AARP Online Community and Discussion Forums - Re: MY mother passed away 1yr, ago at 91yrs. had d...

lp76762924 · ‎05-19-2016

I been reading everyones story, anyone taking care of a loved one believe me I know the stress,alone feeling, exhaustion. But I wouldn't have had any other way. Well 6 months after my mother passed I was served with court papers to sue me, by my nephews. For undue influence, elder abuse, financial abuse, disinhertance also remove me from being a trusee and any thing they can lie about they are. Well I would like to know if anyone has any advice I surely appreciate it. There father was omitted from the will because he was quite wealthy. His wife and my 3 nephews feel they should get a third of the estate, because my other brother made his two daughters in the will to share half. My father, my mother, my 2 brothers and ason I have lost in the last 5yrs. Our court date is not til August, I have lawyer but not helping. I say to all the caregivers everywhere you are hero;s.

TimothyD134981 · ‎12-13-2018

Hopefully your mother had a Will that specifically spells out what she wanted.

The Date of the Will also would be important.

my 2c is nephews/Nieces they don’t have a leg to stand on unless your brothers are mentioned.

1/3 divided by 2 is one sixth IF your rothers are mentioned.

i hope they don’t have some kind of proof of their allegations, but it sounds like you did your part 100% and have witnesses who can vouche for you.

Fire your do-nothing lawyer and find one who will close this once and for all. a

simple Lawyer letter will make them go away.

TC Daniel

AmandaSingleton · ‎01-08-2019

I hope that all worked out for you, original poster, and that you have had some time and opportunity to heal after so much loss and time caregiving.

TC Daniel, you make an excellent point and I wanted to chime in on it. A well-drafted will and accompanying documents are so important in making sure our wishes are followed and in reducing conflict among relatives.

In my law practice, it's more unusual for me to see a family all getting along and working together after a loved one dies than for me to see fractures, tensions, accusations of wrongdoing, and arguing. We can't stop people from trying to bring a claim or attempting to intervene in an estate, BUT we can effectively stop them at the courthouse door with the right plan in place. There's peace of mind in knowing that you can help your family through an already tumultous time by reducing the chances of legal disputes. It's a gift to yourself, and to your loved ones.

Amanda Singleton
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JaneCares · ‎05-31-2016

I am so sorry you've been through so much. for one thing, all the deaths, all the loss. 2 brothers? A son?!?! Both parents. I'm overwhelmed just thinking about the grief. within 5 years?

How are you taking care of yourself?

And then the insult of the suit. It's not so very unusual, and yet so very painful to have given so much in a caregiving situation, and then be sued. When there is money to fight over, families fight. And it's so sad. the relationships between the family members are so much more important. but litigation is poison to family ties. And the lawyers end up getting so much of the wealth! Absurd. Wrong.

Lp, how do you keep on?

Jane