WE ARE SORRY for your loss 💛

[SummerOnTheWay1]

THIS GROUP IS OPEN TO ALL GRIEVERS NO MATTER HOW LONG IT HAS BEEN [years,days].

To participate, click on reply button at bottom of this post. Enter your comment. Click on reply again.

Grief & Loss Team  🤗

[SummerOnTheWay1]

CAREGIVER Grief: Resources are available for caregivers dealing with "ambiguous loss"—the emotional pain of losing a loved one's presence while still caring for them.

[SummerOnTheWay1]

MEN and Grief: Research shows men may suffer more intensely after losing a spouse, often requiring specific outreach and support.

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌🕯‌‌‌‌‌‌‌  DECISIONS that often cause people distress!!!

*** Please "take your time" with these decisions & deal with life the "best" YOU CAN. 💛🤗

(1) When to SORT through their loved one's belongings.

(2) Whether or not to take OFF their wedding ring.

(3) When to RETURN to work.

(4) How often to VISIT the cemetery.

(5) Whether or not to SELL or move.

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌   SIGNS from love ones!

A source of COMFORT on those days/nights when we NEED IT.

(1) Timing: SIGNS often appear when they are most needed, such as on anniversaries, birthdays, or in moments of distress, according to a blogger at O'Connor Mortuary.

(2) Intuition: They are described as giving a sense of peace, love, or comfort, rather than fear.

(3) Directness: They often feel too specific to be coincidences, appearing personal to the relationship you shared.

*** When we get "quiet" (relax, meditate) & "believe" - they will contact us!

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌🤔‌‌‌‌‌‌ ‌  REMEMBER - on those days/nights when YOU wonder WHY you are still here???

*** YOU are still here for the folks who CARE ABOUT YOU!!!

(1) So get out of bed EVERY DAY, hug them, tell them you CARE.

(2) This way when YOU ARE GONE, mixed in with THEIR GRIEVING will be GOOD MEMORIES.

(3) Parents [I am one] OUR KIDS [even adults] need their ONE PARENT - you.

Luv,

Nicole  ‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌ ‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌  (Grief Forum)

[SummerOnTheWay1]

At what AGE is grief the hardest? Children under 5 years old!

‌‌‌➡️‌‌‌[*** Children under the age of five will NOT understand the finality of death. Very young children often think that death is reversible and that their person who died CAN COME BACK.

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌♻️‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌   ARE YOU NEW TO OUR FORUM [Grief & Loss]? ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤔‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

[1] You can either create a NEW POST or JOIN another post created by another member to share YOUR JOURNEY.

[2] IF you need help with anything on THIS SITE, you can "reply" to this post or send me a PM (AARP Private Message).

[3] WE have ALL been "new" at some point & this site can be a "challenge" to use.

Grief & Loss Team ‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌ ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

[SummerOnTheWay1]

📸[*** .gif attached] WE care about YOU!!!

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌💡‌‌‌‌   PARENTS!

For those of us who are parenting on OUR OWN, remember no matter how old our children are - THEY NEED US.

So take care of yourself (medical appointments, sleep, eat, hydrate and so on) FOR THEM. ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

Luv,

Nicole ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌ ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌ (Grief Forum)

[SummerOnTheWay1]

Allowing EMOTIONAL release: Cry, journal, talk, or use art to express feelings.

‌‌‌‌‌‌➡️‌‌‌‌‌‌[*** Sometimes we may feel we are on a Rollercoaster Ride. But like those rides, we will have "opportunities" to get off our ride. TREASURE those "opportunities" & know with time we will have MORE "peaceful" moments. ‌‌

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌👣‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌   Creating a NEW LIFE AFTER A LOSS is not easy, but we will ONE STEP AT A TIME.

Sometimes in life WE NEED TO TAKE A STEP BACKWARD.

Why?

WE may have thought we had a SOLUTION to an "issue" only to find it IT WAS NOT A FIT.

It is okay. You got out there dear friend(s) INSTEAD OF STAYING IN BED sleeping your life away.

It is OKAY to "step backwards" to REGROUP & TRY AGAIN when you are ready.

Luv,

Nicole  ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌  (Grief Forum)

[SummerOnTheWay1]

Guess what? ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌ ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤔‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

WE made it through ANOTHER day/night!!!

And yes, maybe a little bruised but WE DID IT. ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

Luv,

Nicole ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌ (Grief Forum)

[SummerOnTheWay1]

Find "Listening Posts": Seek out PATIENT friends or support groups who allow you to talk without trying to "fix" your pain.

[MarianS446683]

 Hi my name is Marian. My husband, Gary, died two months ago. I do like to talk about his death as it helps me process it. I lost my first husband 2009. Married Gary in 2016. What a life I have had. I’m not bitter or mad. I’m just lonely. 😏

[SummerOnTheWay1]

[5/27/26] Dear Marian @MarianS446683 , so sorry for your loss. Sounds like you have found a way to "deal" with your loss. GOOD for you!!! 👍

Unfortunately, I am very bitter at losing him unexpectedly (COVID).

Yes, feeling lonely can be a challenge some days/nights.

Do you have family & friends nearby?

I hope you will stop by AGAIN.

Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗  (Grief Forum)

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➡️[*** MARIAN @MarianS446683 wrote:

 Hi my name is Marian. My husband, Gary, died two months ago. I do like to talk about his death as it helps me process it. I lost my first husband 2009. Married Gary in 2016. What a life I have had. I’m not bitter or mad. I’m just lonely. 😏

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[SummerOnTheWay1]

Rushing or Ignoring Grief: Do not try to "be strong" or force yourself to get over it quickly. Grief has no timeline, and suppressing it can make it resurface later in destructive ways.

[DenaAria]

I am a 53 yr old adult with ASD. My dad was really the only family I had. We always celebrated our bdays together, mine April 3- he fell and had to have brain surgery. Never recovered. Passed on April 10. His bday May 4- I was so lost without him. I feel broken. I feel like the world just got so big and confusing. I dont know how to live without him. Who do I call when life is hard? Who do I have lunch with? Go shopping with? Or celebrate my bday with? I don't know how to do this. I don't want to. 

[SummerOnTheWay1]

[5/27/26] Dear Dena @DenaAria , I am so sorry for your loss dear friend.

Sounds like he was your best friend and that is so hard NOT having him around.

Grief in my "very humble" opinion is a JOURNEY. A journey where we "figure" things out as we travel.

Taking "1 step at a time" when I can has HELPED me to MOVE FORWARD.

Now I do have days/nights where all I want to do is stay in BED. It is like, why go on?

But knowing my only child's father left me in charge is what KEEPS ME MOVING. She "needs" her ONE parent.

Another thing that keeps me MOVING FORWARD is "Mister" - a cat that needed a home. Left behind by his humans May 2024 when they moved. Little did I know what a "comfort" he was. My boy!

Lastly, I did a FEW MONTHS of counseling. She "understood" my depression & anger. Anger that he left me so suddenly (COVID). We had planned on growing OLD together.

I hope you will stop by AGAIN.

Luv,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗  (Grief Forum)

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➡️[*** DENA @DenaAria wrote:

I am a 53 yr old adult with ASD. My dad was really the only family I had. We always celebrated our bdays together, mine April 3- he fell and had to have brain surgery. Never recovered. Passed on April 10. His bday May 4- I was so lost without him. I feel broken. I feel like the world just got so big and confusing. I dont know how to live without him. Who do I call when life is hard? Who do I have lunch with? Go shopping with? Or celebrate my bday with? I don't know how to do this. I don't want to. 

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[HighDesertLolly]

 I would like to participate in this group

[SummerOnTheWay1]

[5/27/26] Welcome @HighDesertLolly !!! SO GLAD you stopped by.

There are NO rules or guidelines.

We ALL post (sharing how we are feeling or experiencing) & support each other as we are able.

Some days/nights, we are okay.

Others, we are NOT.

Do you want to tell us about your loss?.

NO pressure to do this. Whatever is "comfortable" for you is fine with us.

Luv,

Nicole 💛🤗

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➡️[*** @HighDesertLolly wrote:

 I would like to participate in this group

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[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌👖‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌👕‌‌‌‌‌     When YOU feel READY, go through your loved one’s clothes and other personal items.

(1) Instead of parting with everything at once, you might make three piles: one to keep, one to give away, and one “not sure.” Ask your children or others to help.

(2) Think about setting aside items such as a special piece of clothing, watch, favorite book, or picture to give to your children or grandchildren as personal reminders of your loved one.

[SummerOnTheWay1]

Think in Cycles: Understand that grief is not linear. You may feel fine one day and terrible the next; this is normal, not a regression.

[SummerOnTheWay1]

📸[*** .gif attached] Just in case YOU need one, WE are sending one YOUR way 🤗💛

[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌♻️‌‌‌‌   Feeling LONELY with the passing of someone you CARED about?

(1) WE are ALWAYS here to "listen".

(2) Different TIME ZONES means someone is "available" 24/7.

(3) And our AARP Experts Amy @agoyer & Jane @JaneCares have SUPPORTED us throughout the years.

Have a QUESTION for them - ask away!!!

(4) Keep in mind Group Members have "experienced" loss too = WE UNDERSTAND & SUPPORT EACH GROUP MEMBER.

Grief & Loss Team  ‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌

[BocaWoman]

In August, my husband of 26 years fell down the stairs of our new Florida apartment and died five days after we moved here. I cry everyday!!!  

[SereneSeagull]

I’m so sorry for your unexpected loss, @BocaWoman . That’s really hard. I would imagine it’s been hard to cope without him. For many people getting involved in volunteering or activities can keep the mind and hands busy.  It doesn’t stop the pain of loss, but can occupy one’s mind and keep from being enveloped in the horrible sadness.  I’m sorry for your pain. It can be hard without the people we love.  What gives me comfort when my mind starts down that sad feeling, is to know my loved one loved me and would not want me to isolate and feel discouraged and sad.  It’s hard at times to remember that, but it has helped me through many a time.  Take care of yourself.  

[SummerOnTheWay1]

[5/27/26] Dear @BocaWoman , I am so sorry for your loss!!! Yes, I have my days of "crying" over the loss of my other half. Not sure IF the "tears" ever stop. Lost him to COVID. At age 67, I "envy" the senior couples, but HAPPY for them at the same time. Do you have family/friends around you? I am in Virginia and my only child in Florida. Way too EXPENSIVE to live there but plan on joining her when the state of Virginia takes away my Driver's License. Or I can NOT live on my own. Have you tried Grief Counseling or maybe a Grief Support Group in your area? I did a few months of counseling to get me "balanced" = someone who listened & let me cry. Hated BURDENING my daughter who has "bounced" back nicely. It is what her father wanted for her. Do you have any pets? I do. A cat by the name of Mister. My boy & comfort on the days/nights when the tears just will NOT stop. Some of this group has found VOLUNTEERING helps. I have NOT found a "fit" as yet. I DONOT do well with "losing" animals, so canceled that thought. The same with "old" people. I know their time is nearer than mine, and just CANNOT deal with more loss right now. Okay, I have rambled on here. I hope you will stop by to see us again.

Luv,

Nicole 🤗🤗🤗 (Grief Forum)

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➡️[*** @BocaWoman wrote:

In August, my husband of 26 years fell down the stairs of our new Florida apartment and died five days after we moved here. I cry everyday!!!  

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[Sstholder]

My heart aches for you. In 2007, my husband had a motorcycle accident and died within two months of the accident. I was devastated, caught off guard, and felt a host of other emotions. Sending you a virtual hug. 

[SummerOnTheWay1]

[5/27/26] Dear @Sstholder , I am so sorry for your "loss" dear friend. We all plan on growing OLD with the luv of our lives.

I feel I will ALWAYS "miss" him.

I am SO GLAD you stopped by & hope you will AGAIN!!!

Luv,

Nicole  🤗 🤗🤗 (Grief Forum)

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➡️[*** @Sstholder wrote:

My heart aches for you. In 2007, my husband had a motorcycle accident and died within two months of the accident. I was devastated, caught off guard, and felt a host of other emotions. Sending you a virtual hug. 

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[SummerOnTheWay1]

‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌💡‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌   A Suggestion!!!

Explore YOUR area to find spots that may bring you COMFORT.

Some of us DREAD the old familiar hangouts we had with our luv ones.

Maybe one day WE will be able to visit them WITHOUT tears. But until then, EACH day maybe "act" like a TOURIST.

SO MANY possibilities out there.

SO MANY new friends to meet.

You got this!!!  ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌

Luv,

Nicole   ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌🤗‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌   (Grief Forum)‌