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Re: Where Have All The Singles Gone?

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Message 21 of 30
Prosecco, I have missed your posts. You have this wonderful way of writing. I totally agree with you that who we vote for should not determine who our friends are. I am blessed to have friends of different races, backgrounds, ages, etc. I hope to never limit myself by using tunnel vision.

I am going out on a limb now to share this. I have been single since 1981. Many, many years. Never in my single life have I asked a man out or even asked one to dance at a singles' club. Well, I have made the bold move to contact someone from my past and asked him to join me at a play. I knew his wife had died many years ago. A friend of his talked to me about him. I actually just gave the man my number to give to this man should he need any help. I know that sometimes being alone is difficult. He called me recently and we had fun on the phone describing ourselves as seniors. I mustered up my courage and called him again and asked if he would like to go to a play with me. He said he needed to check his calendar and I actually started to wish I had not made this move. I was afraid he didn't want to go. He called back the next day and said he would love to and asked details. I have told him I need a good male friend to replace the one I lost a year and a half ago I lost my best friend and someone who was like my brother. I hope this man can become a good friend. I am looking for no more, but have patted myself on the back for making this bold move.

Soosie
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Re: Where Have All The Singles Gone?

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Message 22 of 30

@Soosie wrote:
The ones on my Facebook page have the same political leanings as I have. I am always amazed when people show hatred toward someone just because they voted differently. We are all Americans and need to think that way.

Now, back to the singles' thing. I still laugh a bit about my post to the experts. She wrote something about when to become intimate. He wrote about when to talk about money. I wrote something like this....."Let me see if I understand, I should ask for the money before I drop my depends.?" That's when the trouble started.

Soosie

 Yes, it is amazing that people will shun you or show hatred because of  a personal decision to vote for a candidate they did not support.  

 

I am an Independent, so my decisions are not solely based upon political party but are, instead, based upon my own philosophy of a person's experience and preparedness for office, his ability to inspire and lead, his core beliefs regarding government and politics and his moral compass.  I think these qualities transcend political parties.  

 

I have come to feel that the political parties represented in the United States at present are not wholly adequate in covering all the bases for the generations following ours.  I predict that as our elected representatives are becoming collectively younger, there will be a big push to examine what the parties' believe in and advocate for and there will be an increasing consensus for change. 

 

I usually don't talk about whom I voted for and even whom I did not vote for.  This election year was different.  Many of us had a difficult choice to make and stood up to the challenge.  I still haven't divulged who I voted for but I have owned up to who did NOT get my coveted vote.  If someone wants to shun or hate me for my personal ethics, I figure it's their loss.  I have many friends who voted for the new President and I cherish them still.  Heart

 

Back to the "single's thing"...Soosie, I'm afraid all of us might be paying a little more for our Depends!  It won't matter though if our children all have jobs, right?  Talk about tough decisions!  Woman Wink

 

(All in good fun!)

 

 

"Never succumb to the temptation of bitterness." ~ Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr.

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Re: Where Have All The Singles Gone?

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Message 23 of 30

@Soosie - My guess is that AARP wasn't very detailed about what the "partnering with S&M" entailed. Being a realist, I didn't trust them .. but the S&M Administrator (John?) hoped for the best. It did grow the membership, but what good is that if most of those people just "lurked" or didn't stick around & become regulars. Nothing like having non-singles tell you what to do! Smiley Happy


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Re: Where Have All The Singles Gone?

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Message 24 of 30
The moderator of Single and Mingle swore he knew nothing of the take over. I always thought that may not be true.
It seemed foolish to me to have the experts come in the group. I did soon feel sorry for them because they were "eaten alive." I'm not sure what they were expecting, but we were experienced daters, break up artists, and a bit miffed that this happened to us.

I find it so sad that people would drop a friendship with you because of your political leanings. I have friends of all races, political leanings, education and other. I think myself very lucky to have this.

Soosie
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Re: Where Have All The Singles Gone?

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Message 25 of 30

@Prosecco6247 - It's great to see you posting in Online Community again, and hope this is a better year for your family, health-wise!

 

@Soosie - There's no end to how personally people take politics, and I know that you & I are on the same side. I belong to a private women's group on FB, that's an outgrowth of an international organization of which we're members. Another regular send me a friend request & I approved it, but minutes later she asked either if I were a Republican or supported Trump, because of my political friends' posts in my feed. She then announced that she couldn't be my friend, or even talk to me, because of that!

 

A little history about the Singles groups: Back in 2012, SP was larger than S&M, and had almost 700 members! At different times, AARP reached out to the Administrators of both "Single & Mingle" and "Singles Perspective", asking if we wanted them to highlight our groups, or be tied in with their experts. I knew that publicity came at a price & declined; "Single & Mingle" accepted their offer. Suddenly, S&M grew exponentially, although only a fraction of the newbies ever uploaded photos or personal avatars, or posted regularly. After I saw what the experts were posting, I was glad I'd declined their offer for SP!


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Re: Where Have All The Singles Gone?

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Message 26 of 30

Awesome comeback!  Woman LOL

"Never succumb to the temptation of bitterness." ~ Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr.

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Re: Where Have All The Singles Gone?

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Message 27 of 30
The ones on my Facebook page have the same political leanings as I have. I am always amazed when people show hatred toward someone just because they voted differently. We are all Americans and need to think that way.

Now, back to the singles' thing. I still laugh a bit about my post to the experts. She wrote something about when to become intimate. He wrote about when to talk about money. I wrote something like this....."Let me see if I understand, I should ask for the money before I drop my depends.?" That's when the trouble started.

Soosie
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Re: Where Have All The Singles Gone?

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Message 28 of 30

Thanks for the update, Soosie!  I don't do FB but if I ever go back to it, I would love to connect with them!  

 

It was a sad day  Woman Frustrated  when the group you're speaking of was taken over.  You're correct, most of us know how to date already.  A fair number didn't date by choice and just enjoyed kibitzing with the other singles who "hung out" there.  They say you can't stand in the way of progress (HA!) and it looks like you can't stand in the way of corporate profits as well!

"Never succumb to the temptation of bitterness." ~ Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr.

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Re: Where Have All The Singles Gone?

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Message 29 of 30
I think the singles that wrote in the large group that we once had moved on when AARP decided to use the group to launch their (or someone's) dating site. I understand that like most dating sites, it was a disaster. The final blow came when the two experts came on-board. She was married and seemed to be telling us how to trap a man. He was a man who seemed to want to use the board for a sounding board about his newly met girlfriend. I think the group darn well knew how to date if we wanted to and didn't need the experts (I say with a smile).

Some of that group are now on my Facebook page and I love hearing from them. I consider them long time friends.

Soosie
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Where Have All The Singles Gone?

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Message 30 of 30

It's nice to come back here and see familiar old friends as well as see what they're up to!

 

Scrolling through the list of topics and seeing less frequent activity prompts me to ask where all the "singles" are...(besides the core group, I mean!)

 

Time was, this and another group or two hosted a vibrant singles' population and a wide variety of topics to choose from.  Singles dropped in and out, posting some interesting and provocative topics, keeping the conversational ball in the air for long periods of time.

 

I won't claim to be "ever-faithful" myself, having been MIA due to family issues & illnesses and increasing responsibilities in the past year or so that left me mentally & physically fatigued and with little energy to be creative or responsive to posts.  I'd dip in and read from time to time in an effort to keep up but I discovered that that the numbers of posts seem to wane each month.

 

I wonder if this is a function of our ages, simply not having the time, perhaps a decreasing interest or if it's due to lesser numbers of AARP discussion group participants available for comment.

 

I love to see what people are doing in their "single" lives...their activities, travels, hobbies, fashions, unique problems & solutions across the broad spectrum of singlehood, day-to-day lives & lifestyles...there's so much diversity among a group of singles!  

 

I feel pretty sure others have the same curiosity &/or perhaps simply enjoy conversing about the highs & lows in their own lives and comparing their notes with those of other singles.

 

So...does anyone know where all the singles have gone?

"Never succumb to the temptation of bitterness." ~ Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr.

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