Buffeted by the Black Shirts

[schlomo]

What a horror story!

[LouLit01]

My girl and I went to Hawaii back in the 80s. NWK to LAX to HNL. Walked into our hotel worn out and jet lagged. Washed up, changed clothes, had drinks and went out to see Waikiki. Stepped out of the Hyatt Regency lobby about 10 pm, saw a horse drawn carriage and hopped in. We're clopping slowly down the street next thing I know someone grabs me by the hair at the back of my head and drags me out of the carriage.

I shake the guy off trying to figure out what just happened and I see in his eyes he's a druggie. He starts screaming, "You were looking at me! You were looking at me!" I wasn't. All I could think to do was stand between him and my girlfriend in the carriage. My girlfriend was helping me out by screaming like a banshee. Thanks, babe. The carriage driver was ducked down in the front seat making believe he wasn't there.

So I'm faced off with the drugged out maniac and I see someone moving behind him. Great, it's two on one now. But his friend was less drugged out and he pulled the guy away from me. The guy and my girlfriend were both still screaming at me, the carriage driver peeks out over the front seat and motions me to get back in the carriage.

I had two drinks, a short carriage ride, and was assaulted within 45 minutes of wheels down in Honolulu.

So I feel for ya, brother.

[schlomo]

Buffeted by the Black Shirts

Midway during my walk in Waikiki yesterday, I spied a raggedy, black-shirted unmasked man ahead of me on a narrow street. I safely turned into the main road and accelerated my pace so that I could get past him. Then I got back on the street, presumably home free. But as I continued, I encountered another slow-moving unmasked, unsavory looking man in a black shirt. Just as I began to reroute myself, I heard raving, garbled obscenities from the man who I had earlier bypassed. I hoped that his rage wasn’t directed towards me for getting ahead of him.

While I rushed forward a few wide steps in front of the second black-shirted guy, he too began to scream incoherently, again possibly at me. As I gained more traction, I saw a third black-shirted unmasked man further down the street where I was progressing. As I got closer, he stared at me and unleashed some vile gibberish. Whoa!

I had to end this increasingly surreal scenario, so I took a quick detour through a hotel parking garage that shortened my walk but salved my nerves.

I am fond of the mellow operatic voices of the Three Tenors. They far surpass the screeching of the Three Terrors.