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Esteemed Social Butterfly

🙃 GRATITUDE while we heal!

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Trusted Social Butterfly

 

Like many I, customarily, say grace before a meal. I still use a standard prayer I learned as a child. It expresses gratitude for the sustenance and beseeches a higher power for blessings upon those sharing the meal so it covers the bases pretty well.

Over the years I have learned the value of having a routine to add stability and reduce stress from day to day. I have also, to some extent, become aware of the hazard of losing sight of the value of a routine by letting it devolve into a mind-numbing ritual of thoughtless memorized repetition. So as I'm saying grace, I think about the contents of the meal and where they came from.

The where they came from part includes the weather which is essential to all life on earth. Since I work nights this sometimes leads me to finding a way to be grateful for the weather even on dark, cloudy nights. In this context I also find myself able to be grateful for various other weather conditions and natural processes that might otherwise be overlooked as undesirable or distasteful.

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Silver Conversationalist

The Final Goodbye

I was thinking of this topic. My daughter and I were en route to the hospital when he died. We got there a half hour after he passed. I am usually a strong person. Except I couldn't bring myself to visit the few days before he died. I didn't want him to see how upset I was. But knowing what I know about life and end of life, I know there's a reason things happen as they do. They don't happen as we think they ought. Or plan. I was there for nearly 50 years. All the illnesses and caregiving. He would've died whether I was there or not. At least I am grateful he's not suffering like that anymore. 

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Esteemed Social Butterfly

(Saturday 1/6/24)

 

The book I am reading "The Secret Daily Reading" tells us to list 100 things we are grateful for each day  😱😱😱

 

Lol, TODAY - not feeling grateful, so had to "dig" deep down - think above my "tiredness" = GRATEFUL my daughter ARRIVED SAFELY in Atlanta for her Weekend Meeting...  💃💃💃

 

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100 a day seems excessive...hope the one you mentioned here was 'weighted' or 'handicapped' so it counted for 100!...seems reasonable to me.

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Hi, Nicole, gratitude, in my opinion and experience during grievance, has been a positive way for me to channel my energies and frustrations.  It also allows one to think of others while grieving and can add to socialization and filling the void left by your deceased loved one.  I am trying to think of ways to remind myself to be grateful and generous with my actions and feelings.  In this way, I am striving for better not bitter.  Too often I have now experienced very unhappy and toxic people who have let themselves live in self-pity and with no empathy.  I for one don't want to be in that club. It brings new-found joy when you help others, who in some ways, not always directly or immediately, also can bring peace of mind and new "joy". Making a difference matters.  Thanks for continuing to ask the questions.  Yours, Sue

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Thank you for sharing Sue. At times like this it's easy to listen to the self-pity, which I think a lot of greivers don't realize they are there. I look for hope. Self-hope is good. Don't think I've ever heard of self-hope. Sometimes one has to fight their way through the grief. It will happen at some very odd times. I 

 

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Esteemed Social Butterfly

(Friday 12/29/23)

 

Lol, TODAY is Day 2 of my book (The Secret Daily Teachings by Rhonda Byrne) and guess what the TOPIC is? Gratitude!!!  🤣😂

 

Okay, awesome but she recommends writing ONE HUNDRED things you are grateful for EACH DAY...  😱😱😱

 

Hmmm, I can do "maybe" one each day as I still "struggle" with this.

 

Hey, WITHIN A YEAR (the end of the book), I could have ONE HUNDRED!  👍

 

TODAY, I AM SO GRATEFUL my "only child and best friend" RESPONDED to ALL my texts TODAY. Usually she is too "busy" and may NOT respond. And forget about the NEXT day response. 🙄🙄🙄

 

Hmmm, got ANOTHER night (last night) of RESTFUL SLEEP. So grateful as I DO NOT "function" well on NO SLEEP or not enough.

 

Okay, that is two...

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Trusted Social Butterfly

I have often been told by people throughout my life that they have a hard time determining whether or not I'm being serious.  I can say, seriously, that I am grateful for Life, and the blesssing of Free Will, and I try to express that gratitude in my posts here...even when they sound kinda goofy.  I suppose some of the goofy sounding ones are a result of also being grateful for the Responsibility that is inherent with the blessing of Free Will and sometimes feeling at odds with a culture that often seems to make a game of ingoring that responsibility.

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Esteemed Social Butterfly

(Thursday 12/28/23)

 

Well, I ENJOY the "goofy" ones, thanks for stopping by Eric @EricC28201   💙💙💙

 

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Trusted Social Butterfly

Thanks @SummerIsTooHOT .

 

...not trying to belabor the point, but even this post might have some people snickering and wondering 'Grateful for Responsibility?...What's wrong with this picture?'.

By way of example:

More than half the benefit of operating a motor vehicle (whether for fun or practical purposes) is doing so responsibly.  No penalties for Moving Violations, no Property Damage, no Physical Injuries, and what the hell...maybe you let somebody change lanes or pull out of a driveway ahead of you just to show a little civility.

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Trusted Social Butterfly

For family and friends and good health when it comes my way..Being able to share true feelings on this site and the comments that help when one is down or just need to vent...A Peaceful  New Year to All.. May you find solace in coming to terms in the loss of those in your life .

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Silver Conversationalist

Thank you. 

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Hi, Nicole, thanks for sharing, particularly the quote.  I fully agree that gratitude is a great way to reorient your thinking.  When my husband first passed, due in part to poor medical advice and alternative treatment, expensive but lethal, I was very angry for many months.  Some of that anger was directed to the doctors, hospital, my husband's positive attitude and mostly me.  The old couda, woulda, shoulda mentality set in.  One day, I realized that as bad as those times were, there were also helpful and well-intentioned people, sometimes strangers, who were there for me and my husband.  I decided to go on a gratitude journey and reach out to them and thank them.  At first it was hard, but as I reflected, I realized that my husband and I had many individuals making his end of life easier.  It was a new day and a new way of thinking.  The black aura started to turn into shades of gray.  The healing started for me.  Thank you for bringing up this important way to address grief.  Have a great day.  Sue

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Esteemed Social Butterfly

2 comments (12/27/23)  Been a ROUGH 2 days, yes Christmas - BUT GRATEFUL at about 10:30pm ET TONIGHT, my "fog" has left!!!  💃💃💃

 

“Gratitude is one of the strongest and most transformative states of being. It shifts your perspective from lack to abundance and allows you to focus on the good in your life, which in turn pulls more goodness into your reality.” — Jen Sincero

 

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Hi, Nicole and the contributors to this blog.  I fully agree that gratitude has reoriented my way of thinking and is transformational.  In my view it is the next step in my journey.  Life is Active.  Life responds and we are invited to participate in that Life actively and fully (from a Christian devotional I just received).  Not sure what that all entails but will take it "one step at a time" and experiment.  There are no failures if you are true to yourself and learn from your experiences.  It is an ongoing adventure if you are open.  Good luck on your journey.  May it be a better New Year for all of us. Sue 🎆

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Silver Conversationalist

Glad you got through the rough days! Take care!

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