From travel insurance to fraud protection, AARP has you covered. Take a closer look at your member benefits.

 

Reply
Treasured Social Butterfly
1
Kudos
2204
Views

Re: Life Milestones

2,204 Views
Message 21 of 33

@nctarheel - You're totally off-base & overthinking my comments. I said it was my last post "to answer you", since it is off-topic .. not "my last post to you". It was about the change in the workplace I'm sure the men I worked with experienced, when they had to get used to women being there. It had nothing to do with you or men in general.


Registered on Online Community since 2007!
Report Inappropriate Content
1
Kudos
2204
Views
Valued Social Butterfly
0
Kudos
2195
Views

Re: Life Milestones

2,195 Views
Message 22 of 33

@ASTRAEA wrote:

@nctarheel - Not to get too far off-topic (last post to answer you), but when I first started working, there were no other women in the power plant, and the men thought nothing about using obscenities, or even adjusting their pants in a group. So I'm sure they thought that was a "relaxed atmosphere" they liked .. until I arrived & they had to act more civilized.


I am not sure why you are taking what I thought was an innocuous comment about work places being more "laid back" years ago and turning it into either a "me" thing or a "man" thing.

 

I basically was talking about how my workplace became less and less fun. We used to have Christmas Parties, Going Away functions, retirement gigs, Thanksgiving office dinners, and other team building get togethers....... one by one, no one wanted to take the time to plan, execute, or organize these functions.

 

That is what I was talking about.

 

I may be wrong but between your "last post to you" comment and the "men had to act more civilized" comment, all I hear is criticism of my rather innocuous wish for times gone past.

 

Please correct me if I am wrong, @ASTRAEA.

Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
2195
Views
Treasured Social Butterfly
0
Kudos
2184
Views

Re: Life Milestones

2,184 Views
Message 23 of 33

@nctarheel - Not to get too far off-topic (last post to answer you), but when I first started working, there were no other women in the power plant, and the men thought nothing about using obscenities, or even adjusting their pants in a group. So I'm sure they thought that was a "relaxed atmosphere" they liked .. until I arrived & they had to act more civilized.


Registered on Online Community since 2007!
Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
2184
Views
Treasured Social Butterfly
1
Kudos
2147
Views

Re: Life Milestones

2,147 Views
Message 24 of 33

@ASTRAEA wrote:

@nyadrn - I think that in the work setting, people need to really know someone very well, before arranging any kind of party for them; some people appreciate it, but others are more private & are either embarassed or angry.

 

Yes definately!!   He was really embarrassed and therefore so were all of us.  I think that is really true for everyone planning a surprise for someone.  Do it for them not you and make sure it is something they will really like !

Life's a Journey, not a Destination" Aerosmith
Report Inappropriate Content
1
Kudos
2147
Views
Valued Social Butterfly
1
Kudos
1977
Views

Re: Life Milestones

1,977 Views
Message 25 of 33

@ASTRAEA wrote:

I think that in the work setting, people need to really know someone very well, before arranging any kind of party for them; some people appreciate it, but others are more private & are either embarassed or angry.


My staff knew me well so all was taken in jest; however, I reached several "milestones" during my employ with this group and the "decoration" of my office was the tamer of the "celebrations.

 

It's another topic, but, in my memory, workplaces were more fun to work in years ago than they are now.  People didn't seem to be as "up tight". I guess it depends where you are...... and I also guess it depends on what decade I'm talking about.

Report Inappropriate Content
1
Kudos
1977
Views
Treasured Social Butterfly
1
Kudos
1977
Views

Re: Life Milestones

1,977 Views
Message 26 of 33

@nyadrn - I think that in the work setting, people need to really know someone very well, before arranging any kind of party for them; some people appreciate it, but others are more private & are either embarassed or angry.


Registered on Online Community since 2007!
Report Inappropriate Content
1
Kudos
1977
Views
Treasured Social Butterfly
1
Kudos
1948
Views

Re: Life Milestones

1,948 Views
Message 27 of 33

@ASTRAEA wrote:

@nctarheel - I never think of being "bounded" by milestones like that, although facts are facts. When I was diagnosed with breast cancer at 62, I did think back to calculate how old my Mom was, when she had 2 different bouts with cancer. And while she and one aunt died fairly young due to it, I can look at many other family members who lasted well into their mid-90s, with all the faculties.

 

No one who worked for or with me, would have had the nerve to put a gift basket like that together for any milestone birthday of mine! Smiley Wink


Actually that is a pretty common thing..  the over the hill hats and balloons etc.  I doubt anyone really enjoys those.. and this made me remember a particular event at work.

We had a new boss who turned 50.  I really really do not think he thought anyone would bring it up but his secretary (assistant or whatever she was called) found out  and thought it would be a good way to introduce him to more of the employees, so she arranged a party.   Well when he came into the room and saw the big Happy 50th signs etc, you could pretty much see the blood rush to his face and the unhappiness was easy to read.  He did not want to be looked upon as an "older man" to all of the younger staff.  It was the quickest party we ever had.  She eventually retired.   It was not a good thing.

 

 

 

 

Life's a Journey, not a Destination" Aerosmith
Report Inappropriate Content
1
Kudos
1948
Views
Treasured Social Butterfly
0
Kudos
1937
Views

Re: Life Milestones

1,937 Views
Message 28 of 33

@nctarheel - I never think of being "bounded" by milestones like that, although facts are facts. When I was diagnosed with breast cancer at 62, I did think back to calculate how old my Mom was, when she had 2 different bouts with cancer. And while she and one aunt died fairly young due to it, I can look at many other family members who lasted well into their mid-90s, with all the faculties.

 

No one who worked for or with me, would have had the nerve to put a gift basket like that together for any milestone birthday of mine! Smiley Wink


Registered on Online Community since 2007!
Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
1937
Views
Treasured Social Butterfly
4
Kudos
1936
Views

Re: Life Milestones

1,936 Views
Message 29 of 33

Good and interesting topic both in how others interperet "milestones" and in how people look at them!

 

I don't really look at age milestones too much.. more often, I look at achievements and goals.. things I want to do and have planned and done.  I was talking to my son recently and we were talking about future travel plans and I told him that when I am gone he never has to wonder if there was anything that I wish I had done,  I told him that everything that I had really wanted to do I had done and I had no regrets.   (Of course I still have a long list LOL).  I remembered times when I first thought about doing something, then thought about the cost, and finally decided that the doing was more important to me than the saving of the money and there was not one of those instances I would ever regret.  Many had to do with the things I did with my family.  Memories I would never trade for more money in the bank as those relatives are long past and the opportunities would never present themselves again.

 

So.. am I gonna have a party at 70 ?  Probably  but I will be thinking of what I want to do.  It might be a party of two or three in a different city but there is no reason to turn down a party.

 : )

 

 

Life's a Journey, not a Destination" Aerosmith
Report Inappropriate Content
4
Kudos
1936
Views
Valued Social Butterfly
3
Kudos
1922
Views

Re: Life Milestones

1,922 Views
Message 30 of 33

@ASTRAEA wrote:

I thought about this topic, because a friend took me out for my birthday the other day, and when I thanked her, she said it was a "milestone birthday" (65 .. this coming week). I can't avoid knowing that it's a milestone, because I had to file for Medicare & switch over my other medical coverage earlier this month!

 

My Mom & one aunt both died of similar cancers, only months before my 50th birthday, another elderly aunt moved in with me, and I broke my foot .. so that surely didn't seem like a time I'd want to celebrate a milestone birthday! I did decide to stop working, and jokingly told people that was my 50th birthday present to myself!

 

I did have a 60th birthday party for friends & family, which was a few years after I moved, and was starting something of a new life. I guess the next milestone would be 75 ..


@ASTRAEA,

 

I, personally, would refrain from thinking of things in milestones. That sort of creates what I call "end points" in your mind.

 

For example, my mother died young.... I thought about that when I passed her age. Then there was the average age of my mother & father upon their deaths...I thought about that when i passed that age. Then there's the "milestones" that you were commenting on, and society makes you think about those (friends kid you about the birthday, special greeting cards exist for these birthdays, etc). Heck, when I turned 50 my office staff draped my office in black material, put a black wreath on my door, and attached to the wreath was packages of Doans Liver Pills, Preparation H, Icy Hot, ...well, you get the idea. Sad thing is.... I thought that was hilarious back then and now I use several of the products that were on that wreath.

 

Anyhow..........................

 

Personally, my thinking is that you shouldn't put any weight on reaching a milestone birthday.

 

Why do I say that?

 

Because anyone could die tomorrow. You could be 35, 50, 66, or 95.

 

I believe in "carpe diem".

 

While I don't mean spend all your savings because you don't know what day is your last; I do mean that if you have something you always wanted to do but haven't done it for one reason or another, and you can afford it, then get it done...... you don't know if the opportunity will present itself again.

Report Inappropriate Content
3
Kudos
1922
Views
cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 
Users
Announcements

Have a question about AARP membership or benefits? Ask it in the AARP Help Membership forum, Benefits & Discounts forum, or General forum.


multiple white question marks with center red question mark