Social Challenge: Week 1 One Small Win!

[AARPTeri]

Week 1:  What’s one small win you have had this week and one thing that’s been harder than expected?  Short answers welcome! Jump in even if you’re just getting started!

Want to join the challenge?  Here’s the URL:https://www.aarp.org/rewards/earn/socialchallenge/ 

[Jillcarl]

Had breakfast with a dear friend I hadn’t seen in 9 months. Such a special friend.

volunteered at this specific social event for the first. Thousands attended. Not being familiar with driving, parking there was difficult but I did it!

[SereneSeagull]

Well done! 👍

[TNTMOM]

I find it hard to overcome my own self talk "I can't remember names."  Kind of like "I can't do math."   

[SereneSeagull]

@TNTMOM  Hi, maybe try flipping it.   Take the negative or self deprecating thought process  I guess maybe it’s called, and change it to a lighter, less worrisome, burdensome feeling.  Like, “I’m going to have fun with people and be present with them, and not worry about trying to remember names as much”.

      At my gym there are probably anywhere from 25-30 people in a given class.  Some don’t come all the time, but many do, and then there will be new people as well.  It’s understandable and totally fine not to get everyone’s name.  We all talk waiting for a previous class to end.. The most important thing, and it’s palpable as a group, is being present and enjoying the moment with everyone.  Once you can lift the worry of not getting names, or negative reinforcements that might get in the way, and just be present in the situation with others, you will enjoy the social connection.  It tends to get easier.  Just be in the moment, and enjoy and let it happen.  Hang in there. 🙂

[TNTMOM]

I really appreciate your insights and encouragement!  Thank you.

[SereneSeagull]

👍🙂

[mahurrle]

Asked a neighbor to go out for dinner and we went and had a fabulous time.

[PamelaW565787]

Hi there.  Im taking the challenge too.  I went grocery shopping and ran into my new neighbor.  We exchanged cell numbers after a 10 minute chat.

[myndstate]

Excellent!

[RodW461225]

Beat Vally Fever!

[lindag382050]

Went to a meeting by myself - I usually would go to a table that did not have anyone at the table - today I went to a table that had 2 women sitting at the table and sat down and introduced my self to them.  As it turned out they had not introduced themselves to each other prior to my sitting down and introducing myself.  A win for all!

[SereneSeagull]

I love that @lindag382050 ,  You probably made their day too!

[MoMo1211]

I just scheduled an orientation for new volunteers at a local agency. I am a bit nervous but am excited to give back and hopefully help others while also meeting new people.

[myndstate]

You can do it!

[deborahc358885]

Win: Setting up dinner out with my children.

Hard: Not getting answers to an ongoing medical issue

[SheilaG623510]

 I enjoy talking the ladies where I do volunteer work once a week.

[SusanG75864]

One win:  My daughter is so busy she seldom visits so I texted her to ask if I could come over on a day convenient to her.  We set up a time and I arrived by the ADA bus service.  We had a good day.

Challenge:  Went to icecream social at my complex.  Tried to converse with others.  Washington Freeze hard to overcome.  Hard to make friends. I will keep trying.

[myndstate]

Happy to hear you had a good day with your daughter! This is a win that keeps on giving with all the great memories the two of you made.

[MarieN48752]

I saw Canadian geese with babies.

Hard: Not hearing from my daughter 

[TNTMOM]

Thanks for sharing, Marie.  Do you reach out to your daughter on the channel that she prefers?  For example, my young adult son responds to a text message but rarely picks up the phone.  Hang in there!

[myndstate]

• One small win I have had this week is finding a bag of Hershey's kiss in the refrigerator!
• One thing that's been harder than expected is losing the feeling of alienation at the church I attend.

[SusanG75864]

I know what you mean about feeling alienation at your church.  I joined a new church when I moved.  People were friendly and welcoming and pastor was kindly and wise.  Then he retired and new pastor began.  One of his first sermons was about the sin of living a gay life.  I am not gay but the sudden non-inclucividity of his sermon totally turned me off.  I did not go back.  A disappointment. 

[rl713]

Totally hear you, I Know what you're talking about. Remember church is made of people, it can't be perfect. Try a different church, God is always PERFECT!!

[SereneSeagull]

Yep, @SusanG75864 I absolutely detest the obnoxiously pious who preach to love all and cast stones while they do it. 

[AlbertC608581]

I'm excited to spend time with dear friends on a Museum and Lunch outing later this week.

[TNTMOM]

It's always so nice to have something to look forward to --- enjoy!

[TNTMOM]

I learned in one of the videos about something called Social Anxiety Disorder... and how common it is that people have a "fear of rejection" - curious if anyone within this conversation experiences this and if you have tips to overcome it. ??

[MichaelB193199]

Yes I've heard about this too and wondering if that is why it seems I'm always the one to start getting plans moving.  I haven't called them as I'm waiting on them to call me ... I want to call but I don't want to overstep or seem pushy as it's always me to make the 1st move.  We have a good time but now I'm believing it's their turn.  Maybe we are just not a good fit for being their friends.

[SereneSeagull]

@TNTMOM  I’ve developed over time, an I-Don’t-Care-attitude about this.  

Everyone cannot be liked by all.  It’s just the way it is.  To try and attain that, in my opinion, is a waste of time.  If someone doesn’t like the way I am, thats on them, not me.  It’s not going to get me upset, because it’s ok.  Not everyone is everyone else’s bag.  

    Baskin Robins has a large amount of different flavors, right?  So too, with people.  One gravitates to whom they have common interests, etc…

I belong to a gym and attend various classes.  When I see a new person I try and make a point of going up to them and introducing myself.  I will also try and introduce them to the other people or those standing next to the new person.  I enjoy myself, and honestly don’t care what others think of how intense I am in my strength training workouts, or adding flare to my dance moves.  It’s the I-Don’t-Care-What-Others-Think attitude.  And those who enjoy being with you and accept you for you, are the keepers in life.