several areas that offer a chance to find help and make friends! I hope many people find the Front Porch as a place to come to and find some friendship on the internet! Remember that there are a lot of people here that are looking for you to be their friend also. If you have a relative that is or has been in the military be sure to reach out to them.

Please be safe and remember you will always have friends here on the Front Porch!


Assessing Mental Health:


Posted by Dave the Lighthouse Keeper
Bronze Conversationalist

Thank you for passing on this very important information.   It's never a sign of weakness to ask for help from someone...quite the opposite.  Be well.

Silver Conversationalist

Just when you least expect it, just what you least expected!


Depression can happen to anyone. It doesn't matter who we are or what age we are, depression is an equal opportunity joy stealer.I know because I've suffered from depression for years now. That's the bad news but the good news is is that it's manageable.


I often visit a website called  They have many groups and resources that deal with things like depression, loneliness, grief and just about any other type of mental health issue you might think of. There ar live online chats you can participate in and they have online therapists, for a fee of course, who can help you as soon as right now! They also have volunteers called Listeners who don't cost a thing but they can listen to what it is that you're feeling and maybe offer some suggestions about what worked for them when they were caught up in a similar situation. It doesn't cost anything to become a member but there is so much more to the site that I can elaborate on here. 


Here's a screenshot of my member page to give you some idea of what they offer. I hope that you can find some help, if not here, then at some other place that you feel comfortable with. Good luck to you!


Click here to visit now 





It's nice to be important but it's more important to be nice.
Honored Social Butterfly

Crisis services and planning for a crisis

This guide explains what mental health crisis services are available, how they can help and when to access them. It also explains how you can plan for a crisis. If you're feeling in crisis right now, see our emergency advice.

Mental health crisis helplines

If you're in crisis and need to talk right now, there are many helplines staffed by trained people ready to listen. They won't judge you, and could help you make sense of what you're feeling. 

  • Samaritans. To talk about anything that is upsetting you, you can contact Samaritans 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. You can call 116 123 (free from any phone), email or visit some branches in person. You can also call the Welsh Language Line on 0300 123 3011 (7pm–11pm every day).
  • SANEline. If you're experiencing a mental health problem or supporting someone else, you can call SANEline on 0300 304 7000 (4.30pm–10.30pm every day).
  • The Mix. If you're under 25, you can call The Mix on 0808 808 4994 (Sunday-Friday 2pm–11pm), request support by email using this form on The Mix website or use their crisis text messenger service.
  • Papyrus HOPELINEUK. If you're under 35 and struggling with suicidal feelings, or concerned about a young person who might be struggling, you can call Papyrus HOPELINEUK on 0800 068 4141 (weekdays 10am-10pm, weekends 2pm-10pm and bank holidays 2pm–10pm), email or text 07786 209 697.
  • Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM). If you identify as male, you can call the Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM) on 0800 58 58 58 (5pm–midnight every day) or use their webchat service.
  • Nightline. If you're a student, you can look on the Nightline website to see if your university or college offers a night-time listening service. Nightline phone operators are all students too.
  • Switchboard. If you identify as gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender, you can call Switchboard on 0300 330 0630 (10am–10pm every day), email or use their webchat service. Phone operators all identify as LGBT+.
  • C.A.L.L. If you live in Wales, you can call the Community Advice and Listening Line (C.A.L.L.) on 0800 132 737 (open 24/7) or you can text 'help' followed by a question to 81066.
  • Helplines Partnership. For more options, visit the Helplines Partnership website for a directory of UK helplines. Mind's Infoline can also help you find services that can support you. If you're outside the UK, the Befrienders Worldwide website has a tool to search by country for emotional support helplines around the world.

"Once a girl actually answered the phone and kept me talking through my thoughts and suicidal feelings for almost three hours! To her I shall be eternally grateful!"

How could they help me?

Listening line staff will let you talk through your feelings and experiences without judging you or telling you what to do. Many listening services let you talk for as long as you need.


Before calling a helpline, you might want to consider:

  • What times are they open?
  • Is it free to call or is there a cost involved?
  • Is what you say confidential? For example, many services have policies on what to do if someone says they have attempted suicide or are actively planning to.
  • What will you do if the line is busy? It's often worth trying several times, or you might plan to call back later or try a different service.

You might be able to find this information on the organisation's website, or you could ask the advisor to explain their policies during the call.

"I saw the number of a charity crisis line (similar to Samaritans), phoned and someone listened and had time, which actually helped me."

If you can't talk on the phone

As well as phone numbers to call, some organisations routinely offer support in other ways – which could include emails, text messages or web chat. Or you might need to make a specific request:

This information was published in October 2018. We will revise it in 2021.

References are available on request. If you would like to reproduce any of this information, see our page on permissions and licensing.

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Posted by Dave the Lighthouse Keeper
Honored Social Butterfly

This seems to be a good time to revisit all types and levels of mental health care!

Given the world around us with Covid-19, the economy, joblessness, the political climate, trying to stay safe and well while we as Seniors try to survive these many challenges.

No matter the issue it is best to talk with someone and not bottle it up within your self!


Self Help Line:




SAMHSA’s National Helpline – 1-800-662-HELP (4357)
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SAMHSA’s National Helpline is a free, confidential, 24/7, 365-day-a-year treatment referral and information service (in English and Spanish) for individuals and families facing mental and/or substance use disorders.


Frequently Asked Questions What is SAMHSA’s National Helpline?

SAMHSA’s National Helpline, 1-800-662-HELP (4357), (also known as the Treatment Referral Routing Service) or TTY: 1-800-487-4889 is a confidential, free, 24-hour-a-day, 365-day-a-year, information service, in English and Spanish, for individuals and family members facing mental and/or substance use disorders. This service provides referrals to local treatment facilities, support groups, and community-based organizations. Callers can also order free publications and other information.



Posted by Dave the Lighthouse Keeper
Honored Social Butterfly


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Regular Contributor

It's hard to get out and meet people when you're depressed. But, suggestions; your local rec center has free glasses & exercise machines for older people & you're bound to talk to people there. Exercise helps with depression.


Groups; this is hard if you've never been a joiner, but worth being brave for


a bereavement group might help; you say you're doing okay with being a widow, but it could be grief.


there are many people like you, who are lonely and need someone to talk to; it would help if you can find them. In Tina Fey's biography, she talks about being a lonely and outcast kid & she remembers seeing others like her at school. Tina wondered why it never occurred to them to talk with each other.


Are you an animal person? Maybe a dog and/or cat? They make great companions (of course, you still need human companionship.



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