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“He is not broken people-If I could see God!” Written By: Dorcas C. Chandler

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Where is He? One may ask themselves. How can I find Him? I want to touch Him; for I am so desperately in need of Him. I have searched all night looking for whom my soul is longing for, but everywhere I look, I can’t seem to find Him. My search has become overwhelming, I turn to the right, and then to the left but still I can’t find whom my soul loveth. I know that He exist and I know that He is there, but I can’t feel Him. I want to touch Him; oh, I yearn to see Him face to face. Why can’t I find whom my soul loveth?

Then I felt a warm gentle breeze that swept blissfully across my face and I turned my head swiftly to look behind me, but it was not God. It was a man eating out of a trash can. That could not be who my soul loveth. So I continued my search and walk a little further. Again, I yet felt another warm gentle breeze, but this time the breeze was not only warm and gentle, but it was as though someone had softly touched me on my right shoulder. I paused and turned in excitement and looked over my shoulder, thinking that maybe this is God showing up, but still again I saw a woman with matted hair, torn dirty clothing, and talking to herself and I know yet again that was not God. Oh, I became so perplexed in my mind; questions rushing through my head, my thoughts were out of control. Will I ever find God, If only I could see Him?

As I became tired of the journey, I began to gaze into the night sky. I could see miles of shinny stars, it was like fine glitter splattered everywhere lighting up the darken sky, and then to one side there was a bright full moon beaming its radiant light for the World to see. Why can’t I see God? Why can’t I feel God, I know He is their? I must continue my search no matter how dark the sky is, or how long it will take; I know that I will find God and the one whom my soul loveth.

As I walked, weary and tired of the journey, I came to a busy street; the stoplight was red and getting ready to change. Before I could cross the street, I felt yet another gentle breeze. This time the gentle breeze was pushing my body in a direction that I had not planned to go. What is going on, I pondered within myself. As I looked around the street, I changed my direction and followed the breeze. Even though I felt the breeze, it was as though it was not even blowing. Where is this breeze coming from, I thought to myself? The light changed green and I crossed the street. I saw a bus stop bench and no one was waiting on the bus, so I decided to sit down on the bench to rest by weary feet. I was not waiting on a bus I was waiting on God. Then a woman came from it seemed as if out of nowhere and was crying and broken. She was sobbing so loudly that I did not know what to say to her. She sat down next to me. I remained speechless and did not say a word to her. She was weeping louder and louder, as if she could not control herself. Then the bus came and she pulled herself up from the bench as if she had no strength left and got on it. That could not have been God for he is not broken.

After the bus pulled off, I did not know whether to get up and leave or to stay seated and continue to rest. I felt the woman’s pain, but yet I did not reach out to her, because I was looking for God, I did not want to miss Him. WOW, I wish God would just come, so I could end this search. I serve Him every day. I pray to Him and I am faithful in worshipping Him, where is He?

I decided to sit for a few more moments and then I would continue my search. In a distance, I saw a man walking down the street towards me and as I looked at him, I felt a calm gentle breeze over my face again. Wait a minute; I thought within myself, “What is this?” As I was looking at this man, and as he got closer to me; he was staggering and stumbling over both feet. This man has got to be drinking by the way that he was walking and he must be full of alcohol my thoughts led me to believe. Oh, no I don’t want to be bothered with no drunk tonight. I stood up to walk away and the man came up to me and asks for a dime. He said he was hungry. I did not even reply to him, I just look at him and turned and walked away. As I begin to walk, I saw another man in a wheelchair at the crosswalk. His arms were twisted and his legs looked as if they were stuck together. He was trying to get across the street. His tire from the wheelchair seems to be stuck in a crack on the curb; he could not move his motorized wheelchair. As I approached him, I saw his struggle and I wanted to stop and help him, but I could not stop and help because I was looking for the one whom my soul loveth and I did not want to miss God and let Him pass me by.

DORCAS C CHANDLER
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