Loneliness or alone-ness

[SassiLady]

@d829124b

@ASTRAEA

Just because there is a large age gap doesn't mean you won't have any interests in common with this age group. I have always gotten along with people 10-20 years older and younger than I am. I also have a DIL that is 51 and has friends from 40's-80's.

Putting age aside you might just try out a couple of groups and see what happens. 

Does the town have a library, do you like to read, and is there reading group?  I have a friend that is in her mid 80's that belongs to such a group at the library.

These are ways to get to know people and make friends.

[nyadrn]

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@m907706g wrote:

These posts speak volumes to me.  I have one cousin in town who I am close to. My therapist thinks I isolate but what other choice do I have. It takes money to do stuff.  I swim 3 times a week,  I go to thrift shops often and see people.  I do live alone, with the exception of my cat.  I read a great deal and frequent this site quite a bit.  I attend a writer's group.  I often go to the library and am taking a safe driver's class later this month.  I try to stay alert for various activities  I'm completely non-secular so have no interest whatsoever in that vein. Thinkng about volunteering somehow if an opportunity arises.

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It seems to me that you are quite active. I am sorry that you don't have family or s close friend near.  

[m907706g]

These posts speak volumes to me.  I have one cousin in town who I am close to. My therapist thinks I isolate but what other choice do I have. It takes money to do stuff.  I swim 3 times a week,  I go to thrift shops often and see people.  I do live alone, with the exception of my cat.  I read a great deal and frequent this site quite a bit.  I attend a writer's group.  I often go to the library and am taking a safe driver's class later this month.  I try to stay alert for various activities  I'm completely non-secular so have no interest whatsoever in that vein. Thinkng about volunteering somehow if an opportunity arises.

[ASTRAEA]

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@d829124b wrote:

I love in a rural community and am disabled. The community is very family based so as a 50 year old single person there is nothing. I belong to a Church but outside of Church everyone is once again family focused. I do not have the gas money to go into the big city to join groups or activities. 

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@d829124b - Is there a nearby larger town that might be better for you, being disabled & alone? Would you consider moving?

I find that the "senior" activities in my town, because they're all during the daytime, are attended by older retirees .. AARP, Women's Club, etc. So for someone in their 50s, or even their 60s, you feel a little out-of-place, in a group where the minimum age of other participants is 70-75!

[d829124b]

I love in a rural community and am disabled. The community is very family based so as a 50 year old single person there is nothing. I belong to a Church but outside of Church everyone is once again family focused. I do not have the gas money to go into the big city to join groups or activities. 

[SassiLady]

@nyadrnYes, very good advice, in the meantime my oldest and his 'wife' are going to be away for five or six weeks. They are leaving the beginning of June and I am really looking forward to being alone, well as much alone as having the company of 2 dogs, 1 cat and 3 chickens, will allow.

[nyadrn]

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@SassiLady wrote:

@Calhounwoman

@ASTRAEA

I seem to still be stuck in the same old place. Unfortunately many health issues are keeping me busy, hmm, I would rather be doing things with friends, of which I have none in this area.

I am busy seeing doctors and having tests and we have made some progress but not as much as I would want.

I am still thinking of moving in with my youngest son and his wife but want to try and get my health issues settled before I have to go changing doctors since they live 250 miles from where I am, but in the same state. I stayed with them when I first moved here and they insisted they take me everywhere they went and my dil took me every where she went when my son was at work. I should have listened to him when he told me to keep my money in the bank and use it for myself.>>

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Nothing is promised in this life esp tomorrow..  being unhappy does not help with any health issues.  There are good doctors and facilities everywhere.. make the move as soon as you can.  Make sure you have your documents current including power of attorney etc in case you will need assistance during any type of illness care and you want to make sure the right family member is making decisions for you.  Just my opinion   Best of luck.

[SassiLady]

@pvdugas

(That which you attempt to control...controls you - Iyanla Vanzant)

AHA!  Just like living with a cat. LOL!

[SassiLady]

@Calhounwoman, @ASTRAEA

Thank you, I realize we tend to forgive others but never ourselves.

[Calhounwoman]

@ASTRAEA Yes, I totally understand! LOL!!!